30st 5lb Start Weight

Oh sweetie, big hugs!

What happened to make you feel much more anxious? My ex was controlling too (nothing to the extent of yours though) and it easily messes you up, I was always questioning myself and full of doubts and uncertainty.

All I can say is you never have to be there again - he's not in your life, you've got your lovely tree surgeon, and you're in control of good decisions, like eating healthily and going for walks in the wonderful fresh sea air xxxxxx
 
Having a bad mental health day today :( Felt it yesterday too but it's worse today :( I'm still taking my tablets but I think I have other issues too. I think I have ocd and control issues, stemming from when I was married to my ex. It has effected me so much. He controlled EVERYTHING and now I feel like I have to be in control because I never want to feel like I felt with him ever again. But if something happens out of my control I feel like I'm losing it. It's awful! I sound like I'm mental! I probably am. I dont think anti deps are gonna sort this out, i do need to see the Dr but anxiety wise I'm not ready yet :(

I thought you were quiet missy - was getting a bit worried. Totally out of my depth on advice for this one other than to say here to listen, always xx

Ps and as for that ex of yours.......... £&"?!*%#}#%%<
 
Having a bad mental health day today :(

Felt it yesterday too but it's worse today :(

I'm still taking my tablets but I think I have other issues too. I think I have ocd and control issues, stemming from when I was married to my ex. It has effected me so much. He controlled EVERYTHING and now I feel like I have to be in control because I never want to feel like I felt with him ever again. But if something happens out of my control I feel like I'm losing it. It's awful! I sound like I'm mental! I probably am.

I dont think anti deps are gonna sort this out, i do need to see the Dr but anxiety wise I'm not ready yet :(

So sorry that you're having a bad day, wish I had some great advice for you after you was so kind to me yesterday.
 
Thank you for your kind words ladies :) it means a lot that I have support here and that people actually care xxx

I'm not sure what triggered the anxiety, I think it has something to do with my mini goal of losing 2 stone by my bday. I have 9.4lbs to go in a week and I don't think I can do it. I would have made it I reckon, if I hadn't been ill and had totm last week and I think I felt like I lost a bit of the control I had.

I did eat some bad things but I checked on MFP and I haven't actually gone over my cals so it wasn't as bad as I thought.

I did a couple of hours of admin tonight at my sisters business, her admin girl is a bit useless and hasn't been turning up so as I'm a trained administrator she asked me to do a bit. It was all about diets etc, she has her clients do the harcombe diet. I tried and lost a bit but it's not a sustainable diet for me. I don't wanna not have bread and cheese together. It seems illegal to me!!!

Anyway, she does phone consultations so while she on the phone to some woman in London, I was tippy typing away trying to decifer her note taking and getting some free diet advice via eavesdropping :D
It helped a bit to be surrounded by diet paraphernalia and it got me a bit more focussed again.

I decided that although I may not make 2 stone by my bday I can have a jolly good go at it and I mustn't forget ive lost 18.6lbs in 3 weeks and that's not to be sniffed at at all!

I am going to re listen to PMcK in a min and re install all the things I learned and follow that this week. I need to drink more water and I need to get up before 12 no matter how much sleep I have had.

I am *reasonably* good at doling out advice and inspirational words but very bad at listening to it myself. I must be my own motivator.

So, plan for tomorrow:

Wake up and listen to PMcK again.
Drink a pint of water
Have breakfast of fruit and yog
Drink a pint of water
Have lunch of jp and salad
Drink a pint of water
Have tea of chilli con carne
Drink a pint of water
Do a Leslie sansone walk or walk round the block - 15 mins
Drink a pint of water
Don't eat while watching TV.
Go to bed early and listen to PMcK

If I've not logged on and said good morning by 12 then you can tell me off :D

Now to try to sleep!
 
Your plan sounds great and lovely to see that fighting spirit I saw the first 2 weeks.

I never ever hit my mini targets - in weight loss, saving, sorting my wardrobe but aim high and if you get even close that's a great thing. I never feel disappointed as long as I'm in control and things are moving. I'm disappointed when I binge for no reason!!

You have done amazing and knowing you, if you put your mind to it you could have a good loss this week. But you know what, if you don't and it's a couple of pounds it's not the end of the world. You lose 2lbs a week this year and you'll be 7 stone lighter on New Year's Eve ;-)

I will be checking in at noon and ready to prod you if you haven't emerged from your cocoon!!
 
Here I am!!

Didn't sleep until 3am :| up and awake now and omg it's so cold today!! Poor old Joe is out in this up a tree somewhere getting blown about. I do worry about him!

