41st birthday present

[frankiec]

I promised myself not to be fat & 40 and didn't quite get there. Okay I was a very fit 40 as I joined a gym training program with a diet program attached last year and I worked very hard at it - for 3 months and then couldn't get back onto the eating plan - but stayed at the fitness side for ages until the whole eating thing got me completely down!!! It was more having to explain over and over to the instructors why it wasn't working for me - and they thinking it was as easy as jsut doing it for a week!! I'm sure to alot of people it is, but I'm either 100% or 0% - total black and white, that's me - which is why something like this suits me - as long as I can stick to it!!!
So here I am. Only 5 weeks to go to my 41st birthday. I won't be where I want to by then, but I'll be on the road.......
My first goal was to look good for an event last Saturday - and my dress was lovely and comfortable. Next goal is end April for a holiday and I need to be fitting into some of my jeans for then. I'll be away for nearly a week, so will do a refeed leading into it and will be going back on TFR once I get back and then next goal is fitting back into a particular pair of jeans and my final goal is another pair of jeans - hoping to be there mid June time!
It's been so far so good for me with this. I have 2 weeks done and lost 13lb first week and another 7 last week . TOTM at the moment and while rarely put on weight or get bloated, feeling very bloated this time - guzzling water trying to get past it!!!
I've been reading posts here for a while. Started to do this last Friday, but got distracted and lost my post!!

I've lots of energy now and have taken back to walking with a vengenance - well so far only at night, need to get back to going for my lunch-time walk as well - its only a habit, but it always seems to be half way through lunch when I think of it!

Just about to have 2nd shake - think going to mix with coffee today for a change.

 

[frankiec]

Okay mixing with coffee not a good idea! Well not the way I tried to do it with my shaker - ended up with sticky coffee mixture all over me and the result was horrible too! Think need to leave this treat for the weekend and do properly.
Loads of energy again, but I'm sleeping way more than before and struggling to get up. Had over 9 hours sleep last night and could have slept on another 2 or 3 hours - I love my sleep, but even that's alot for me.
Went for lovely long (fast) walk last night - great to feel like doing that again - and great to have the energy to enjoy it. Last weekend before starting this, went to an event, parked some way from it and the walk nearly killed me - although I had decided to do this anyway, that was the final straw for me - I'd never ever been so unfit that I struggled to walk to an event - walk was probably 10-15 minutes only!

 

[frankiec]

Weigh-in on Saturday and down 3lbs. So now over 1.5 stone in 3 weeks. Delighted with Saturday as any loss was going to take me to that 1.5 and that was my target.
Found Friday and Saturday very hard - craving stuff! Expecting that it would have got easier by now, but I seem to hit days when I just crave stuff.
Then all fine yesterday - to the point where after watching Jamie Oliver was able to go get his cookery book and pore over it with my husband and didn't make me want anything!!

 

[suzanne42]

well done !
I keep craving stuff to, not because im hungry.i think its cos the shakes are a bit boring ,they could do with inventing more variety to TFR .
Best of luck for this week

 

[katieg]

Well done in getting 1.5 st in just 3 weeks, thats a great loss!!!
I hope i can achieve what you have!!
Keep up the good work!!!

 

[frankiec]

Yesterday seemed easier than last number of days - no reason that I can think of! No cravings for anything. glad I have those days, it's the easy days make the hard ones possible!!
Great reading other diaries and seeing everyone struggling with the same issues - knowing you're not alone helps!
Delighted with the difference in my clothes yesterday. Tend to wear same clothes to work most of the time and have this loose cardigan I wear - but there was a decided bump in the looseness for quite some time - now it's just hanging loose again! Last week I split coffee all over myself one day and up to then I would have had to go home and wash and dry those clothes in one night - nothing else fitted!! But last week was able to pull out another pants and wear it - last time I wore that pants the waistband dug into me all day- last week it was actually quite comfortable!!
Haven't tried on any other clothes yet, need to drop another stone or so before I start seeing clothes fitting - but with LT a stone is quite achievable in a short time!!
As you can see, full of the joys today!!!

