Feeling a bit deflated by it all

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Jo B, 30 July 2009 Social URL.

  1. Jo B

    Jo B Full Member

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    I am probably going to sound ungrateful now, for wish I apologise. The last few weeks my weight loss has dropped off - I know it's still more than a lot of people (and that's where the ungratefulness comes in) and it is to be expected as I get smaller I need less calories to move me around but tonight, for the first time, I just felt a bit sick of it all. It's difficult to explain but I think I am hitting a bit of a mental wall for the first time. Whether it's because I am now 12 stone 12 which I NEVER thought I would be and yet I am still quite hideously fat underneath my clothes. Apparently I only have 1 stone 5lbs to lose before I hit a healthy BMI but there is no way on gods earth it can only be that as my stomach is still a mass of blubber.
    Up until now I have been lucky and have pretty much sailed through mentally with cooking and hearing about other lapsing in my group not effecting me in the slightest but this evening someone had had 2 boiled eggs and still lost more than me - which really hacked me off. I don't know if I am bored of the packs (possibly), bored of the diet in general or bored of it just taking over and dictating everything in my life (also possible). I've been off sick at home for the last couple of days and have been bored and fantasising about food which I don't think has helped but I think I am feeling sorry for myself. I know there is nothing that anyone else can do to help but needed to put it all down I think - rant over!
     
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  3. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Aw Jo, hang in there. DOn;t forget, this is all temporary - and that you are zooming in on being done. You and I are the same heigth, so I kind of know where you might be about now - another stone, which won;t take long, and that tummy is going to surprise you.

    Don;t let it dictate your life - incorporate it into your life. It shouldn';t stop you from doing anything etc. :)

    Being home ill does not help I am sure. While you are home getting better, jhust have some lovely day dreams about all the lovely new clothes you are going to have, and your new slim body. Celebrate the fact that you are not eating boiled eggs (shame on them for discussing it!) and that you therefore are getting more for your money and learning properly, where they are not. So their losses now, will probably turn into gains later - where your hard work, blood sweat and tears, will more likely put you in good stead for a slim life, forever.

    Hang in there. :)

    x
     
  4. slendablenda

    slendablenda Gold Member

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    Don't worry Jo

    :flowers:You'll get through this blip. I'm sure you are feeling like this because you are sick.
    Your mental stamina gets depleted as well as your physical strength when you are not well.
    Stick with it. It sounds as though you are doing so well.
    12 stone, that's fabulous. From now on the weight loss seems even more dramatic as you have less to lose.
    Try not to compare yourself with the others in your group. Everyone's experience is different.
    One thing's for sure. If you persevere you will succeed. Honestly. Good luck.
    HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER SOON.
    Let us know how you get on.
     
  5. Jo B

    Jo B Full Member

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    Thanks guys, I know you're right, I know that I won't eat until I decide it is the right time - I can't be doing with lapsing, it's just pointless. I think I might feel better about it all if my stomach shrunk! I know it has from looking at my before and after foundation photos but when I see it uncovered it just looks too hideous. I think because that is where pretty much ALL my weight is (I have the skinniest legs, especially now, and my arms aren't that big) I look at it and see the fat person I was. Also, this "wall" has come out of the blue, last week I was fine. I also still find it difficult to come to terms with the size I was as my brain says "surely after losing over 5 stone, I should be think" - nope not yet. This is where the horrible realisation about what I did to myself hits home, if only I hadn't put on 2.5 stone in 6 months I would be well on the way on RTM and the whole thing would have been so much easier. Ah well, no-one to blame but myself!
     
  6. daisydoll

    daisydoll Gold Member

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    hi there
    don't give up, you are doing fab.
    i know where you are coming from - i can't stand the sight of my 'new' body with no clothes on. it looks gross.
    my arms are saggy, my boobs are saggy - and don't even get me started on my stomach and inside thighs

    i'm actually more self concious when undressed or in swimwear than when i was 4.5 stone larger

    However.....
    i feel so much fitter, i can run
    and at the end of the day i wear clothes 99% of the time, and i would far rather be size 8 than 18!

    im gutted that my body isn't gorgeous underneath, but hopefully with time and with excercise(when i can be bothered) it will improve a bit.

    i bought a lovely negligee/basque thing from ann summers which hides my tum nicely and puts my boobs back in the right place - so its not all doom and gloom!

    after 15 weeks it does start to get a bit boring maybe, but stick with it...it really is worth it

    daisy x
     
  7. lucylastic

    lucylastic Silver Member

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    Hi Jo

    I had exactly the same thoughts about it all, at around the same time in the programme as you are now - it's like you reach the threshold of your tolerance and feel it's all just too much.

    I really struggled for a couple of days, but then it all clicked back, and I know it will for you too. I'm not sure there's too much you can do apart from ride it out, but it does pass.

    I recently started struggling again and have now moved on to RTM although I am still 5lbs from goal. For me I know that's right, I knew I was in danger of sabotaging my good work if I didn't change - can't explain it really, it was like my body just telling me it was time. May have been because I had stepped up the exercise dramatically, not sure.

