Food addict seeing her cambridge counsellor tom

R

rachellee

Full Member
I took the plunge and have made an appointment to see my counsellor tomorrow. I want to stop being dependent on food. My life is controlled by food.

I am so scared of starting the cambridge plan at the same time. I am so scared of the horrible feelings I get when I don't have food to calm my nerves.

My stomach hurts from bingeing. My head hurts from bingeing. I am so full I can hardly walk. I am scared of going out of the house.

But I have to get out of this rut that I put myself in.
I have to.
 
Morning please do not be scared it's the beginning of the new you!

Feeling heavy bloated feeling goes honestly, u feel light empty and full of energy I adore it.

Be 100% and you will see soon. X
 
Hey

I'm a fellow addict (full on proper one .. not just saying it as a joke) so understand how you feel. I felt out of control but with the help of a therapist I am unwinding the dynamics behind my behaviour. You may want to speak to your GP about getting a referral for some support if you feel you need the help.

You might find this of some interest http://www.minimins.com/cambridge-diet-forum/174691-emotional-eating-questionnaire.html
I'm now week 5 of CD and feel so much more in control - it's achievable and congrats on taking the first step :D
 
Thank you for the support.

I'm so addicted to food its unbearable. After seeing my cambridge counsellor, I went home and binged. I felt so out of control. Like...how am I going to make it through the cambridge diet? I am so going to fail? so why start?!!!

After my horrible binge, I felt so full. So full that I could throw up without forcing myself too.

I'm starting the cambridge diet tom. I better start before the hole that I have been digging for myself becomes too deep.

I'm doing this diet secretly, so I can't be on SS. My fiancee doesn't approve of diets. He doesn't understand BED even though I tried explaining to him. So I'm going on plan 3. 2 meal replacements and a normal healthy dinner. Oh....what is a normal dinner??? How am I going to control myself??? I wish I could just take food out of the equation but I can't.

I really want to be free.
It's a marathon. I have to remind myself that.
 
My husband was the same as your boyfriend ... I finally just said, "Look, this is what I'm doing. I'm not having solid food. I'm having 3 shakes or soups a day until I can get some control back. You wouldn't ask an alcoholic to just take one or two drinks a day--- you'd expect abstinence and for me, that's what the CD 100% is. Total abstinence from food until I can make more reasoned and intelligent choices about what foods I put in my mouth (or don't!)."

I think if you think 100% is what will give you control, then that's what you should do, despite what your partner thinks.
 
Hello girls,

I was, well I still am to one point, on the same boat. I am starting my diet today, strictly Sole Source!

Like an idiot I succumbed to what is commonly known as "the last supper syndrome" in which the day before you start your life changing diet, you go and binge to your hearts content.

Though you can say my binge was not that bad, a simple dinner meat and chips, I really felt compelled to slap myself and throw up... How could I have done this to myself?

Anyways, I hope both of you get the support and love you deserve from your partners, it's vital so we can be motivated throughout this journey.

Rachellee, have you tried airtime down with him and explaining or even bringing your CD counsellor there to have a word with you both together?
It might help him understand that he needs to let you help yourself.
So good luck Hun ;)

My wifey has been very supportive to me, and that makes a really big difference. She sometimes texts me just to remind me ;)
She said if I cheat I get spanked lol wouldn't mind that either lol.

Anyways good luck to you both and don't forget, we are on this together, it's for our own health and future.
Take this time of your life to pause everything else and go into a mindset knowing you are doing thus medical treatment for a change in life.
After all, what's a couple months in your lifetime?

It's nothing compared to the benefits. And I hope soon we can all post in the before and after pictures forum, and be proud of what we achieved ;)
 
hiya all
Thanks for the support. I didn't manage to start CD yesterday. I knew yesterday was going to be a failure. But I am starting today! Had my very first bar of CD for breakfast. It's pretty tiny the portion!! ( but I reminded myself to drink loads of water), so I'm ok so far.

Fiancee keeps insisting that I simply have to eat healthily ( like more fruits, nuts etc) rather than waste money on low calorie unpleasant tasting unnatural substances, so I rather not debate with him over it. I'll try to do it on my own. Difficult, yes....but debating with him will simply makes me feel horrid--> and lead to a binge.

My future MIL isn't making things better for me. She keeps on saying how ugly I am. So, whenever I feel like bingeing...I am going to remind myself that bingeing is exactly what she would want me to do...and thus not to do it!!
trying to be strong.
COme on I can do it!
 
Rachellee, I dont want to sound nasty but...

Shouldnt your fiancee at that stage (near marriage) be far more supportive while seeing that you are actually taking steps to help yourself?

I find it a bit sad that attitude he seems to have. Maybe its just me, but as a grown up adult you should also decide what to do with your life, and since this is only a positive change trying to make your life better, more power to you.
Someone who loves you entirely, will also love your choices.

But again, thats just me, so I wish you good luck in whatever happens. :)
 
rachellee said:
hiya all
Thanks for the support. I didn't manage to start CD yesterday. I knew yesterday was going to be a failure. But I am starting today! Had my very first bar of CD for breakfast. It's pretty tiny the portion!! ( but I reminded myself to drink loads of water), so I'm ok so far.

Fiancee keeps insisting that I simply have to eat healthily ( like more fruits, nuts etc) rather than waste money on low calorie unpleasant tasting unnatural substances, so I rather not debate with him over it. I'll try to do it on my own. Difficult, yes....but debating with him will simply makes me feel horrid--> and lead to a binge.

My future MIL isn't making things better for me. She keeps on saying how ugly I am. So, whenever I feel like bingeing...I am going to remind myself that bingeing is exactly what she would want me to do...and thus not to do it!!
trying to be strong.
COme on I can do it!
Click to expand...

