Do you tell people about Exante?

Discussion in 'Exante' started by GetFitGirl, 2 September 2010 Social URL.

  1. GetFitGirl

    GetFitGirl Full Member

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    Having been on many diets over the years, and having short-lived success with some and no success with others, my friends and family are well used to me "being on a diet".

    The trouble is, because I've got such a bad track record, I try not to tell anyone I'm trying to lose weight, because I always think, for me, it piles on the pressure.

    I started Exante on Tuesday this week and because my (super slim) husband has been decorating the house after work, he doesn't even know I'm doing it. I'm not looking forward to telling him because I know he'll be thinking "here we go again"! My children know, because I'm not constantly chomping as I normally do, and my 12 year old son keeps saying that I'm lovely as I am (training to be a real charmer, I think).

    I work in a school and we go back next week. I would normally sit in the staff room at lunch time munching away happily on sarnies and general junk like everyone else does.

    What I can't decide is whether to avoid having anything to eat in front of anyone until the weight loss begins to show, when I could perhaps "come clean", or whether to tough it out from the start. I can't help but wonder if I'm going to get disapproval or pity from some others at work, though.

    How does anyone else manage?
     
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  3. poogatch

    poogatch Full Member

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    I tend to tell the people I would normally share that kind of information with from the get go. Work colleagues I just wait until it fits into a conversation, I find so long as I speak about it like it's normal and answer any general questions it works fine. Don't try and defend it just explain if they are interested.

    I've allways found my friends and family where supportive I was trying to fix the problem rather than judge :)
     
  4. GetFitGirl

    GetFitGirl Full Member

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    Thanks, that's good to know. You're so right about not trying to defend what you're doing. I must admit, I think I would be tempted to say that losing weight this way is a hell of a lot better than not losing it at all!

    I guess at the end of the day what I need to do is stick to it and prove anyone who criticises wrong.
     
  5. babystar31

    babystar31 Gold Member

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    Ive now told all my family and close friends but yeah i have no shame in telling people. I wouldnt dream of telling others how to diet so i tell people and if they dont like it...well they dont have to haha
     
  6. GetFitGirl

    GetFitGirl Full Member

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    Good for you!

    My mum's the worst one for me, bless her! I'm sort of dreading the AAM week because her favourite question when I'm trying to lose weight is "should you be eating that?". Mind you, I might not even tell her I'm doing this. If she asks if I've lost weight I might just say no, I don't think so!
     
  7. Lisaberry

    Lisaberry Silver Member

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    Oh I'll tell anyone that will listen!!!
    At work it's fine anyway... My boss is doing LL, when I told my friend I was doing this she signed up too and now another 2 girls I work with have signed up to LL. The only person who thinks I'm silly is the girl at work who is a size 4 (and never shuts up about it)

    I see it as the more people who know, the more likely I'm going to stick at it as it's people thinking I couldn't hack it that I wouldn't like!
     
  8. GothicLolita

    GothicLolita Full Member

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    I haven't said anything to anyone. My husband would be disapproving, although he dieted this year. He lost 4 stone through willpower & exercise the annoying thing about his diet was that he started Christmas week, thus making me feel so guilty when every morsel passed my lips but that did not stop me none the less!!! My husband’s ethos is simply eat less move more, my mother the size 6 lady just will tell me to do more house work & go for a “nice brisk walk” & I’ll shed the pounds.
    I too work in a school we’re very small so I’ve no staff room to contend with. The weekends are hard to disguise but so far no one noticed. The only solace I have here is reading other people posts here cos I feel no one in my inner circle would understand. I also feel my friends want be as the fat friend to make themselves feel better & would try to dissuade me from continuing or try to sabotage my efforts. Ok now lunch time over now. Gotta work.
     
  9. GetFitGirl

    GetFitGirl Full Member

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    Thanks Lisaberry, you did make me smile.

    And Orlaie, your husband sounds exactly like mine. He's lovely, but is 6"1 and under 13 stone, so he has no concept of being overweight. If he's feeling a bit chubby (how, I don't know) he will just go for a run and the weight drops off and stays off. Mind you, he is far more energetic and sporty than me anyway.

    I think you may be right about friends, too. Mine neither encourage nor discourage me, but I'm sure it makes their life more comfortable to have me as the fat friend. Wow, deep stuff here!

