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GILL'S JOURNEY BACK TO REALITY

#1
This diary is going to be mostly for me, so that I can keep track of where I might go wrong etc., but if anyone wants to join me then hi!

I am 51 years old and weigh 17 stone. How I got here, I don't know. I seem to have put on loads of weight over the last two months and only realised it last night! Where has my head been, I don't know. It was only when I said to my friend 'I am the heaviest I have ever been, can you tell' and she said, 'well, actually, yes'. Good for her, no-one else ever says anything, too polite. But I can fool myself for Britain, if it was in the Olympics I would win gold for fooling myself. But I can't do it any longer, I have got to do something about it, carrying this weight is really restricting me as my feet and ankles hurt all the time.

So, what diet to do? Cambridge worked for me, lost two stone last year but felt awful the whole time. I never went into ketosis and felt weak and hungry for 7 weeks. Or do I do slimming world? That also worked in the past, but so much slower, but it would help to change how I eat for ever, which is the only thing that will keep me slim, once and if, I ever get there.

I start back at work on Monday, following major surgery three months ago, and I am dreading it so much. I am on my feet all day and at the moment, I am so heavy, I think I will manage only a couple of hours. Not due to the hip replacement I had, but just the pressure on my poor feet. Plus, I get so hot and sweaty and look awful. I will be working in my local hospital and it is always so warm anyway.

So, today I am going to decide on the diet and draw a menu plan for next week, then I will go for a walk.

Tomorrow I will shop for my menu, plus buy some tupperware tubs to put my lunch in to take to work.

Even as I am writing this, I think I will do Slimming World. I can't work on the wards and not eat, I did that last year and came over faint a couple of times. It's just that I want it to come off quickly, just like every other fat person in the whole world. But I have to be tough on myself, I did this to myself and now I will have to remedy it myself, no easy answers, no quick fixes just sensible eating and regular exercise. Crap, I wish it could be easy. So here goes..........
 
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#2
day 2

Doing well so far. I have decided to go back on Slimming World and today I have eaten:
oops forgot breakfast, very unlike me.
Banana mid morning
Roast lamb, loads of veggies and two roast potatoes (8 syns)
water melon
 

EmVeg

Do a little dance!
#3
Just wanted to drop in and offer my support. I still maintain that the first month of making those small changes is the hardest - and where I normally give up.

Good luck with Slimming World - this is a fantastic forum to offer you that extra bit of umph!

My tip - Go and read a success story if you're feeling low about it all. It really helps.
 
#4
Thanx Emveg, I was on this forum last year when I lost nearly two stone with Cambridge Diet and it really helped. So I hope to get, and give, the same sort of support. I wonder what happened to all the people I used to talk to, some of them were going really well and I have no doubt that they got to goal! Hey ho!
 
#5
Well, first day back on the ward today and it was much easier than I had been dreading. My feet hurt but not too bad. Plus, I was able to fill the dishwasher when I got home, so that shows that I still had some energy left.

Breakfast - 2 weight watchers toast slices plus 1 banana

Lunch - home made rice, pulse and chilli mess

Dinner - more of the chilli mess, doesn't taste much of chilli though, 1 x muller light fruit (strawberry)

snacks - 4 slices of thin chicken slices, 8 small bits of chocolate cereal from Lidl

I am a bit cravy at the moment, fancy something solid and sweet (perhaps a cake?) but having read the bit on emotional eating I realise that I am not really hungry, just need an inner cuddle.

2 days till weigh day.
 
#6
Well, end of day 2 at work and I feel really good. I started a fitness routine about three weeks ago and it has started to pay off. I am not as exhausted after a shift on my feet as I thought I would be. Diet is going well, I am NOT going to be hungry, I just hope I'm not eating too much. Slimming World says you can eat loads of free foods so that is what I am doing. More chilli rice today, more spices made it quite nice.

Snacks had yesterday - 2 bananas

Breakfast today - 4 pieces Nimble bread
2 bananas

Lunch - Chilli Rice

Snack- Chilli rice

Dinner - not had yet, plan to have pasta and tomato/onion sauce
 
#7
Another good day!

Dinner last night - chilli rice, mullerlight

breakfast - 1 slice of seeded bread, banana
lunch - pulses and beans in spicy tomato sauce
snack - mullerlight

feet killing me today so no walk tonight.
 
#8
bad day at Black Rock today, feeling very unconfident so typically solved that with chocolate and had a Boost bar then had two full rounds of sandwiches when I got home. I wonder why those feelings of low self esteem always make me want to eat something fattening.

Lost 4lbs last week which was good. I think I'll have a meat meal tonight, loads of chicken might help.

On a positive note I think we will be going to Jamaica around Christmas, for a week. Just my 17 year old son and me, perhaps my 20 year old son if he can get the time off.
 
#9
Hi gilly, well done on your loss this week. Jamaica sounds wonderful! Gives you something to aim for hun. Keep at it, you only fail when you give up trying x x x
 


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