• Upgrades have been completed! Including conversations, 😁😎🏀⚾⚽ Emojis and more.. Read more



He called me fat

#1
Not really sure what to think at the moment. Last night the boyfriend (J) came over very drunk and was spouting rubbish for quite some time but in the middle of this he said something about me being fat. When I got stroppy he said he'd never said it but I know what I heard.

He'd never say that sober, so I can't tell whether it's him being truthful because he was drunk or being totally stupid because he was drunk.

I'm not blind. I know I'm fat but I'm trying to fix this, I really am.

It just kinda threw me for a loop and reaffirmed fears that I had about us. *sigh*

Thinking maybe I should text him and ask if he remembers saying it... What do you think?
 
Get Rid of this ad and join in on the conversation for free today! Tap here!
Last edited:

Happe

escaping the fat
#2
Not sure it would be worth texting or calling him about this, he would deny all knowledge of having said it. Id wait till you see him again and see if you can draw out what he really thinks. I remember when I was much younger and a boyfriend at the time was fine with me until his mates started to comment about "fat birds" not completley directed at me but enough to make him start commenting to me.
 
#3
Aw hun....I wouldnt worry too much, MOST (b4 anyone shouts at me, lol) men are stupid when drunk, all the one's i've been out with have been!......He must love you for what you are otherwise he would not still be with you. He can see how well your doing and must know how hard it is. I would personally leave it this time, but if he say's it again, then I would definately ask him to explain himself.
Your lovely, and dont ever forget that!
xxxxxxx
 

Barb

Gold Member
#4
I think you need to talk to him about it. It's going to bug you if you don't and you'll just keep going over it and not get anywhere.

Booze, it really is the cause of most arguements/fall-outs.
 
#5
I would leave him and come and live with me;) XXX

You was the sober one Gem so what you heard is what you heard, whatever you do DO NOT go chasing. Blokes are arseholes when we are pi55ed thats not an excuse we just are!
Let him do the running pet, and you keep your chin up;) xxx
 

howdy-doody

Eloquent hooligan
#6
^^ what Gaz said - no excuses,what an insensitive dickhead :(

PS Gaz - you're new avator... proper just spooked me out... I know who the bloke with the Jim'll Fix It badge... it's a mate of mine called Chris who posts as Mr Raddish on another forum lololol
 

Mellum

Glug Glug Glug
#7
What an arsehole!
Excuse my langue but argh..
Youve been given alot of different advice but you should do what feels right, even if that means having it out or letting it go.

If that was me i wouldnt want to be with anyone who calls me fat. Drunk OR sober.

Hope things work out for the best!
Mellum xx
 
#8
(((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))

Typical bloody bloke!! (sorry men lol)
I personally wouldnt worry yourself about it but thats easy said innit, he wont remember & its not worth losing sleep over cos if he meant in then kick him to the kerb & if he was just angry & hitting out at what he knows will hurt you most then thats just a stupid drunken sentence that kills us but he wont recall.
Either way keep that head together cos ya can soon flash that thin ass in his face & he will eat his words & by then you will probably of had enough of him & he will be drooling :)
Niki
xx
 
#9
I know its hard, but i have to agree..... dont chase. U are worth more, if you treat yourself like your worth more and then you wont let others treat you like ur worth less.

I know its hard, for me i used to feel grateful I had a man and knew they werent queing up. When i think about how I allowed him to treat me and how i chased him .... i feel sick at myself.

I am now with a great guy, he has a 6pac and muscles to die for, but we spend our saturdays dissing skinny chicks! He supports me with my weight loss as long as I am sure its for medical reasons and not vanity.

Finding a respectful man does happen!
 

Redpam

Living the Life
#10
I think that when people are drunk they say what they think although they may not say it when sober.

By the way you are not fat. You are normal. OK you want to lose a few more pounds but you are still normal now. Dont text him, speak to him face to face
 
#11
Drink has a lot to answer to, its probably on his mind that you are on the road to a healthier, slimmer you. We all say things in the heat of the moment, but I agree its up to him to apologise and its bang out of order that he said it....like we don't know!!

Please dont let it get you down or in the way of your diet, this is for you.
 
#12
Thanks for all of the responses guys.

It's just that he's been so supportive up to that stupid comment. I know it was probably just the alcohol - it doesn't make it any easier to hear is all.

Thanks again for your support - you guys are what keeps me going xxx
 

Yasmine

One last chance
#14
What an arse hole...

I know he was drunk an all but god, that was just plain rude. Although I wouldn't worry so much, if it does, then maybe you should ask him about it.

Sod what he said anyway, you are doing something about your weight and that's all that matters at the moment. You are doing really well.
 
#15
You are not fat!!!!! You may WANT to lose a few more lbs but you certainly do not need to

It's likely that he knows that is one of your buttons? Even though he may not think you are fat, he know's it will get to you!

Hope you feel better soon, don't let it get to you and don't let it distract you from what you're doing

xx
 
#16
there is a true saying, "when a man/woman is drunk its the only time they can be truly honest with ya as when their sober they are trying to spare ones feelings". Personally I wouldnt chase him after and if ya did he is only going to deny it when hes fully aware of what he said!! More than likely your like myself and its going to bug ya to death then have it out with him but i can almost hear his response!! Your a beautiful girl and ya dont need the likes of him who dont love ya for what ya are drunk or not!! Dont let it get ya down hun, move on from it and do this for ya!! Take care
 
#17
I would speak to him about it otherwise it's just going to be playing on your mind and winding you up.
Drunk or not theres no excuse for saying anything like that even if he doesnt remember it it's clearly upset you and needs sorting out.
good luck hun.
 
#18
Okay, so against the very good advice I got here (I just can't help myself sometimes, I'm a muppet lol) I text him asking if he knew what he said to me last night. He said no and so I told him. This is the response I just received:

'I'm really, really sorry boo. I know you're trying really hard to lose weight, and you're doing really great, don't let some drunk asshole who doesn't know what he's talking about upset you xxx'

I know he was wrong - that much is for sure - but some of the people who have mentioned me leaving him prolly aren't aware that this is a relationship heading up to the 2 year mark and I don't want to throw it away. (Not because of the time frame itself but because we obviously fit together most of the time :)) I will, however, make him pay in the coming weeks for his comment :angeldevil: Isn't it Valentine's Day soon? I smell a big present heading my way ;)
 
#19
Hey babe, I hope your ok! Just read your comment, and I hope it gives you more determination to get to your goal. Let this comment spur you on, you are on the right track and you will get there and you will look and feel amazing! It is so close for you too babe, look how far you have already come, you are on your final leg to victory!!!

In relation to your boyfriend, he probably was just making a silly drunken comment, I do not think it is worth getting into an arguement over. At the end of the day, if you stick to what you are doing now then you will be slim very soon, and that will mean that you are happier within yourself and you will have more body confidence etc.

When you get to that point, then you can take a look at your relationship from a better perspective for you.

I stopped drinking about a year ago myself and I have found a boyfriend who doesnt drink. I really love being in a relationship with no drink, deffo leads for a much happier and secure relationship.

Just do not let a druken comment lower your confidence, your mood or ruin your relationship. If you know it is not something he would say if he was sober I would just let it go...

Love ya
Julz
x
 


Similar threads