HELP!!! - Falling Off The Wagon

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by snugglezzz, 15 March 2007 Social URL.

  1. snugglezzz

    snugglezzz Member

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    I really need some support and/or advice from anyone that may have or is going through the same experience.

    I started LL on 27 January 2007 and I've remained so focused and dedicated to acheive my goal - 15st to 9.5st by May 27 2007. Everything was going so well until 3 weeks ago when my uncle died. Since then I think the packs have gone out of the window. I wouldnt say I've abandoned them completely, but my determination to stick with the diet has slower started to decrease as the weeks go on.

    Whats worse is I have lost 19lbs since starting and I have noticed a considerable difference in the clothes that I wear and people have started to notice and have commented on how well I'm doing. Normally this would have been enough motivation for me to carry on, but this time it hasnt made an ounce of difference in my determination to get to my goal.

    I've seriously began to think that I cant and dont know how to get motivated to continue with the diet and its now got to the point that I'm not going to the WI for fear of the shame, disappointment and embarrassment I'll feel when my LLC asks questions about why I havent lost any weight. I have been weighing myself at home and thankfully I havent gained any weight, but saying that, I havent lost any either.

    I really want to reach my goal and I'm due to go away for 3 weeks in April for the funeral and I'm thinking if I cant nip this feeling in the bud now, God help me when I go away for 3 weeks!

    If anyone has any advice and/or support with this please post your comments.

    From a very desperate,

    Simone. x
     
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  3. Gen

    Gen Normal

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    hey there... i do know what it is like but it is a very personal thing and unfortunately you are the only one that can make the decision to stick to it...

    you seem to be going through a bit of upheavel at the moment and i know LL is fast when you are on it... believe me the weight goes back on just as fast if you are not on it totally... maybe you should look at a different method of weight loss just until everything settles down again... at least then you would be back in control and wouldn't feel like you are failing cos you can't get back on LL... believe me i know how hard it is to get back on track!!!

    I hope you feel better soon

    love
     
  4. Geri

    Geri Gold Member

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    Hiya suglezz
    so sorry to read about your Uncle....

    I'm sure your counsellor won't judge you for not losing weight, in fact she will commend you for having maintained your weightloss, thats a great acheivement hun....

    How about giving her a call and having a chat with her, you'll be fine...

    You mentioned you have a goal to loose weight by 27th May, whats happening then? Focus on that and forget about what you have or hav'nt eaten, it's all in the passed now...

    Hope that's helped

    Get shaking girl :p
     
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  5. skinnyminny

    skinnyminny Full Member

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    Hi Snugs

    I am sorry you are going through such a hard time at the moment. Doing this programme can be so tough at times and dealing with life's ups & downs on top can increase the pressure 10 fold.

    What is important is that you have come on here to ask for help, so you have not given in. You need to find your way back, I would go to the weigh ins as this will give you a source of motivation from your LLC as well as others in your group.

    I know how difficult it can be to stay motivated and I have not had to deal with your particular issues, so I understand why you are finding it tough, when you do falloff the wagon it is sooo hard to get back on, but it IS possible and with support you CAN do it.

    Please do not give up, focus on achieving small mini goals until you are in a better place mentally and then you can build up on it.

    We will be here if you need support - we are all rooting for you!
     
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  6. MaxieP

    MaxieP Full Member

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    Hi Simone,

    I started around the same time (30 Jan) and have similar amount to lose (15st 10lbs to about 10st 7lbs). I haven't got big by picking at extra food here and there, it's by being severely unhappy at work and various other things.

    Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that whilst I have no stress LL is going just fine. But, if my uncle had just died I would react exactly the same way as you. From what I've understood from the counselling so far it's for a number of reasons. It's such a big event, it sidelines LL. Like any bereavement it makes you think about the 'bigger picture' and although LL is important, it doesn't compare to life and death.

    Also, I guess pre LL you would have eaten in this situation? I don't think you've been doing it long enough to totally understand, acknowledge and accept these behaviours. This is a learnt behaviour and, in my opinion, I think I need all of the counselling and then some extensive reading around the subject before I feel I can change my ways for good. I doubt this will ever come naturally to me, but it might make the tools to tackle overeating at times like these really easy to use and it'll barely be a decision I have to make.

    Don't beat yourself up about it. Tbh, I'm sure most people deal with grief in some way e.g. food, alcohol, exercise etc. It may sounds strange but I find exercise helped me at a similar time in my life. Our cllr recommends it too for stress release.

    Hope this has helped. You seem very together so am sure you can come through it.

    Take care,

    MaxieP
     
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  7. Steph

    Steph Full Member

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    No advice sorry but wanted to send you a cyber:grouphugg: I'm very sorry to read of the loss of your Uncle.
     
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  8. katie_oxo

    katie_oxo Silver Member

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    Simone

    I'm sure if you spoke to your counsellor she would fully understand what you are going through and do her best to support you. It's a very sad time for you and grief effects everybody in different ways and right now you need all the support you can get to get you through this.

    ((hugs))

    Cath
     
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  9. Joolz

    Joolz Nomad staying slim

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    I echo all that has been said. Your LLC won't judge you, so I'd urge you to go back to weekly sessions, they will give you much needed support at a very difficult time for you. Don't see it as falling off the wagon, just a little lapse, and you CAN get back into it. My LL journey wasn't always easy but I've got there in the end. You will too. The fact that you are posting here means you DO want to do this. Eating won't take away the feelings you are going through about your uncle, and may even make you feel worse. Take strength in getting back on the packs and having that aspect of your life under control so that you can deal with the very real and fresh emotions a bereavement brings.

    Take care and big hugs.
     
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  10. flirty40greeneyes

    flirty40greeneyes Busy busy busy!!

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    For a start well done on the 20lb you have lost.

    Sorry to hear about your uncle - but I can only echo what Geri and Gen have said and that your LLC won't haul you over the coals for not losing. My weight gain over the years and specifically the last 6/9months are all down to comfort eating when i'm unhappy. Give yourself some time to grieve for your uncle ... and either do another type of weight loss diet, or stick with LL but don't be too focusssed on losing huge amounts. If you can not gain any weight now - when you feel more like going for it you'll lose the last 56lb easier.

    Keep coming on here and posting and we'll support you - but talk to your LLC as well. (((HUGS)))
     
  11. snugglezzz

    snugglezzz Member

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    Thank you everyone for your much needed support.

    Since posting the thread I'll admit that it hasnt been easy to get back onto the packs, but nonetheless I have been back on them.

    I've decided that I have 1 month before I go away and I'll use this time constructively and remain focused to lose as much weight as I can!

    Thank u soooooo much...I'm now back on my journey to get slim!

    MWAH!

    Simone x
     
  12. snugglezzz

    snugglezzz Member

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    Thank you everyone for your much needed support.

    Since posting the thread I'll admit that it hasnt been easy to get back onto the packs, but nonetheless I have been back on them.

    I've decided that I have 1 month before I go away and I'll use this time constructively and remain focused to lose as much weight as I can! :)

    Thank u soooooo much...I'm now back on my journey to get slim! :thankyou:

    MWAH!

    Simone x
     
  13. Joolz

    Joolz Nomad staying slim

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    That's great news - and good luck. You are very strong!
     
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