Anyway, I listened to the first section of PMcK to prepare for the second bit so I'm gonna lay on the sofa with the cat and listen to that now then hopefully I will get on with my day if the hypnotism doesn't knock me out :D

You are right Cat, about it being ok if it's only a couple of lbs. I have to keep in mind that I can't lose it all at once and that plodding on will definitely all count at the end of the year.

I decided I'm going to weigh next on my bday and I'm going to get joe to hide the scales somewhere so I can't get on them.

7 days being extra good should give me my feb goal at least. Hopefully! Xx
 
I think mini goals can be a useful tool, but it depends on your personality. Like Cat says, if you aim high it can spur you on, even if you don't achieve your target. On the other hand it can be very demotivating to not make your goal. Personally, I didn't set mini goals as such, but did join in some challenges on here, always with a very modest target! So in the new year I'd say I wanted to lose, say, half a stone by Easter, just to keep me focused. That's what worked for me, as putting too much pressure on myself doesn't work. :) xx
 
I think mini goals can be a useful tool, but it depends on your personality. Like Cat says, if you aim high it can spur you on, even if you don't achieve your target. On the other hand it can be very demotivating to not make your goal. Personally, I didn't set mini goals as such, but did join in some challenges on here, always with a very modest target! So in the new year I'd say I wanted to lose, say, half a stone by Easter, just to keep me focused. That's what worked for me, as putting too much pressure on myself doesn't work. :) xx

I think the key is not to beat yourself up over the speed of weightloss. Unless you're doing one of these brutal food replacement VLCD it is actually quite difficult to lose a lot of weight every week.

My BMR is around 1500. Add on around 300 calories from walking, menial tasks in the day and I burn 1800 calories. I have a desk job and when I get home I'm in front of the TV so 300 extra is totally realistic.

To lose 1lb of fat I need to save 3500 calories in a week. So say I exercise twice per week burning 400 calories each time. I've still got to save 2700 calories from food. That's 400 calories a day. So I can only eat 1400 per day.

Now imagine I have a bottle of wine one day and a cake. Modest extras on a Saturday you'd think - but it would mean that week i probably lose half a pound only.l even though I've worked out twice and "been good" nearly all week.

It's very tough. Yes if you are a little on the curvier side your BMR will be much higher and your weekly losses greater, but massive losses every week aren't mathematically possible unless you're starving yourself.

I think the key isn't speed, it's consistency. Eating normal food in moderation like you, me, Tracy and understanding that it may take longer.

You are doing so well and have your birthday as a lovely mini goal - just don't beat yourself up if you don't hit that 2 stone. You'll get it, just maybe a week or two later :)
 
Blondcat said:
I think the key is not to beat yourself up over the speed of weightloss. Unless you're doing one of these brutal food replacement VLCD it is actually quite difficult to lose a lot of weight every week.

My BMR is around 1500. Add on around 300 calories from walking, menial tasks in the day and I burn 1800 calories. I have a desk job and when I get home I'm in front of the TV so 300 extra is totally realistic.

To lose 1lb of fat I need to save 3500 calories in a week. So say I exercise twice per week burning 400 calories each time. I've still got to save 2700 calories from food. That's 400 calories a day. So I can only eat 1400 per day.

Now imagine I have a bottle of wine one day and a cake. Modest extras on a Saturday you'd think - but it would mean that week i probably lose half a pound only.l even though I've worked out twice and "been good" nearly all week.

It's very tough. Yes if you are a little on the curvier side your BMR will be much higher and your weekly losses greater, but massive losses every week aren't mathematically possible unless you're starving yourself.

I think the key isn't speed, it's consistency. Eating normal food in moderation like you, me, Tracy and understanding that it may take longer.

You are doing so well and have your birthday as a lovely mini goal - just don't beat yourself up if you don't hit that 2 stone. You'll get it, just maybe a week or two later :)

Definitely, that's spot on. As long as your expectations are reasonable, you stand a good chance of succeeding. Taking things more steadily also enables you to get in the correct mindset for long-term maintenance, which is definitely tricky! My mind still plays tricks on me, even 3.5 years in, lol. :) xx
 
You've done amazingly well so far! I do love my mini targets but tend to keep then reasonable. I found that if I was pushed into saying a higher loss at class than I was really wanting to do, I would worry and eat less which actually slowed my weight loss down. I'm now of the mindset that I didn't get to this weight overnight so it's not going to come off quickly either. It's more about learning good eating habits and settling in for the long haul. Any week that ends with a loss and without a huge bar of dairy milk in my hand is a big step in the right direction.
 
of course it can be completely upsetting over not reaching mini targets, there was a woman at class on Monday in tears because she'd maintained and not lost, poor lamb. I am so undisciplined, though, if I worried too much about targets, I'd never stay on the wagon!