    I, too, love it on here because it makes me realise there are other people in the same boat (though if there were too many my weight the boat would not be a good place to be!).

    I'm dead impressed that you can conceal the Exante goodies at the weekend. Think I will blow my cover then!
     
  10. GothicLolita

    GothicLolita Full Member

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    Well GetFitGirl my husband had a hangover on Saturday so was out of sight. Sunday he was playing golf. I'm trying to get him to go out with his co-workers this Friday again. By the time I finish this he'll have a drink problem!!
     
  11. kas getting slimmer

    kas getting slimmer Gold Member

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    GetFitGirl, I am in a similar dilema. I started Exante today and have never done a VLCD before so don't know how well i'll be able to stick it.

    I have told my hubby and minimins friends but no one in the real world. Have 28 days supply so was hoping to continue the whole of September doing TFR but now my pal has decided to come up next weekend with her hubby and kids and my parents-in-law want to come up for a week at the end of September so i can't really hide it.

    Don't really want to come clean as i can't be bother with the disapprovement's and the i told you so's.
     
  12. GetFitGirl

    GetFitGirl Full Member

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    Oh no, Kas, that's a really hard one. I think I'd probably do it until your friends arrive and see how you get on. If it's working for you, you could tell them how well it's going and carry on. If the week hasn't been as brilliant as you would have hoped, you could cut your losses and wait until the in-laws have been.

    Why don't you persevere until at least the weekend your friends are coming, by which time you will have done over a week and may be in the groove! Having just looked at the calendar, you would be in your Add A Meal week when the in-laws came, which might make things easier to deal with.

    No matter whether people approve or disapprove, the bottom line is it's better to lose weight in any way that suits you (not them) and it's far better for you than not losing it all. Would they really not want you to become healthier and happier? If they make negative comments, ask them just that!
     
  13. Lisaberry

    Lisaberry Silver Member

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    Most of the people I know who had reservations at first have changed their minds as they have seen the weight come off... 1 person has started because of me and another 2 are seriously considering it!

    I definitely think I would have given up by now if people didn't know I was doing this! Since my BMI hit 25 I've been finding it much harder not to think 'sod it' and to go to SW but then I keep thinking about how I tell everyone at work I quit before I wanted to and it makes me plough on!

    This diet has really made me realise how much my social life depends on eating and drinking....if I want to keep this weight off I have to change that! I'm a terrible drunk and a whingey cow when fat so it's definitely for the best!
     
  14. Lisaberry

    Lisaberry Silver Member

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    Oh and Once when someone told me that my diet wasn't healthy I whipped out a shake sachet and started reeling off the vitamins and minerals and asking them where in their diet they could be sure they were getting the rda of each. This was the size 4 girl at work who eats junk galore and really annoys me! Made me feel better!!
     
  15. GetFitGirl

    GetFitGirl Full Member

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    I work with someone like that too. She's nearly 50, a size 8, has the most appalling diet but is very critical and intolerant of others and has a sharp tongue, too. I'm mentally polishing up my answers to any "comments" she has to make. :p
     
  16. GothicLolita

    GothicLolita Full Member

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    People just begrudge others success & happiness. Well I’m Irish & we’re kinda accepting of begrudgery. I truly believe if I tell people they’ll want to see me fail @ this & enjoy my failure, so I’m def keeping silent on this. Luckily I do not have colleagues. People are just mean.
     
  17. Lisaberry

    Lisaberry Silver Member

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    BUT...you're not going to fail so all they will see is your amazing success!!!
     
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  19. GetFitGirl

    GetFitGirl Full Member

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    Some people quote great philosphers, but I quote Thumper the rabbit (says it all really :)) "If you can't say something nice, then don't say nothing at all!". Do you know, I just love that. I just wish more people would live by those wise words!

    And no, I can't fail this time. After three days I finally confessed to my husband this mornng and he was great. Very calm, no rolling of the eyes and no "here we go again"!
     
  20. GothicLolita

    GothicLolita Full Member

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    Thanks. No I know I will not fail cos I look at my wedding picture very evening & it kinda taunts me. I was a natural 8 for my wedding. I was lucky I did not need to diet up to now. Anyway I look at the photo and I know I'll get back into my clothes soon. Just wondering though if this is going to work for me as I am very run down today. Woke up with two monster cold sores, plus terrible dark circles under my eyes. Have not had a cold sore in years, so ugly. Boo hoo.
     
