scousemouse0151
soon to be minnie mouse
is it just me or is every other thread about POOR ME I HAD A CHEAT somebody please tell me if i'm the only one feeling this. i am commmited 100% and sorry to say i'm getting a bit peed off. rant over sorry.
Have We Entered The Cheating Zone
- Thread starter scousemouse0151
- Start date
Starlight
Gold Member
Minimins is a weight loss SUPPORT forum. Its very easy to come here and say 'Ive stuck to my diet' 'I resisted temptation' 'Ive lost Xlbs' whats much harder is to admit to failing, whether its a temporary one meal failure or a completely off the diet failure.
Everyone on here has failed at diets at one point or other, now we're trying to find our way on the right diet for us, be it CD, LT, WW etc, sometimes finding the right diet is a journey in itself and its not til you rule out the diet that ISNT for you that you find the one that is.
Being able to come on here and hold your hands up to 'cheating' or whatever takes a lot and is essential in getting back on track. How many times has one blip led to another and another and before you know it its over.
The tough love approach isnt always helpful either, a bit of SUPPORT and encouragement is far more benefit than telling someone what they already know. So maybe there are a few 'Ive had a cheat thread' but thats fine. This isnt purely a celebratory or congratulations forum so lets share the downs and the ups and try help someone whos struggling find their feet again instead of making them feel even worse
Everyone on here has failed at diets at one point or other, now we're trying to find our way on the right diet for us, be it CD, LT, WW etc, sometimes finding the right diet is a journey in itself and its not til you rule out the diet that ISNT for you that you find the one that is.
Being able to come on here and hold your hands up to 'cheating' or whatever takes a lot and is essential in getting back on track. How many times has one blip led to another and another and before you know it its over.
The tough love approach isnt always helpful either, a bit of SUPPORT and encouragement is far more benefit than telling someone what they already know. So maybe there are a few 'Ive had a cheat thread' but thats fine. This isnt purely a celebratory or congratulations forum so lets share the downs and the ups and try help someone whos struggling find their feet again instead of making them feel even worse
Porgeous
Chilling
Maybe a little controversial.... I agree that everyone should feel able to come on Minis and shout their success and also offload when things aren't going so well, however, there I do believe that sometimes by empathising when people "cheat" you are not actually helping them because what you are actually doing is saying it's okay which can lead to continued cheating. I am not condoning tough love either, but surely there is a middle ground?
Gx
Gx
this is true but being told to "toughen up"
when you are obviously looking for a bit if reasureance, i dont think is the way to go.
from personal experience if i have had a "cheat" my personal guilt is enough to get me down, and by coming on here and getting support i can think " right put it behind me and lets try again" rather that well ive messed up, sod it!
xx
when you are obviously looking for a bit if reasureance, i dont think is the way to go.
from personal experience if i have had a "cheat" my personal guilt is enough to get me down, and by coming on here and getting support i can think " right put it behind me and lets try again" rather that well ive messed up, sod it!
xx
Miel
French Honey
Kicking someone when they are down is never going to make them feel positive and can easily lead them to give up.
Surely it's better to offer support in these times and encouragement to get back to the plan (which is generally the response that anyone would get). We are hardly celebratory with anyone that cheats so I don't think that we encourage it; rather, we accept it and try to help each other to look beyond the cheat and move on.
Remember that, you should always treat others as you yourself would wish to be treated.
Surely it's better to offer support in these times and encouragement to get back to the plan (which is generally the response that anyone would get). We are hardly celebratory with anyone that cheats so I don't think that we encourage it; rather, we accept it and try to help each other to look beyond the cheat and move on.
Remember that, you should always treat others as you yourself would wish to be treated.
I had a huge barney with my adorable other half. I was being a cow! I fell of the wagon this week and in future will put in place a strategy to prevent emotional eating. It wasn't BAD food I ate, it was too much good food. I am still on line for a weight loss though. This is my first wobble in over two months. It happens to the best of us!