    Anyway - do want you can to make it easier on yourself - keep trying on all those great new clothes that you wouldn;t have got anywhere near you when you started, keep looking at photos before you started and compare them with now, keep pampering yourself with lovely treats like bubble baths and pedicures, and most of all keep reminding yourself what you have achieved - it's phenomenal! I totally empathise with your feelings about your stomach, mine is utterly revolting, however sometimes even that makes me smile, as it proves what I've done in a strange way, and I think it will get better over time, as yours will.

    Keep your chin up, you've done amazingly :) x
     
  8. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    <<<<<<<<<<Huge Hug>>>>>>>>>

    Jo, I completely understand your feelings here - went through that an awful lot on the diet.

    Please don't beat yourself up.

    The way I see it, what we did, and what we endured, and what we experienced as fat people, is what makes us who we are today. It gives us a certain strength really, being able to look back and see what we did to ourselves is very upsetting. But, seeing us pull ourselves up and out of that is also very empowering and enriching.

    Hang in there hon - don't beatyourself up. Look forward, not backward, and be rpoud of what your adoing to yousefl now.

    XX
     
  9. Morticia

    Morticia Happy in my own skin

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    Hey Jo, hope you're feeling better today.

    I did not lose the weight off of my tummy until right at the end. I worried I would end up looking thin and gaunt with still a bit of a tummy....but thankfully it's starting to shrink now.
     
  10. Minerva

    Minerva ...passing through.

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    The tummy is the last to go to be honest... Hopefully you're feeling much better in yourself and the illness is lifting. :) There are many hormonal changes that can happen with weight-loss, so emotionality is common...
    As for the tummy issue... well. To me, looking down upon it, it still looks the same at 9st 3, as it did at 18st 7. Looking in the mirror it definitely is the last part which annoys me - however, you have to remember that we have a very skewed perception of ourselves. I have to keep reminding myself that every day and try not to think about my belly flab! Lol. Because in the grand scheme of things: flat stomachs are an illusion! All the magazine photos of celebrities have been photoshopped, so... never rely on them for a true image of beauty.

    ;)

    Keep going, you're doing brilliantly!
     
  11. Jo B

    Jo B Full Member

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    Thanks guys - feel a bit better about it all today but still have an underlying feeling of "meh". Thinking about it all, I think I am bored generally. My OH is poorly now and so I've been looking after him (men ill are not fun to be around!) and I just feel restless, that coupled with being couped up at home for a couple of days I think has driven me slightly stir crazy. So, tonight as a last resort to keep me busy I am going to do some ironing!
    Like I said last night I have no intention of lapsing and will continue onwards. I might suggest (if it's raining and grim again tomorrow) that we go for a bit of a shop so I can try on more, small clothes!
     
  12. thin_inside

    thin_inside I Can Do This!

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    Hi Jo

    I know exactly what you mean. In Foundation my average loss was over 4lbs per week, in the second 14 weeks my losses have averaged 2.5lb per week and if I took the last eight weeks it would be less than that. It is frustrating and I went through a very similar stage as you a few weeks back. Hang in there - we WILL get to goal, but I have already adjusted my head to acknowledge it is going to be a longer abstinence phase than I had initially worked to.

    On the tummy front it is now where I also carry a lot of my remaining weight although my legs are more tree trunk than svelt - so appreciate your lovely slim legs! I'm sure your tummy will disappear as you lose the remaining pounds to your target.

    My tum is all floppy, but I'm happy with that :p. I might consider a boob job in the distant future though - to lift and equalise :eek:. xx
     
  13. thin_inside

    thin_inside I Can Do This!

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    Good idea about the shopping! Real feel good factor in picking the smaller sizes and fitting into them.

    I hope you and hubby are fully fit again very soon.
     
  14. Jo B

    Jo B Full Member

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    strange isn't it - it's as if our bodies know that Foundation is over and now it's the slog to RTM!
     
  15. Guy

    Guy Likes to lurk

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    Remember what Winston said. 'If you're going though hell, keep going!' :)
     
  16. thin_inside

    thin_inside I Can Do This!

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    Hi Guy - how's things? Are you coping with maintenance OK? I remember you had difficulty in stopping the weight loss :). Let us know what your strategy is....
     
  17. Morticia

    Morticia Happy in my own skin

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    Hey Jo, shopping is good, as is trying on those smaller sizes. I've been making that my pastime and only buying about a 10th of what I try on...but it's good fun...:D
     
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  19. sukie sue

    sukie sue this is My time to shine!

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    love to shop , just discovered a new sport zara shopping in different countries :0) woo hoo !!!
     
  20. ThinDilema

    ThinDilema Full Member

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    Get you trying on all those smaller sizes!! :D

    Keep up the amazing work babes, just remeber you body works in facinating ways and you may have odd loses sometimes :)

    Lovesyou
    xxxx
     
  21. Jo B

    Jo B Full Member

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    Had a quick look in Primani this morning - god I hate the sizing in that shop! Tried on an 18 shirt and it was too small, my advice, don't try anything on in there unless you are a size 10 everywhere else!
     
  22. ThinDilema

    ThinDilema Full Member

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    I do love primarni for bags and stuff but clothes are shocking!!!

    I remeber when i was a size 12 jeans and still their jeans were too small even in a 16 yet i could wear a size 12 topshop and riverisland jeans!!

    Bring Primarni DOWN!!! stupid sizing company!!

    hahahaa :D
     
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