  21. short and dumpy

    short and dumpy We are Flab-ou-Less!

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    The longer I have been on the diet the less it bothers me if people know.

    I think being up front in a situation where you are observed eating might in the long term be a good thing, as it stops any situations of being offered food etc and declining.

    The issue with being up front is that you have to be fore armed with come backs.

    I've had the odd few comments of it being faddy, unhealthy or the funniest "the easy option". Hmmmm, yep, right!! The main consensus was that if you eat a nice calorie controlled diet and exercise then you will lose any weight you want to off and if you didn't lose weight that way you were cheating

    This diet is HARD.. but we are all informed on it. We know that we are filling our bodies with goodness and the nutrients it needs.. I have more vitamins and minerals now than I ever did...like I said in another post, its eye opening, as I am starting to see food very differently. Not as a emotional comforter, not as a detested evil ting to avoid, but as fuel. This diet is enabling me to 'start again'. Once the weight drops, I will be able to go out and have an evening meal with a sexy man.. if I can find one hehhe and pick options I know are good... but best of all enjoy it. It will be second nature..

    its like a weighing scale.. weighing up the options, being morbidly obese (which i was!) or doing a diet that could increase my years of life and quality of life!

    People do sometimes throw at you the ''you will put it all back on when you stop''
    some put the weight on, yes, but many many many many do not.. we just need to look at the inspiration threads on the forum or the before and after pictures, and our more experienced exantes that pop in and check on us every now and again.

    There are reasons people might put the weight back on, emotional, or even not coming to terms with portion sizes, but I truly believe if we are motivated enough to stick to this diet, we will be more than motivated to keep it off! I love love love this little thread http://www.minimins.com/very-low-cal...out-vlcds.html (Debunking the myth about VLCD's)

    I find a lady on these forums called KD so inspirational and rather witty and wise
    to be honest... friends are either jealous as they know you will shrink before their eyes, or have no idea where you get so much inner strength from... i can understand some people not being informed about it, but belatently trying to demotivate is one of the worst things.

    maka says
    me personally, i have recently told my family, as i visited them and had too...but, to a wider extent, this is a little secret.. I am not ashamed of what I am doing.. far far from it. I just think I got myself into this mess, I have to get myself out of it. Others have no right to judge what I put in my mouth, fat or thin or in training to be thin. (thanks Magggie.. stole the training bit hehe )

    I would never dream of telling someone eating that mayo sauce or whatever is dangerous. Why should someone else have the right to do that to me

    I am extremely proud to be on this diet and of all you lot on this forum. the reason I keep it quiet is because its my journey not theirs.
     
  22. angie-bum

    angie-bum Gold Member

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    I did tell people the last time I was on a vlcd because I was outed by a colleague who had started it the same time and gave up after a week. I got the usual ' just eat less and move more' crappy advice. I got' I know someone who did ll and they put it all back on eating tubs of ice-cream'

    I am not telling people this time, but I am in the lucky position of being on maternity leave and not watched by others how I chose to eat.

    It was much much harder when I was at work, people always have food kicking around to offer you, there is always someones birthday or leaving do, no it's much easier this time.

    I have been asked what I am doing this time I said it was a milkshake for breakfast soup for lunch and chicken or fish with salad or veg for tea (I am still occasionally breastfeeding so am having extra). They said oh, like following the slim fast diet, I said yeah something like that.

    Honestly, if I was asked by someone who really wanted to lose weight, I would tell them.
    However if It's just a noisy acquaintance or someone you know is being *****y, I would either side step the issue or lie. Everyone has got an opinion, even if they know nothing about vlcds. You don't want people sowing seeds of doubt about the diet, because when you are feeling weak willed, what you want to remember is that the diet is safe and works and provides all the nutrients you need, not some half baked myth someone has spouted, based on the tabloid press

    It breaks lots of taboos when you do not use food socially, accepting hospitality, sharing drinks and food. It's only when you stop eating that you realise that so many people use food as a primary form of entertainment. The last time I did this I grew my nails long and had lots of long baths instead lol!
     
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