A question about sex as an overweight person...

Thanks Hidden for your comments, yes - my confidence is much better now, I think it developed with age and experience (eg, not wanting to repeat previous mistakes!)
I also find that my self-esteem shoots up as the weight decreases.
 
Would just like to echoe Blingbabe about self-esteem shooting up as weight decreases, a few years ago I was mortified to be the weight I am today, yet now although I have a fair way to go I feel soooooo much better than I did then.ps tried to add to your rep Blingbabe but wouldn't let me,sorry.
 
Peacocks do nice nighties and pjs and up to size 24-26, they are not to pricey so u can get a couple.

I got a nice nightie to wear for my bf, the lights went off and when I moved the nightie lit up with static! Got a good giggle at least. It was sparks all round from the human light bulb!

Good luck x
 
Blingbabe said:
Thanks Hidden for your comments, yes - my confidence is much better now, I think it developed with age and experience (eg, not wanting to repeat previous mistakes!)
I also find that my self-esteem shoots up as the weight decreases.
Click to expand...

Well sounds like there's hope for me yet! I know my confidence has definitely gone up as I've lost weight, but there's still a way to go! I have a feeling that all of this is going to play a big part in sorting out my confidence issues. For a long time I've found it impossible to think that someone might think I'm physically attractive. That they'd want to be in any kind of relationship with me. But now I'm starting to realise that's not true. He's starting to show me that's not true. It's like, every time he calls me beautiful, I start to believe it a little bit more. Eventually I'll know it for myself!
 
Well I'm heading to his tomorrow for the weekend, we'll see what happens I guess! We've said that what happens, happens. But don't want to plan. So we'll see :)
 
Woohoo! :D

You'll have a great time but more than anything else try and relax. It should be fun, perfect and special, not a stressful time.
 
Agrees with Jim!! :D have fun and relax!!! Good idea not to plan :D Enjoy!!
 
Oh I am so excited for you, you have a met this lovely man and i really hope you have a fun and fantastic weekend.

Have a couple of glasses of wine and just let things take their course, being sensual together can be more fulfilling than full sex sometimes. So relax and enjoy the attention honey.

xxxJSxxx
 
He's allergic to wine, but that won't stop me having a few!! To be honest I don't feel in the slightest bit nervous about anything, because I know there's no pressure at all. There's no expectations. I'm going to see him same as always and if anything happens, it happens. But it'll just happen, no planning, no scheduling, no pressure.
 
I would agree with many of the sentiments which have been expressed in this thread and I want to say thanks to those of you who have been so frank about how you feel about your bodies and sex.

Whilst there have been times in my life when I have been outwardly body positive (usually when my weight was good) I have always had issues with my body and intimacy. am now separated from the one person who I totally trusted and really "let in" to my life and he was a really good man but I guess my "stuff" just always got in the way.

I never would have thought that I would ever be contemplating the fact that I may have to get intimate with someone else. Right now I do have to lose weight and my body loathing is at its peak so if I hate it so much how could I believe that anyone could like it in any way at all!!

I absolutely admire you HIDDEN and you should go for it and make the most of someone who clearly respects you. I hope that you will be letting us know that it was a good weekend!

Daisy x
 
Good luck hidden, hope you're having a fab time (nudge nudge wink wink) ;)
 
I did have a fab time, but not in that way! It was nice having some time with him just chilling and cuddling and stuff. His family were all around so I don't think I would have wanted anything more to happen. I'm seeing him again in 2 weeks but he'll be here... here being my house with no family, just a couple of flatmates, so a lot more privacy!
 
Same here :D really happy you had a great time!! :D

@Jim, you're bad!
 
My flatmates are out of the house plenty of the times with work and uni, I've got reading week at uni so I'm off. And my bedroom is pretty far from both of theirs. So is fairly private really.
 
Hi ya,
Totally agree with everyone who has said he will not care!!
I've been with the same man for 10 years and I'd never slept with anyone before him as I never felt ready and like you felt really scared about him seeing me without clothes on but honestly hand on heart it didn't enter my mind at all once it came down to it,

He seems like a real decent bloke and if he isn't putting pressure on you he knows how you feel and I bet he doesn't care less, he will love you for you not what you think you look like!!
My bloke is now 23 stone and I still love him, he was about 17 stone when we first met!
Weight really doesn't matter when you are in love!
Good luck with everything x x x
 
No, no update. I haven't seen him since as we live a few hours apart. Next time I'll see him is end of the month, either he'll be here or me there again. So we'll just see how it flows really, no rush or anything. Though I think it'll eventually mean me making the first move as he will just keep waiting for me to be ready.
 
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