Advice...words of wisdom.

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by Spanglyrainbow, 9 October 2008 Social URL.

  1. Spanglyrainbow

    Spanglyrainbow Full Member

    Cambridge Diet
    So, I still haven't found anywhere to get CD in Canada. Everyone in the States I have emailed have said they can't ship outside the US and then when I email the distributors on the official CD website, I get no reply. I have to say I am very unimpressed with the lack of feedback from them...I have emailed 4 times asking for advice. I thought they were a business!!

    Anyway...I am very heartbroken right now. I just need to vent and tell someone else as this is killing me. This morning I received an email from a girl saying that my boyfriend had contacted her asking to hang out etc...saying that I was his ex and he was now single. WE LIVE TOGETHER!!

    Our relationship moved very quickly...when it came to the emotional side of things. I have always been a very sexual person and have a high sex drive...but we weren't having sex. We got on great and the affection etc...and when I asked him why we weren't having sex...he always said it was because he didn't want to rush things...and the emotional side of a relationship is what needed work etc and once you had that things would be the best... I thought that was sweet and that he respected me and that he wanted things to be serious etc.

    After getting this email from this girl..I asked him for the truth. He said he had no intention of meeting her... that he loved me and the emotional side of our relationship was the best he'd ever had...but the reason we haven't had sex is because he isn't physically attracted to me!!! He wants our relationship to work and as soon as the physical attraction is there he said our relationship will be perfect as he thinks I'm a beautiful girl... I asked him what needed to change...he said I had to lose weight...

    I am so hurt and upset by this.... I want to make it work. He's far from slim himself, but I love him for him...not what he looks like...

    I don't know what to think self esteem has been shot. The one person who made me feel beautiful has just made me feel like the ugliest person alive. :cry:

    Thank you for letting me vent..
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  3. amm451

    amm451 Do Over

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    OMG no one deserved to be treated that way. Girl get yourself in hand you need to believe in yourself before anyone else can.... trust me been there. You need to take a day to pamper yourself, evaluate and breathe!
  4. edibeedee

    edibeedee Optifast Girl!

    Dump hi a$$ now! It is not worth it. He does not deserve you. Don't waste another minute of time on him. If that is how he feels move on because when u do lose weight will you be good enough for him then or will he find something else as an excuse?
  5. Spanglyrainbow

    Spanglyrainbow Full Member

    Cambridge Diet
    Thank you so much for the replies...

    I am still heartbroken and feel so self conscious when I am around him now.

    I feel that everytime he looks at's with disgust! :cry:

    My self esteem is so low right now. I have never felt so ugly.

    I really wish I could get back onto CD... but after emailing them again..I did get a reply to say there is nowhere to get it in Canada. :cry::cry:
  6. Snowbaby

    Snowbaby Wants to shed pounds more

    OoOo I am just so angry on your behalf, Spangly!!! From what I can see - you have a gorgeous face with cheekbones to die for. You can get rid of 140lbs worth of useless fat by kicking him to the kerb. He is clearly not worthy of you and you are worth so much more than that :)
  7. flirty40greeneyes

    flirty40greeneyes Busy busy busy!!

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    I'm sitting here in shock/horror that he could say that to you ..... I'm not often lost for words .... but I am at the moment.

    You look beautiful - you are obviously a caring person ... how dare he! As for losing weight for HIM ... don't you dare!!!! You lose weight because YOU want to, and not for any other reason.

    (((HUGS))) to you.
  8. jennikay

    jennikay Gold Member

    Oh hun :( that's an AWFUL thing for him to say, especially when you're so pretty!

    I'm going to agree with everyone and say dump his a** NOW!

    My ex was always VERY reluctant to let me lose weight with anything other than healthy eating and exercise, so I left him (among other reasons, but still :p)

    You don't need someone who puts you down! You deserve better :)

  9. Isis

    Isis Ancient Egypt Nut!

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    I think Bev's put this perfectly!!!

    Lots of love,

    Lacey..xx :)
  10. jennikay

    jennikay Gold Member

    Oh, and, you could probably find CD/The Success Diet on Ebay

    But I didn't tell you that :D

  11. Spanglyrainbow

    Spanglyrainbow Full Member

    Cambridge Diet
    I am so thankful for the response! It means so much to me.

    I really do want to lose weight for me...but feel a VLCD is the only way I will have complete success as I need to see results!

    Been looking on ebay for some...but no luck yet! *sigh*

    Thank you for all the compliments. *blushes*

    As for the man...I just wish my situation was easier haha. I am living with him and he is taking care of me (as I can't legally work here right now). So, he's bringing in the money. I guess I'll make the most of it and exercise and exercise and try and shift as much as I can... maybe I need to turn this around and use this time to get happy in myself.