Mrs B
Silver Member
We're only human that's why we've ended up on CD. It's fairly obvious which threads are about cheating - don't read them.
Seaneen
Short and pink
I hate being kicked when I cheat. Compounds already negative feelings. This is a diet, and it's tough. People shouldn't be made to feel like human failures just because they succumb and essentially *eat* once in a while. I think cheating, even the phrase, is horrible and self defeating. It's not weakness to eat something. Eating is a natural response. It's strong to get back on the wagon. It *is* a difficult diet and booting someone when they're down doesn't help.
I don't know, I don't think I should be here because although I want everyone to succeed and need support, I absolutely loathe dieting language like cheating and sinning and whatever. I also get worried when pro-ana type statements are made like "nothing tastes as good as thin feels". Then again, I don't have as much to lose as a lot of people here and my weight wasn't a problem til recently so I probably have no right saying that.
And I don't think that compassionate support is enabling. People already feel like toss for eating and don't need to be made to feel worse.
I don't know, I don't think I should be here because although I want everyone to succeed and need support, I absolutely loathe dieting language like cheating and sinning and whatever. I also get worried when pro-ana type statements are made like "nothing tastes as good as thin feels". Then again, I don't have as much to lose as a lot of people here and my weight wasn't a problem til recently so I probably have no right saying that.
And I don't think that compassionate support is enabling. People already feel like toss for eating and don't need to be made to feel worse.
Sunnysmile
Laserbeams set on goal
Awww, I think we all need people to remind us at times that we CAN do it and to encourage us back on the wagon.
I've cheated before and the posts on here cheered me up no end and stopped me doing it again!
xx
I've cheated before and the posts on here cheered me up no end and stopped me doing it again!
xx
Sez
has started again!!
Hmmm really interesting & thought provoking too. Yes, I agree with Georgie that there must be a middle ground. I some times feel the tough love approach, at times, would have made me feel utter pants and sent me straight back to the biscuit tin, on the oter hand the "there, there" approach doesnt always help me either. I react differently at different time & I always (sincerely) value all the help I am offered. It is fab the people are prepared to give their thoughts, feelings and time on a forum such as this, and we need to respect both those who ask for help, for whatever reason, and those who offer it, whether we consider it the right or wrong response.
We are here, imho, to help each other through what is, after all, a very unnatural diet. It is bloomin tough and if someone (myself included) asks for help because they are finding it so should we not respect that request by responding from the heart and then allowing them to make up their own (adult)mind as to where they go next?
Sorry, didnt mean to produce such a great long diatribe and its great that we are all able to air our opinions on "everything" to do with this forum, diet or whatever!!
Good luck to all who diet and all those who support, we ALL need it!!
xx
We are here, imho, to help each other through what is, after all, a very unnatural diet. It is bloomin tough and if someone (myself included) asks for help because they are finding it so should we not respect that request by responding from the heart and then allowing them to make up their own (adult)mind as to where they go next?
Sorry, didnt mean to produce such a great long diatribe and its great that we are all able to air our opinions on "everything" to do with this forum, diet or whatever!!
Good luck to all who diet and all those who support, we ALL need it!!
xx
There is a middle ground and that middle ground comes from those who have cheated and then got back on track because they understand the issue. (The issue being the fear of completely falling off the wagon.) And those who manage to stick to CD 100% to show that it can be done. From both, those of us who cheat/fail along the way draw inspiration and dust ourselves off and get back on track. When we do lose weight we congratulate each other. To me that is best thing about this forum. I find I can draw inspiration from those who stick to CD 100% (or any other diet) and also from those who cheat because it helps me when I waver, and I remind myself that I am doing this for me and me alone.
Tarragon
Silver Member
Kira and Sez I agree completely, much as I admire those who stick to the diet 100% and find them inspirational, I still don't know if I can do that after many years of 'cheating'. I find one of the hardest parts for me is actually admitting if I have a nibble, and being on here, both the support and tellings off help. In return I hope that I can sometimes help others with support, isn't that what this is all about!