Hi Rachelle,

most of those who have no experience of VLCD have an unfortunate opinion of them.Sometimes, if possible ,its best not to share with folk who cannot be supportive and get support where the support is.
 
survived lunch.
Without food to eat them up, my emotions are beginning to survive. It feels terrible. I'm feeling lonely, scared, undeserving, useless, unfulfilled. I'm used to negative feelings....mainly being guilt and self hatred for bingeing, but these feelings are new and so difficult to handle.
I want to eat, to get rid of them ( albeit temporarily); but I am trying hard not to.

Reminder to oneself: you will feel worse after the binge. MUCH MUCH WORSE. so don't give up. These negative emotions are normal and natural. They are just thoughts. Many people go through these feelings without numbing them. You can too. It will get better. It will.

My fiance will let me go on the CC if I wanted to. I just don't want to introduce him to the dysfunctional world of eating. He's has alot of things to worry about already. I don't want to add to his worries.

I'm not hungry, but I want to stop feeling so bad. Thanks for the support guys. How are you doing?

Everything I feel like bingeing...I'm going to think of my MIL...and how she will gloat if I gave in.
 
What a wicked woman to make you feel so badly about yourself. I do think it would help if you had one Real Life person to support you so you definitely need to make the most of the time you have with your CDC.

For some people, 'eating healthy-more fruit, nuts, etc' works, but not for me and not for most addictive eaters. It's a compulsion and eating more fruit and nuts wouldn't mean I didn't go and eat 5 bars, 2 packets of crisps and junk, it just means I'd eat them AND those addictive comfort foods.

Take some time to think about why you are doing this FOR YOU and use that as motivation. I have a feeling you won't let yourself be a doormat to your MIL if you are feeling stronger and more in control of what you put in your mouth.

I'm sorry for your troubles.
 
I tried the healthy eating, but you know what happened?

I was binging on the bloody things LOL!
Seriously!

And then I thought, hang on, there are chocolate covered raising and nuts out there, might aswell make it more enjoyable...

So yeah, doesnt work for me. I need total abstinence, either I am on the diet or I am not, and I found that Cambridge Sole Source allows me to control myself better as its either ON or OFF.
 
I'm the same, TripleWhopper, measuring portions, figuring out what to eat...it all makes me obsessive to the point where I'm actually thinking about food and food only. On CD100%, thinking of what you're going to eat doesn't take more than 10sec in front of the pile of packets. I'm having a cappucino shake now and a mushroom soup later!

I've lost 15lbs in 18 days and I'm 25% of the way to my goal!
Yay!
 
Congrats galwaymum! so happy for you!
How's it going triplewhopper?

I survived dinner. Technically the day isn't over yet, but I won't be eating anymore for the day. Ive ate my recommended and required no of calories and nutrients for today. and I must stick to it.

Facing a deluge of emotions. horrible emotions. feeling stupid, worthless, redundant, lonely.
I just have to remind myself to bear with these feelings.....I'm finding it out to stand because I've never let myself truly feel them...I almost bury them with food and self loathing.

Hmmm what shall I do tom? perhaps I should enquire about doing some volunteer work.

You can do it girl. Just think of yr MIL. Don't let her words hurt you. don't.
 
Dinner was hard. I felt really hungry. ended up eating more than the plan.

Overall today, I overate by 1/2 bowl of rice, a palm size of chocolate granola, and 1/3 of a bar.

Feeling a bit guilty here. tried to slow down my eating but I could not.

Hmm...walked quite a bit today. Does this contribute to me eating more??

I must try not to let myself get upset for not following the plan...else I willl binge. Am suspecting that my walking made me burn more calories which made me more hungry.

TO oneself: ok, you overexceeded today but that doesn't mean that it's end all. getting back into the plan tomorrow will still put you back on track. DOn't follow the I BLEW IT AND SO FORGET IT mentality. It makes no sense and will only get you back bingeing which will makes you fatter which you don't want!!!

trying to hang in there. Hope everyone is doing ok.
 
reminder to oneself:
don't let your MIL's words put you down and make you binge. You are stronger than that Rachelle.
 
*Shanny* said:
Morning please do not be scared it's the beginning of the new you!

Feeling heavy bloated feeling goes honestly, u feel light empty and full of energy I adore it.

Be 100% and you will see soon. X
Click to expand...

I completely agree! After the first week I felt amazing!!!! Good luck!!!
 
may trigger: didn't manage to stick to the plan

SO I didn't stick to my plan this morning. I kinda knew that I was going to exceed it.
woke up feeling really hungry and weak. Slowly ate my bar and drank a lot of water...but I still felt horrid. So ate 1/2 cup of melon, followed by 2 fist full of baked soya nuts, 1/2 cup of LF cold chocolate, nibble of yoghurt bar, and 1/6 of another cambridge bar.

Gosh....that's quite a lot!!
This cambridge diet is fierce. Kudos to all of you who can really stick to it. I don't know how you guys deal with the tiredness and weakness it initially brings. I can't take it. I find it so hard to concentrate on anything, or even do my housework. Even visualizing my MIL doesn't make it any easier.

Lousy willpower of mine. I have more energy now ( duh, cos I've been eating!)....so shall go for a more vigorous walk.

Am feeling a bit ashamed to write this down, cos some of you guys have been so good sticking to yr plan, while I'm faltering and its only day 3. But still root for me please all? =)

I will try to stick as much to the plan as possible. ( mine is plan 3). I honestly don't think I will be able to strictly follow it, but I hope that it gives me some framework of how many calories I can eat a day and help me track my eating better.

I hope that this is not a triggering post for any of you.
I hope everyone is doing ok.
 
You have like 23lbs to lose isnt it?

Why dont you try to stick to Sole Source for 2 months and get it done and over with ? :)
 
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