    It's so hard when I look at it though...for him to support me and take care of me and all the things he is doing for me...I know he must care about me in some way...maybe even love me like he says he does...

    ...but the other side..I am completely heart broken. I believed I was pretty..until yesterday. Now I feel repulsive. I am too self conscious to eat around him now incase he's thinking 'pig'...I managed to pluck up the courage to eat an apple yesterday...I didn't eat anything else. He sat and ate a GIANT bag of crisps and an entire jar of 15 mins...

    Just makes me angry that he wants me to lose weight, yet will sit and eat that sort of stuff in front of me!! :(

    I will be back in the UK for a month over Christmas...was wondering if anyone knew of a way I could get a stash of CD to get a good start...and have a couple of months work to bring back to Canada...
  12. leeds123

    leeds123 Silver Member

    OMG - my hubby HATES it when i lose weight and always says he loves me for who i am and loves everything about me. i don't have too much to lose, but still. your guy is an idiot. don't do CD because of pleasing him cos i will tell it won't work. it has to be for you, and he sounds like a right lardarse himself.

    you look well pretty in your photo.
  13. saraian24

    saraian24 Gold Member

    Slim and Save
    I would be saying bye bye you hypocritical arse!

    My husband wouldnt dream of saying that to me - he tells me I am beautiful everyday and a few mnoths ago i was 252lbs and still said and still found me sexually attractive.

    I cannot believe you are with a guy that makes you feel like that, there are guys that would fall over themselves to ask you out - you are stunning an obviously have beauty inside too.

    You should turn the tables on him and suprisingly find him repulsive and tell him to lose weight - see how it makes him feel!
  14. Spanglyrainbow

    Spanglyrainbow Full Member

    Cambridge Diet
    You guys are awesome! Thanks again.

    So, I have a months worth left of CD...didn't want to use it until I knew I'd have access to it to complete the diet, but that day looks far off haha So, I have decided to use that month and make the most of it and hopefully feel a bit better about myself!

    CD got back to me to say they haven't got any distributors in Canada, but they are working on it - however, it won't happen in the near future! BLAH!

    I am waiting until I have a car again and then I will get some shipped to an address in the States and just cross the border to pick it up haha Sounds like the only option!! Can't wait for that day!!

    Until then...I will be starting my month on CD as of next week sometime!! YAY!

    Love to all and keep up the wonderful work!
  15. susan70

    susan70 Gold Member

    How the hell dare he. Im am stuck for words ( dosnt happen often), every1 has said what I would of said to you so just echoing them all, you are worth 10 of him. you look gorgeous in your pic, has he had his eyes tested lately of his head
  16. Elvira

    Elvira Mistress of the Dark

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    OMG. what a loser. you need to find someone who loves you for who you are hun.

    never ever change yourself for someone else. do it for yourself or not at all xxx
  17. Lostris

    Lostris Serena's title didn't fit

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    Oh my..

    I've seen your pictures in your gallery / album... you look beautiful, you have such a beautiful friendly smiling face how could he say such a horrible thing to you???

    I understand the difficulties; you live with him and I'm quite sure you care about him a lot but NO man should ever treat you like that.

    If you decide to loose weight, do it for you as others have said. Screw him (excuse the language) !!!

    This kinda stuff can make me so mad.

    Good luck with whatever happens but remember you are not unattractive. I'm sure there'd be loads of men who find you attractive.. (not a man myself so can't really tell you from guy's point of view but I think you look gorgeous) your boyfriend is just being a jerk!!

    xxx Lostris
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  19. pink-sarah

    pink-sarah Silver Member

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    1stly, i hope your ok..
    2ndly id get rid of him

    You need to loose weight for you, not him, you , or it just wont work. Love yourself and realise you deserve to be treated better.

    THEN kick him where it hurts! show him what hes missing out on and watch him drool

    good luck xx
  20. Spanglyrainbow

    Spanglyrainbow Full Member

    Cambridge Diet
    You are all so sweet and supportive.

    I am buying a scale tomorrow (well HE is haha). It's quite silly, but I am super excited to be able to see my progress...even though I will no doubt be horrified when I first step on the scale!

    I haven't weighed myself for about 2 months (the longest I have gone without weighing in forever haha). I weighed 250 lbs :cry: then! *sigh* I am kinda dreading the first weigh in...have no clue whether I have put on or lost...but then will look forward to the numbers go down haha

    Who gets excited about getting a scale!?!? WOW...I'm sad! :p

    I will be losing the weight for me...not him. :) Oh the power I have...and I'm going to have even more haha:girlpower:

    Looking forward to my month on CD....hoping I'll figure out a way to get access to more before the month is up!!

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