Minimins is a weight loss SUPPORT forum. Its very easy to come here and say 'Ive stuck to my diet' 'I resisted temptation' 'Ive lost Xlbs' whats much harder is to admit to failing, whether its a temporary one meal failure or a completely off the diet failure.
Everyone on here has failed at diets at one point or other, now we're trying to find our way on the right diet for us, be it CD, LT, WW etc, sometimes finding the right diet is a journey in itself and its not til you rule out the diet that ISNT for you that you find the one that is.
Being able to come on here and hold your hands up to 'cheating' or whatever takes a lot and is essential in getting back on track. How many times has one blip led to another and another and before you know it its over.
The tough love approach isnt always helpful either, a bit of SUPPORT and encouragement is far more benefit than telling someone what they already know. So maybe there are a few 'Ive had a cheat thread' but thats fine. This isnt purely a celebratory or congratulations forum so lets share the downs and the ups and try help someone whos struggling find their feet again instead of making them feel even worse
Thank you Sandy,
couldn't have said it better myself. Occasionally there is a thread which annoys me but I just don't read it..
xxx
Mrs Depp
Gold Member
I also don't like the word 'cheat'. If I do eat on SS it's because I am an 'emotional eater', I eat when I'm happy, sad, bored, hungry, stressed........
I got to nearly 13 stone by eating the same sized meals as my ex. Instead of putting just enough food on my plate I'd put the same amount as I did on his - and eat the lot. That's why I put on so much weight in the first few years of our marriage.
I've eaten this time around on CD but tried to stick close to 810, I'm being honest with myself now, I don't really know why I can't do it 100%, I've asked myself "I'm one of the lucky ones who found it easy first time around so why is it so hard now?" If I knew the answer to that I'd be a millionaire wouldn't I? There is no one definite answer for me, I need to get my head around that.
Anyway, I'd prefer to call it a lapse, a hiccup, anything but a cheat because I don't need to punish myself and feel any more guilty than I do after the fact.
I got to nearly 13 stone by eating the same sized meals as my ex. Instead of putting just enough food on my plate I'd put the same amount as I did on his - and eat the lot. That's why I put on so much weight in the first few years of our marriage.
I've eaten this time around on CD but tried to stick close to 810, I'm being honest with myself now, I don't really know why I can't do it 100%, I've asked myself "I'm one of the lucky ones who found it easy first time around so why is it so hard now?" If I knew the answer to that I'd be a millionaire wouldn't I? There is no one definite answer for me, I need to get my head around that.
Anyway, I'd prefer to call it a lapse, a hiccup, anything but a cheat because I don't need to punish myself and feel any more guilty than I do after the fact.
Very interesting thread. Last year when I did the diet I also used to tut at those who had eaten and thought - what is the point of doing this diet if they are going against the rules...that was up until week 8 ( 100% ss no food except aam ) I ate!!!
I think that most of us do have a problem handling food - which is why we're here - and I'm back again. If we see that others have had just a weak moment but they've managed to get back on track and continued on the diet it motivates us to stick with it. I know that I would have thrown in the towel last time round had it not been for someones post on their experiences.
Each to their own - I also read of posts where people have had quite a few meals they shouldn't have yet still have great loses - this just makes me jealous as the slightest thing puts lbs on me!!!
Ceri
I think that most of us do have a problem handling food - which is why we're here - and I'm back again. If we see that others have had just a weak moment but they've managed to get back on track and continued on the diet it motivates us to stick with it. I know that I would have thrown in the towel last time round had it not been for someones post on their experiences.
Each to their own - I also read of posts where people have had quite a few meals they shouldn't have yet still have great loses - this just makes me jealous as the slightest thing puts lbs on me!!!
Ceri
Similar threads