 

[frankiec]

Survived last night and pancakes! I LOVE pancakes - oh cooks them for Shrove Tues as he's just much better at cooking than me - but every so often during the year, I'd make some for my breakfast - I'm not as fussy about my cooking!!!! So last night was hard. Doggy sat next to cooker with big brown begging eyes - and he got the first pancake which was a bit thick! And it was I fed it to him - not easy - it was very tempting, but I have to be proud of myself for never even considering tasting a little bit - instead I concentrated on making woof work for every piece.
Next challenge Easter Sunday........ I'm a worrywart, always have been! And here I am 6 weeks before Easter worrying about it. I'll have started a refeed then as we're on hols afterwards. On Easter Sunday, I'll be in day-2 and I'm worried if I'll have the willpower to actaully do the refeed properly and not be tempted by chocolate - my oh is very supportive of what I'm doing, but not enough to forego his easter egg - and I wouldn't expect him to or ask him to!!!

 

[Leluna]

you sound so like me! Had my 40th last year and was determined to look skinny... didnt get there... my 41st just gone and still didnt get there! So took the bull by the horns and here goes... on day 6 now and starting to get the ol energy back and feel great! Good luck to all of us!!

 

[frankiec]

Weigh-in on Saturday and down 5lbs - so that's 2 stone gone! Very motivated by that, but then have the night-time horrors of thinking of the long road ahead!!!

But then remind myself that it's 6 weeks to my holidays and that needs to be my mini-goal and I'll see a huge difference by then and then can come back and deal with the remainder!

I can really see difference now and can feel it in my clothes. And I feel better and fitter - happy to go out now and take the dog for a walk and enjoy it - before I started this, I got a terrible fright at how unfit I was when I had to walk about a mile to an event - my legs were cramping and I just couldn't go faster than a snail's pace despite being late!! I hate being late! It was the biggest wake-up call of my life - I've always been a walker and no matter how heavy I was always able to walk fast - but then I was over a stone heavier than I'd ever been before!

 

[Leluna]

well done frankiec! Great news.. keep it up!

 

[macabar]

Wow fantastic on your improved fitness! It seems impossible to turn the ship around, but it really isn't is it?
And congratulations on the 28 pounds, that's a great beginning!

 

[frankiec]

Found yesterday so hard - no idea why, but having cravings all day - could practically imagine myself chewing on a nice crusty slice of bread! But didn't do it!!
Went home last night to find Jaffa cakes up on table - assume OH came in, grabbed a few and took off for gym! I find that so hard when there is something unexpected I really like in plain sight like that - I'm used to him cooking his breakfast and dinner, and can deal with that very well. But I survived!
And then we went to cinema! I always have a huge tub of ice-cream at the cinema. I enjoyed the film just as much without - which just shows how much of a habit it really is - what I found difficult was hanging around as he got tickets and his pop-corn - usually I'd be choosing my flavours then.
For all that yesterday was hard, I feel great for having got through it.
I'm beginning to think these cravings will never go away - I thought 4 weeks in they would have by now!!!
Its just great though to come on here, write it all down and then its gone - rather than continuing to obsess about it - as I am so so good at doing.

 

[Cham Pers]

Well done you! I dont know if i can do cinema yet without any sweeties to keep me going!

 

[frankiec]

WI on Saturday and down 7lbs - but in my heart of hearts know its not a true 7lbs and worried that next week will be nothing or very low!!

I was at my parents Friday night and didn't take shakes with me, so didn't have my breakfast shake. Planned on getting to pharmacy early, but got delayed by various bits and pieces and then got further delayed as they had staffing problems! I've often been weighed in early in morning without mornign shake, but this was lunch-time, so I had gone the whole morning.
Not a good idea as I was all over the place for rest of day and craving everythign that moved.
Still not feeling right today- but some of that was down to not taking in enough water yesterday as we were away for the day and its a pain trying to find loos all the time!! I had such a headache last night - I've practically drowned myself with water already today - I'll have my 4 litres in by lunchtime at the rate I'm going! But I'm parched!
Starting to find the weekends hard! So looking forward to being able to join OH in meals again - its such a part of life!!!

 

[frankiec]

Well another WI on Saturday and down 8lbs!!! Could hardly believe my eyes. I've been walking regularly the past 2 weeks, but even allowing for that, I've lost 15lbs in 2 weeks - and weeks into the program.
TOTM now and that hit me badly last time out with a very low loss, so expecting same next week - but not too bothered about that as anything is a bonus after the fortnight I've had!!!
Really feeling the difference now. Clothes so much looser and can feel the changes in my body shape - lying down, my stomach is nearly flat!!
I have another 4 weeks to go to my holidays and another stone by then would be brilliant and that seems very achievable now!!

