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Feeling, well... crap

#1
What a difference a day makes, eh? Yesterday I had a really great day--thanks to all of those who posted on my birthday thread. It was great to see all your comments.

Today, well, I knew it might have happened, but still, knowing for sure that I failed the exam I took a couple of weeks ago hurts like hell.

I'm sitting here, not quite knowing what to do with myself. I feel so disappointed with myself-and like I've let everyone else down. But the worst thing is that I texted my best friend, my Dad and my sister to tell them I failed and haven't heard back from any of them. Not one solitary word. Bad enough that I failed, it feels even worse that no one cares. I worked so bloody hard--and for what?

And I have to confess, I don't quite know what to do with myself. Ordinarily, I'd stuff my face with pizza, or get drunk--and I don't want to do either of those things--because that'll only make things worse. I'm sitting here in danger of electrocuting myself because I'm crying all over the keyboard--and I don't know how to stop.

I can retake the exam, but really can't face the thought of doing it all again right now. I just want to put up my white flag and surrender.

Sorry for the depressing post--I just had to spew it all out somewhere...
 
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#2
Hiya

The people who suceed most in life are those that fail and then get straight back up!

And next time you take the exam and pass it you will look back and feel proud that you had the balls to take it again and you will suceed.

Don't let this upset you, use it to motivate you!

Mike
 
#3
Oh dear Lily, your post is so touching me too. I had a little surgery in the hospital today and no one of my family called how i'm doing. My little girl gave me a beatiful christmas piece when i came home.....she made that with her grandmother. This brought me almost to tears because such a gesture is so much more worth than my family who are only busy living their own lives.

Listen to the words of icemoose........he is so right. Straighten your back and let them see what you can do!

Hugs
botozi
 
#4
too tru with the above posts .you can re sit it and carry on. you go girl ...... and lets face it these days exams seem to have no relevance to the course we do !!!( i remember them vaguely when i was student nurse ) they didnt teach me how to be a nurse . complete bloody waste of time .
dont feel to dispondant , you will succeed .
big hugs
 
#5
Thank you for your posts. I know you're right, but this will be the second time this year I've had to pick myself up and do it all again. I failed an exam in the summer--which yes, I passed at the second attempt--I know it's possible. But while I was revising for the retake, I had to study the stuff for the next exam at the same time--and never really got my head around it. The retake for the exam I've just done is in February. There'll be another exam in May--again, the new stuff will have to be learned alongside revising the old stuff.

I'm exhausted. My brain's fried! I've already spent a solid 6 months this year revising. That is to say, every night, hitting the books for 2-3 hours and all weekend. It's taking over my life. Moreover, it's not fair on my OH or my 11 year old son--they've been great, but they've had enough of watching me burn myself out like this.

Unfortunately, unlike nursing exams (which I agree were indeed a waste of time, Sue--I've been there, got the T-shirt!), I have to pass these exams in order to do my job. The only option left is to drop back a year and join the group the year below me--which is looking like the best thing to do right now. But that'll mean saying goodbye to all the people I've become good friends with over the last 2 and a half years and starting new relationships with those in the year below.

All definitely do-able, I know that. But today, I'm grieving for what might've been. The pass mark was 70%. I got 66%
 
#6
I don't post on here often, but couldn't read without replying!

I was in my placement year at uni and I had failed an accounting exam in the previous year. I had to resit it the following year, aswell as working full time doing something totally unrelated. The thought of sitting down to the books killed me every time... But, like you, I had to pass it to get into my final year.. It was hell, so I know how you are feeling.

I also didn't pass my Drving test until the 3rd go lol....

I know how upset you must be feeling now, but you have to dust yourself down and get straight back on with it.... you know you can do it!

Go have a chill out evening, cry loads if you want to, and have a good sleep, you will have a better perspective on it in the morning

Novaxx

(41lbs lost so far on SS in 8 weeks)
 
#7
Thanks Nova

I know I'll have a much better perspective on it tomorrow. But I think I've already decided what I'll do--I need to swallow my pride and retake the whole year, rather than do the exam retake immediately.

It's been a really challenging year. My OH had major surgery back in January and it was touch and go for a while--and then recovery seemed to take forever. My failing the first exam had a lot to do with how much stress we were all under at the time.

Heigh ho. I guess you could say that having survived this year, I can survive anything. And at least I'll be three stones lighter by the end of it. :)
 
#8
what exams you doing lily ? would be a shame to drop back a year , for the sake of a few extra marks , which you will gain on a resit. but you have to be happy with what you are doing . its damn hard when you have to study and you have a family to think about , your bp must be thru the roof !!!
big hugs for whatever you decide to do , you just do whats right for you.
sue
xxx
 


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