Calling BL.....
- Thread starter x-Katie-x
- Start date
Blonde Logic
Yes. You can.
Hi Katie
I'm here. I'm 'ok'. Just really struggling with my neck at the moment. It's been really emotional, and I just feel like all I do is moan. I have not taken my diagnosis well at all. But its so bloooody painful - and I actually have a very high tolerance for pain - but this is really getting me. It's more a mental trip I think, because now that I know I can't be 'cured', and they can't fix it - the pain seems much more intolerable then it has for the past 11 months. Every time I move my neck at all, all I hear is crunching and grinding in my neck, and I just keep seeing my xray, and know that its my bones crushing my nerves and wearing away. Its a horrible sound, and I can't get away from it, or block it out. Its just "right there". I have just found this all terribly depressing, if I am honest. I'm struggling with the pain meds. They are quite strong on an almost empty stomach. I am waiting with baited breath for a physio referal as I am sure that will bring some relief. But now, I just cannot find any relief. At all. And I am tired of hurting. :cry:And I am pissed that is been making me cry. Grrrr. That's how I know I am at the end of my tether.
I think what it amounts too, is for the past 11 months I have used mental power to get through it - always believing it would be sorted. I am also using massive amount of mental power to stay focused on the diet and get through it. I think I have just run out of mental strength and the pain has finally won through.
It's just really got me down. And I feel like all I do is moan, so best not to open mouth or people will get sick of hearing me.
I know I will snap out of this, I am resilient - but for now, it appears to have won this round of the battle.
I'm home again today - might be off and on, though will probably be spending a good deal of time in a hot bath or laying down. But I'm around, lurking if nothing else.
Thanks Katie. Appreciate your looking out for me. <hugs>
xx
Hope you too are feeling better and less sore today then yesterday.
I'm here. I'm 'ok'. Just really struggling with my neck at the moment. It's been really emotional, and I just feel like all I do is moan. I have not taken my diagnosis well at all. But its so bloooody painful - and I actually have a very high tolerance for pain - but this is really getting me. It's more a mental trip I think, because now that I know I can't be 'cured', and they can't fix it - the pain seems much more intolerable then it has for the past 11 months. Every time I move my neck at all, all I hear is crunching and grinding in my neck, and I just keep seeing my xray, and know that its my bones crushing my nerves and wearing away. Its a horrible sound, and I can't get away from it, or block it out. Its just "right there". I have just found this all terribly depressing, if I am honest. I'm struggling with the pain meds. They are quite strong on an almost empty stomach. I am waiting with baited breath for a physio referal as I am sure that will bring some relief. But now, I just cannot find any relief. At all. And I am tired of hurting. :cry:And I am pissed that is been making me cry. Grrrr. That's how I know I am at the end of my tether.
I think what it amounts too, is for the past 11 months I have used mental power to get through it - always believing it would be sorted. I am also using massive amount of mental power to stay focused on the diet and get through it. I think I have just run out of mental strength and the pain has finally won through.
It's just really got me down. And I feel like all I do is moan, so best not to open mouth or people will get sick of hearing me.
I know I will snap out of this, I am resilient - but for now, it appears to have won this round of the battle. I'm home again today - might be off and on, though will probably be spending a good deal of time in a hot bath or laying down. But I'm around, lurking if nothing else.
Thanks Katie. Appreciate your looking out for me. <hugs>
xx
Hope you too are feeling better and less sore today then yesterday.
shazzy1973
Member
BL
Hiya, not sure what is wrong - but read the post and it seems pretty bad BL....Nothing worse than being in pain, sending lots of positive vibes your way xx
Hiya, not sure what is wrong - but read the post and it seems pretty bad BL....Nothing worse than being in pain, sending lots of positive vibes your way xx
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