 

[frankiec]

So here I am again on Monday and 2lbs down. Mixture of things. TOTM seems to affect my weight-loss - which it never did before! But I think what affected me most this past week was a lunch I had out. One of those situations where I hadn't any choice - business lunch and no time to think of a way out. I had a salad, but I know there was dressing on it - ignored the garlic bread that came with it - which I know from past experience is yummy. Ignored most of the croutons too - although have to admit to tasting one. Then in case that wasn't bad enough my SIL had made some kind of chocolate thing and just insisted I try it - "no" didn't seem an option - and that's not like her usually! I did refuse any more.
So I was delighted to be down those 2lbs - I was perfect for rest of week and walked a lot too.
And now that I'll be 41 tomorrow, I am exactly the same weight as I was this time last year for my 40th. Depressing in one way as have had to work so hard to drop this weight I absolutely piled on since September. Struggled all summer with up and down about 1/2 stone to 3/4 stone, then dropped it using IPD for my holidays and then just went mad - couldn't get enough into me and that continued when I got home and I also gave up the (very expensive) gym and didn't take up anything else, despite buying weights and a bike!!!!
My head is in a different place this year and I'm still focusing on my holidays at the end of this month. 2 more weigh-ins and then in the middle of the following week have to start a refeed. Hoping to get 2 good losses in next 2 weeks and a small loss in the last week as will have done TFR for half the week - reckon I can still do the stone I was talking about last week.
Going home tonight to try on the first pair of jeans I need to get back into!! Think they should go on now and by holidays they should be fitting comfortably.

 

[frankiec]

Well the jeans did tie. Couldn't really go out in them yet, but another week or two and they'll be fine!

Need to go adjusting buttons in my work pants now - it's hanging off me - when its just out of the wash, the first day is fine, but the next day after that..... I've a long cardigan on today and I need it to cover the gap as it slips down. I'm going to move the buttons on it - won't look the best, but its a black one and its nearly time to be out of black anyway!!!

 

[frankiec]

Well bit of slip-up!

I had a dinner with my family last night - planned a while back and knew I had to go and knew I'd have to eat - that was okay as I had decided to have something small and just forget about it.
But suppliers on-site yesterday and they wanted to go for lunch - hoped they'd forget about it, but no, and had to have something with them - so that was 1st disaster yesterday - its the unplanned ones like that that trip me up. So had that. Then had bar of chocolate on way home - no need in world for! had dinner with family and had light sensible meal and was full after small portion and drank gallons of water.
But...... went home and literally binged on crisps - it was ridiculous - don't even know how many bags I ate - and if there had been more in the press, I'd have eaten them - and if we'd had bread, well that would have gone too. I was out of control.
So far so good today and I think I'll be okay. But I haven't learned anything here. I've lost 3.5 stone and I still just binged like that. I'm scared I'll be right back to square 1 in no time!

 

[frankiec]

Back at it today! That blip a few weeks ago led to a bad run-in to my holidays - always knew I'd need to refeed for them, but I ended up binging a week early and even though I did get back on track, it was only for a few days, when I was off again. Eventually realised I was going on holidays and would need to deal with it when I got back - so went on holidays and had a great time - holidays-wise and food-wise!! Drank lots of beer - which I never drink except on holidays and which goes straight to my midriff.
Got back and decided to get back on it - had a few shakes leftover - but couldn't seem to focus. Afraid to weigh myself - bad move! On Friday put on a snug pair of jeans -which seemed to fit same as last time I'd had them on. Next morning braved the scales and it wasn't that bad!
So for being a coward I lost a week where I could have got back on the wagon. Went for WI on Saturday and started back on properly yesterday - and in right mind set. I still have so much to loose.
Family event in 2 weeks and want to look someway good for it, another event the week after and then have a show 3 weeks later - event been training for with a while and there will be cameras there - don't want to be looking at photos like last year's where I have a big belly hanging out over my jeans and a big huge double chin.
And this year we have a 2nd show - about 3 weeks after that again. For both shows, have ear-marked jeans I want to wear - but I want to wear them where they fit properly - don't want lumps and bumps.

So here I am again, set for the final effort!

 

[emmievic]

Your weight loss was fantastic! Could only dream of 2 stone in 4 weeks!! Get back to it today and stay on track. Drink lots of water and moan to us!
Good luck with your re-start xxx