LizzMB
WILL be Slim!
Ok, so i have had a nightmare couple of weeks! not all the time, but 2/3 days a week seem to be horrific for me in terms of chocolate so i have decided now enough is enough!
I am determined not to continue this cycle a moment longer!
I spent some of this week on the 1000 cal plan and ended up having more fruit than i should, then in came the chocs and ice cream etc!
I do seem to have a reason for it though. I havent had a period for over 2 months and i have FINALLY come on (Sorry if TMI) so i am dead happy! but it would also make sense to the constant need to eat at the moment! Didnt even realise i was coming on, just thought i as picking more than usual and losing the plot!
I am NOT losing the plot!
Today, i spent all day starving myself (i know i know) repenting from last nights binge....and then i thought i should go back on SS blar blar blar.
Then reality has kicked back in!
I will NOT turn to SS becuase i have cocked up! I will accept the scales becuase i need to accept the consequences of eating badly!
In the morning (its just gone midnight!), i will be going for a run. The first of many now i'm on 1000 plan.
I am also totally GIVING up chocolate! Its obvously something i can not have in moderation so i'm cutting it out completely!
No CD bar's, no CD Choc shakes, no hot choc etc NOTHING! I will not be dragged down by something i know i dont need and i will beat this stupid cycle of self-destruction!
I am 100% on board now! CD is the way forward and i am worth more than getting big again!
i hate that i feel fatter! I hate that i LOOK fatter.
I hate that i am letting myself down!
I hate that i have lost that wonderful feeling of what it was like to get to "healthy" and it seems to have been a downward spiral since then!
It was my wedding anniversary today (or yesterday - Friday) and i had a nice meal for dinner....tuna steak, 200g new potatoes and asparagus....all totally on plan and all lovely!
I now have 7 weeks until my birthday and i will get into the 10's by then!
Sorry for the moan/verbal self-*****-slap but i think i need to publically proclaim that i have cocked up....but the journey to repair this and me has started now!
I WILL NOT COMFORT EAT!!!!!!!!!!
xxx
I am determined not to continue this cycle a moment longer!
I spent some of this week on the 1000 cal plan and ended up having more fruit than i should, then in came the chocs and ice cream etc!
I do seem to have a reason for it though. I havent had a period for over 2 months and i have FINALLY come on (Sorry if TMI) so i am dead happy! but it would also make sense to the constant need to eat at the moment! Didnt even realise i was coming on, just thought i as picking more than usual and losing the plot!
I am NOT losing the plot!
Today, i spent all day starving myself (i know i know) repenting from last nights binge....and then i thought i should go back on SS blar blar blar.
Then reality has kicked back in!
I will NOT turn to SS becuase i have cocked up! I will accept the scales becuase i need to accept the consequences of eating badly!
In the morning (its just gone midnight!), i will be going for a run. The first of many now i'm on 1000 plan.
I am also totally GIVING up chocolate! Its obvously something i can not have in moderation so i'm cutting it out completely!
No CD bar's, no CD Choc shakes, no hot choc etc NOTHING! I will not be dragged down by something i know i dont need and i will beat this stupid cycle of self-destruction!
I am 100% on board now! CD is the way forward and i am worth more than getting big again!
i hate that i feel fatter! I hate that i LOOK fatter.
I hate that i am letting myself down!
I hate that i have lost that wonderful feeling of what it was like to get to "healthy" and it seems to have been a downward spiral since then!
It was my wedding anniversary today (or yesterday - Friday) and i had a nice meal for dinner....tuna steak, 200g new potatoes and asparagus....all totally on plan and all lovely!
I now have 7 weeks until my birthday and i will get into the 10's by then!
Sorry for the moan/verbal self-*****-slap but i think i need to publically proclaim that i have cocked up....but the journey to repair this and me has started now!
I WILL NOT COMFORT EAT!!!!!!!!!!
xxx