Having a crisis.

[Soraya]

I posted this in my maint diary and it struck me that it may not be seen there.

Right, I have gained to my trigger point and it's time to do something. Just under a fortnight ago I saw that I had gained 10lbs. I wasn't too worried as I'd been pretty ill and depressed afterwards. I started to track and cut the calories and the weight came down to within a couple of lbs of normal. But I've weighed after easter and its a stone up which is my emergency trigger point.

I was replying to someones post about why it's hard and what keeps you fat. My mum has been visiting and she's competitively thin bless her which is stressful. My mil wants us to spend money on her, my DH is miserable and being bullied in his job, I'm trying to get a new business off the ground as well as my current job. Essentially I'm at stress breaking point and what a surprise, I'm repeating old habits and taking refuge in food!

I feel a fraud having a maintenance diary at all. My maintenance has never been flat with only a few lbs variation. It's always been that my weight tries to go back up in stressful times and I just don't let it.

So now what? My plan was that I would go back to CD if this happened but my CDC who I loved has disappeared. She has her own stuff she needs to deal with, has moved house miles away (an hour long drive) and the only other CDC here has her own weight issues. No offence but it doesn't fill me with confidence to go to a CDC whose BMI is obese. It just reinforces to me that permanent weight loss is impossible. (I've never met anyone who lost weight and kept it off before I met my CDC). I have soup packs but not the tetras and nearly bid for some off ebay!

I do have a low carb plan for losing less weight but for this much the support of my CDC was crucial to me. I've kind of run out of puff and feel myself crumbling trying to keep my family together and the weight down too.

 

[Glorious_Day]

I really hope you find the light at the end of the tunnel soon, just reading your post made me feel anxious. For whats its worth, i don't think cd is the answer, rome wasn't built in a day and it seems to me like you are putting way way to much pressure on yourself. Have you considered talking to your GP? What about LL have you considered that? sounds like your problems could be more efficiently dealt with by CBT, cdc's don't have to be professionally qualified to deal with "stuff" - I know mine isn't but i personally don't feel i need that so it works for me brilliantly.

Its not harsh saying you don't want to see an overweight cdc but to discount someone because of their waist size doesn't make sense to me?! but that my opinion.

Really hope you start smiling again soon, J

(replied on your diary too but didn't want to miss you)

 

[Soraya]

Hi, thanks for the help. I have almost decided that I'll low carb. I looked at the GI but it looks way to complicated.

I went shopping today to get the right foods in and we'll see how it goes. I've also decided to get back to the gym tomorrow as I think I'm over the worst and now at the stage where exercise will help.

Sorry to seem bad about the overweight CDC, goodness knows after years of being overweight myself, I'm not judging people. It's just that I had alot of doubts about CD when I went to talk to my CDC at the start. I have never seen anyone lose weight and keep it off for more than a few months. The fact that my CDC had done the journey also made me feel she would be able to support me and she did. The CDC near me has never successfully lost the weight and I feel that for me she reinforces my doubts that long term weight loss is possible and worse I might use it as an excuse to justify myself - 'it didn't work for her why should I think it'll work for me may as well stop trying and get fat again' Twisted thinking, but I know what I can be like.

Won't be able to post again until the weekend so fingers crossed it will be good news.

 

[Porgeous]

Hi Soraya

Sorry only just seen your post. Firstly and most importantly well done for responding to your trigger and addressing the situation before its goes any further!!

Re going back on CD my personal view would be not to. The reason I say this is because in order to achieve life long maintenance we need to try and avoid yo yoing between gaining, doing CD for a bit, gaining, doing CD for a bit. Its all about learning to manage our weight by eating normally - easier said than done I know!! How about calorie counting, there is a great website Weight Loss Resources where you can enter all your food and it calculates all the nutrition and calories.

Anyway I will stop waffling, good luck with whatever you decide.

Gxxx

 

[caronlookalike]

Hi Soraya

Some random thoughts: Paul McKenna and Susie Orbach ("Fat is a Feminist Issue") both have books that teach the self-same programme: how to eat when you're hungry, how to stop when you're full, etc. My aunt swears by it.

Have you read "Fat is a Feminist Issue"? It's really eye-opening. Susie Orbach runs classes in north London for people with compulsive eating issues The Women's Therapy Centre Also, try Geneen Roth's programmes around the same problems Emotional Eating - Diets - Bingeing - Geneen Roth

Pete Cohen used to run seminars based around his book "Lighten Up" but after a quick trawl on Google I can only find his online sessions Weight-Loss Motivation Expert - Pete Cohen's Online Program

Good luck!

 

[caronlookalike]

More resources to help with maintenance ..

This looks good too! Pete Cohen - Desperation Equation

 

[Soraya]

It's working

Hi guys, thanks for the support. I decided against CD, but have been working hard. Despite a few slips, I lost 2.6lbs this week and am really pleased. I'm back in the gym, mainly doing a kind of cardio toning

I planned a simple menu of a low carb shake, turkey/chicken salad for lunch and a chicken breast/fish fillet with green veg in the evening. I loved the 80/20 rule for maintaining and am doing a 90/10 one for weight loss where I'm having an evening a week with whatever I want. The water is back to 4l and the coke zero is on my 10% day. IF I have a lunchtime work meeting then I take a CD soup and everyone thinks I'm having a cup a soup.

I did a lot of work about triggers and food and emotions in the few eyars before I found CD. It's scary how easy it is to go back. I'v taken my fat is a feminist issue off the dusty shelf and ordered the other one off amazon.

Althugh I sound positive, it is hard. But I'm not stopping. I was always told maintenance was a life long thing and didn't realise how true that was. I know I've beaten the odds already by not putting on all the weight within a year and am determined to keep going.

I know that I have Mini's to come to when it gets really tough!

 

[Jools]

well done on that loss ...hope you are pleased hun!

xx