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Am I going over the top???????????

#1
Hi everyone,

i just wanted to run something by you guys to see if other opinions were the same as mine or if i am completely over reacting!

I went out last night and as per norm, when the babysitter arrived I was gathering my bits together.

I was getting picked up at 8'45 pm by my ex boyfriend and I booked her earlier so i could pop into my neighbour oppersite as shes been low this week, (the babysitter lives at number 31, im at number 29)

so, it was my intention to go see my friend at number 32.

Me number 29
babysitter number 31
friend number 32

so, I mention to the babysitter that im going to number 32 before i get picked up and she said "oh, she's coming here later to keep me company whilst I babysit" so i was suprised as Id seen the woman and shed not said anything to me. So the sitter said "didnt she tell you she was coming over" and i said "no, she didnt "TELL" me" and the sitter said "oh, well she told me she had told you"

so again i went outside where my friend was talking to another neighbour and nothing was said.

so, i went straight out.

When my girls woke up this morning, they told me that not only did my friend come in (the one i was told about) but the neighbour at number 28 came in to to eat her dinner in my house coz she wanted peace and quiet! (she has 2 students in her house, she never has her kids every weekend and she wanted peace and quiet in my house with my 5 kids, a babysitter and my friend!!!!)

I checked my phone, no missed calls, no texts, when i got in nothing was mentioned and this is what I need answered (if anyone has kept up coz its all very confusing!!!)

Am I over the top to think that its totally out of order for these people, who dont normally give me the time of day, other than my friend, to feel that they can come and socialise in MY house without ASKING me first if i minded!!!

So, i have had it out with these neighbours today and I told them all that if it was them, they'd have been just as mad!

theyve all said it was the other person etc etc and i just told them how downright rude it was to just invite themselves into my house.

Now, just before i went out, the mum of the babysitter at number 31 said "oh, you're going out! not having a girly night in then!!!" and i cant help thinking that this was all planned for them to have a girly night in my house without me being there.

I did let rip at these people coz i dont expect to find out from my girls who was in my house!!!

Anyhow, guess who's the bad person!!!! ME!!!

no one can see what the fuss is about, but these are all people that if you knock on there door they wont invite you in but talk to you on the doorstep.

if i had been ASKED i wouldnt have minded so much but its just taking the p*** in my opinion

Sorry to rant for so long, and i hope that it isnt me over reacting

Thanks
Tracie
 
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S: 17st4lb C: 16st11lb G: 11st0lb BMI: 43 Loss: 0st7lb(2.89%)
#2
I don't think you're overreacting: I'd have been pretty darned miffed myself if that had happened! It's your home - not a refuge for any Tom Dick or Harry to socialise in!

As far as you were concerned, you were going out and your girls were being looked after by a babysitter - end of. Like you say - if you'd been consulted and had given it the nod, that would have been a different matter. It's not the actual event that was out of order but the principle. Cheeky mares!

Hope you're feeling a bit calmer today :)
 

KateF

Silver Member
#3
Hecky thumps- that's absolutely out of order! I don't think you're overreacting at all. Your house is your space and people shouldn't be inviting themselves in at random.

Alot of the reason burglaries are so traumatic is because of the sense of invasion people feel as well as what's been taken. I remember once in my rented flat some workmen were sat round my dining room table when I got in from work. It was so surreal and horrible.

The landlady apologised profusely when she realised what had happened from them, and left me a bottle of wine to say sorry-

so I don't think you'r overreacting at all.
Sounds like the babysitter and friend and neighbours all need boundaries making absolutely clear
 
S: 14st2lb C: 12st8lb G: 11st7lb BMI: 24.5 Loss: 1st8lb(11.11%)
#4
Definitely not over reacting, you need to have the overall say about who's in your house, with your children when you're not there.
 
#6
I think it was a real cheek and I would have been just as angry or probably more so.

You definitely did not over react you put your trust in a neighbour to look after your children's safety and quite honestly the trust was abused.

I am sure you know all your neighbours but what if one had decided to bring along a friend who you didn't know?

Lets hope they apologise soon.

Linda
 
#7
hi everyone,

Thanks for your replies and im glad im not alone with my thoughts.

Ive told the babysitter that unless she abides by my rules, then shes no longer going to babysit the girls

Thanks again
Tracie
 

Ivy

Silver Member
#8
Jeez the nerve of some people. you are paying the babysitter to mind your children - not socialise on your time and in your house...

Nope, your right 100%

I'd be fuming also.

Ivy
 

jazzy

Regular Member
#9
You are absolutely right on this one Tracie. Your children are the most precious thing in the world to you and you have chosen someone who you felt responsible enough to look after them. It's not acceptable for her to have let in the others. I wouldn't say you had over reacted at all.

Jazzy x
 
#10
Thanks everyone.

I think ive told the people involved exactly how i feel.

Think they were shocked as im normally very placid!!!

Its just Id never ever dream of doin what they did and I still cant get over that they didnt think anything of it!

Cheers for the advice

Tracie
 
S: 19st5lb C: 18st4.5lb G: 8st8lb BMI: 41.4 Loss: 1st0.5lb(5.35%)
#11
I'm agreeing with you, I don't know if you paid this woman to look after your kids or not but she was there to do a job not socialise with her friends. In this day and age you can't be too careful with who you have around your kids too...
 
#13
I totally agree. No one else should have come in without your permission. And the babysitter was there for only one reason to babysit your children not to have a great time with her friends. You had every reason to be angry. I think i'd be looking for a more reliable babysitter.
Irene xx
 
#14
Hi I think your right too!
I have 3 children and I hate it if people came into my house uninvited by my family without me knowing as theres all sorts of weirdos out there and you never know what there upto when your not there!
I hope you find a trustworthy Babysitter soon!Thats why I dont go out much!
:mad: xxc
 
#15
Yup - I'd be madder than a box of frogs too! As Debbie says - cheeky mares!!!!

But - more importantly, Tracie - has anyone ever told you that you look like Debbie Harry?? I've just seen your pic and think you look gorgeous, girl!!!!

I'm jealous! lol
 
#16
Isobel!!!

I'm laughing my head off here!!!

Its gotta be a conspiracy!

My boyfriend thinks so, and he showed his mates my pic and they all thought so too but i really don't think so at all!

ha ha ha

I'd best go look at photos of her to see (I'm hoping you meant in her younger days and not now! ha ha. isn't she in her 50's or something now. with me being almost 35, i hope you didnt mean as she looks now, although she still does look gr8 for her age !!!!! ha ha ha)

actually, I'm the kinda person that looks really really different in every single picture of me, people always tell me that no two pictures are alike of me!

maybe the camera was being kind to me that day

thanks very much though, you've made my day!:D

Tracie
xxx xxx
 
#18
Isobel!!!

I'm laughing my head off here!!!

Its gotta be a conspiracy!

My boyfriend thinks so, and he showed his mates my pic and they all thought so too but i really don't think so at all!

ha ha ha

I'd best go look at photos of her to see (I'm hoping you meant in her younger days and not now! ha ha. isn't she in her 50's or something now. with me being almost 35, i hope you didnt mean as she looks now, although she still does look gr8 for her age !!!!! ha ha ha)

actually, I'm the kinda person that looks really really different in every single picture of me, people always tell me that no two pictures are alike of me!

maybe the camera was being kind to me that day

thanks very much though, you've made my day!:D

Tracie
xxx
you look just like her
xxc
 


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