The others are on the money hun - just focus on what you've lost so far and lose what you can for your birthday - which you are going to enjoy to the utmost, because it's a celebration of the new you xxx
 
How's your day been doll?
 
Day hasn't bee too bad at all. My niece ended up coming for tea so ran round after her for 3 hours and counted that as my exercise coz tbh my back is killing me :(

Had toast and a bagel for breakfast (was meant to be fruit but it was too cold to have cold food)

Jp and salad for lunch

Chilli con carne for tea

I drank all my water :) I have a steel water container that I got from ebay (£12) it's very handy to have next to you and the cats can't drink out of it either!!

Had a good text chat with a friend off here and we both decided that we must not give up and that we are going to weigh on Mondays and have Monday as a treat night (instead of a treat weekend) and have something we like so we don't feel like we are missing out.
I won't have something too heavy, I could probably have Chinese but we are trying to save up for a new car and stuff so have agreed not to have a weekly takeaway.

My daily aim is to eat healthy meals under cals, stop when I'm feeling full and try to be a bit more active. Not necessarily exercise while my back is bad but to do more round the house and things.

I have 1.4lbs until I get to 20lbs so I'm aiming for that for Wednesday. Then weigh each Monday and not pressure myself. Each lb down makes a difference and adds up.

I appreciate people's support xxxxx
 
Excellent plan! I need to get out of the habit of binge weekend!!
 
Slept from about 2 til 6:30 which isn't great but is at least in the right area of the night!

Need to try to go to bed earlier and relax before bed and not watch Dexter which gets me all worked up as I love it so much :D

Tonight's meal is lamb and I don't eat lamb, haven't done since I was a child and we had a pet lamb called Lotty who we took down the beach on a lead :)
Joe bought a joint from lidl as it was on offer so I'll be doing veg and whatnot for them and who knows what I'll have! I have some left over chilli from last night but I may have that for lunch. We shall see! X
 
Hello! popping into subscribe and say you have done so well so far. I do set myself targets as I think they motivate me but if I don't hit them then I try to look at what I have achieved. I wanted to hit 5 stone by Xmas and only lost 4 but I've never lost 4 stone on a diet before (probably got to 2 and a half max) and that is still a big deal. If you don't hit two stone you've still lost 18lbs in a month which is an amazing loss. (I've sent you a friend request on mfp too by the way but my name over there is different in case you are wondering - same profile pic though.)
 
How have you been getting on? Xx

Day 3 finished on my detox and still on it 100%. Lost 6lbs btw Monday and weds - just shows how much water retention / rubbish I was retaining. As 6lbs of fat loss in 48 hours at my size is not mathematically possible, but I'm not complaining as feel so much better and less bloated.

Work drinks tonight - free bar. Not sure if I'll go yet. If I do I'll try and stick to vodka, soda water and fresh lime for 50cals. But every drink I have will eat into my 600 calorie dinner allowance and I think I want food more you know?!!

Tired today though, I was rubbish in gym this morning.
 
Day 3 finished on my detox and still on it 100%. Lost 6lbs btw Monday and weds - just shows how much water retention / rubbish I was retaining. As 6lbs of fat loss in 48 hours at my size is not mathematically possible, but I'm not complaining as feel so much better and less bloated. Work drinks tonight - free bar. Not sure if I'll go yet. If I do I'll try and stick to vodka, soda water and fresh lime for 50cals. But every drink I have will eat into my 600 calorie dinner allowance and I think I want food more you know?!! Tired today though, I was rubbish in gym this morning.

Well done on mathematically impossible loss :)

Hope you enjoy your drinks! I would rather have food than alcohol too! Xx
 
Food today:

Bagel

Bagel

Cauli and broc cheese and a cadburys mini egg dessert.

I've not had bagels before and they were on offer in tesco, cinnamon raisin ones, so got some and love them!!! 226 cals each so quite a lot but they are very filling.

So had one for breakfast and one for lunch

Did joe and dunc lamb with veg and cauli and broc cheese and I just had the cauli and bric. Half a plates worth but it was enough. And then joe had got some cadburys puddings from the shop on the way home. It was yummy! 225 cals! Worth it though :)
X
 
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