Feeling really sad :-(

Discussion in 'Strugglers and Restarters' started by littlestars, 6 August 2011 Social URL.

  1. littlestars

    littlestars Member

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    Hello everyone, i haven't been on here for a while now but the way i am feeling i felt like i just needed to air my feelings with people who will know how i feel and hopefully give me some advice.

    Currently i am 30 years old, a mother of 4 boys and a wife to lovely hubby, on top of being a student nurse. I have god gradually bigger over the years and i am now about 13st 8lbs and a size 18.

    I hate being fat. I hate having two bellies, a big bum and wobbly arms and chunky legs :cry:I recently went out for a night out with my friends and although i did look pretty i also looked fat and i felt sad that i couldn't wear the clothes i really wanted too because of my size. I hate going clothes shopping because i just look awful in all the modern clothes and i end up in frumpy old fashioned stuff.

    My mum has recently lost over 2 stones and has gone from an 18 to a 14 in about 8 months, my hubby has also just lost 2 stone...this made me feel really sad tonight, not because i am jealous, but because i can't understand why when we eat the same and a both active he has lost weight and i haven't! I feel ugly, disgusting and ashamed of what i have become and its not fair for my husband to have a wife who has let herself go.

    I also need to have some nasty Varicose veins removed on my leg and so i am very self concious about these and won't wear anything that shows my legs off at all, but until i lose weight there is no point in having the operation.

    I Have tried weight watchers (but i get board with the counting!) and i just can't get into slimming world. I just want to eat healthy like i have been doing. I have cut out the cakes and biscuits i used to eat loads of and just have a bit of chocolate now and again to fight off the need to go back to eating everything and anything sweet!
    I don't know what to do :-( i just can't cope any more :-( :cry:
     
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  3. bin59

    bin59 Full Member

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    Hi Littlestars,
    Sorry to hear you are feeling so sad, I hope after writing it all down on here you feel better,it is good to let your frustration out rather than keep it to yourself.
    Look at the positives, you have taken the step to decide yes I am going to lose weight, you have 4 boys and a lovely hubby who love you because you are you, you also have a good group of friends to go out with.
    You say that your hubby has lost weight even though you eat the same and exercise the same, men can eat more, I find it so annoying my hubby and I are doing WW I am allowed 29 points and he is allowed 49, so you may find it helps to have smaller portions than him. Also drink plenty of water. Women put weight on in different places to men which I am sure is harder to shift especially around bum thighs and midriff (I hate my muffin top!)
    You may find it helps to write everything you eat down it helps me, stops me forgetting about that odd biscuit I had with a cup of coffe.:D
    I know how you feel about keeping your legs covered I have psoriasis so wear trousers all the time.
    You are not alone we are all in this together so keep smiling Littlestars and good luck with your weight loss let us know how you get on :) xx
     
  4. txgardenia

    txgardenia Full Member

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    Have you gone to the GP to get your thyroid levels checked? Many people cannot lose weight if their thyroid is low.

    If you are insulin resistant, then you should do a low carb or no carb diet (this is what doctors recommend). Symptoms of insulin resistance can be found online. That can also prevent you from losing weight normally.

    If you have a naturally slow metabolism then doing exercise videos with resistance bands or light weights will help build muscle and over time your body will burn more calories even when you're not working out. It can be so frustrating when everyone around you is losing weight and you're not... believe me, i know! hugs for you.
     
  5. Emmaline

    Emmaline Hippety Hop!

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    Hi Littlestar, Sorry to see that you are feeling so down about things but I am sure you will find great help and support on this fab forum.

    Do get a dairy started so that we know where to find you and can see how you are progressing and give you encouragement as well.

    It sounds to me like you need to give yourself some time of your own and have a bit of pampering. With four boys and being a student nurse that must make for quite a hectic life.

    Do hope that you feel a bit brighter soon and getting into a healthier eating programme will make you feel much better in itself. Also go along and have your thyroid checked as I too felt that it may be at the root of your problem.

    All the very best to you...and don't give up, we are all rooting for you ... :)
     
  6. littlestars

    littlestars Member

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    Thank you for being so nice and giving me some advice. I had recorded my weight on my pc way back in February and have realised that since then i have lost 12lbs, it's been extremely slow going but i definitely think that is due to my slow metabolism as i really don't pig out on food and i am fairly active although i haven't been doing much cardio or toning!
    I did have my thyroid check last year as i was convinced it was that but it was within normal parameters :-/
    I don't want to do some fad diet or go to a slimming club because i know that i will just give up, i think i just need to find something that i love doing exercise wise and continue to eat a healthy balanced diet, i could probably do with some vit b12 too to help boost my energy levels.
    I am still feeling disgusted with myself though, i went shopping with my mum today and she was buying lovely clothes and i just felt sick to the stomach that i was walking around in clothes that make me feel huge and ugly :-(
    I used to always feel happy about myself but more and more now i just feel repulsed and my self esteem is in my boots. I have to deal with this now.
     
  7. Emmaline

    Emmaline Hippety Hop!

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    Well, it may be slow, Littlestars, but at least it's going down!
    Doo hope you will find something that suits you soon and hope you will continue to post regularly so we can see how you are doing.
    :hug99:
     
  8. joolyliss

    joolyliss Full Member

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    Hi there, we are v similar, i am 30 in a couple of weeks, have 2 kids and im also a student nurse! I have found it very hard to lose weight since starting uni a year and a half ago and have crept up to 12 stone - not good for 5ft 2!! Im am starting slimming world tomorrow so hopefully can start shifting some weight! Good luck dont be sad! Just start again xxx

    Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
     
  9. marsipan

    marsipan Full Member

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    Keep going... only you really understand where you are starting from and what you are doing to reach your goals. I'm going to keep an eye on your story and pray it goes well for you. x
     
  10. 2manycupcakes

    2manycupcakes Full Member

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    Hi LittleStars, I know exactly how you are feeling, my mum has lost 10 stone over the last year and is slowly getting nearer to my current weight, shes even asking for the clothes I cant get into once she looses more weight... I've ballooned since starting uni, i'm also a student nurse. I hope you can find your way out of this, as do I.... Maybe we can motivate each other?
    Good luck and try and stay positive :)
     
  11. lass321

    lass321 Gold Member

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    Hoping you have begun to feel a little more positive. You can do this if you want to. I agree with the food diary thing, and also consider if you have a food intolerance like wheat or lactose. Perhaps a low carb diet would be good - as i believe the results are faster - though normal chocolate would be out for that. Whatever you decide I wish you all the best.
     
  12. LittleSis

    LittleSis Silver Member

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    Have you signed up for My Fitness Pall? A lot of us use it to keep track of what we're eating..

    You've got a lot on your plate at the moment (no pun intended)..So just go for baby steps.. I was going to suggest you have your thyroid checked but I see you've had that done :|

    Keep a diary on here and we can all support you and say well done when the weight starts to fall off :)

    Good luck.
     
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