Hi i`m back again lol

Thinking about you - whatever decision you reach xxx
 
Another few weeks MAY kill you Roch. Sorting out your head...what does that mean? I thought a lot of the head stuff is related to your weight? If you can rid yourself of that the head stuff - well most of it will sort its self.

I'm probably going to get lynched for saying this, but Roch - you did not make a hard decision. You made the easy one. To run away.

You have chosen to do NOTHING and I cannot respect that.

Take charge of your life and stop feeling sorry for yourself. I know you have health problems - but you could have done something about it. You didn't. I can't keep feeling sorry for you when you won't do anything to help yourself. It's not that you can't - it's that you won't.

Take care Roch. I give up.
 
Hi Happe sorry I didn't see your post before.

I first saw my surgeon in September then in December had my pre op test done in Jan and had surgery early March....I was very quick due to health concernes but we didn't have to barter with the local PCT infact as soon as Surgeon agreed to do it he told me not to worry all was in hand.
So still 6 months then, Im assuming another month or so between asking GP and seeing the surgeon. As i said before so much more damage can be done by then.
 
Have to say it Roch, i agree with some of what Nicole has said. You are virtually an invalid because of your weight and the pain it causes you both mentally and physically, your son is having to be your carer, not something id want for my own children and youve been offered the magic cure and you're not jumping at it. I just dont understand. I get that you are scared of dying on the table, but none of us knows when its our time to go, could be mine tomorrow for all i know but you have to take these chances when they arise and sometimes deal with the consequences afterwards. What really do you have to lose? except pain, humiliation, anxiety, i could carry on. Stop making excuses and join the rest of us in the real world outside of your front door. Your beloved son will thank you for it.
 
Another few weeks MAY kill you Roch. Sorting out your head...what does that mean? I thought a lot of the head stuff is related to your weight? If you can rid yourself of that the head stuff - well most of it will sort its self.

I'm probably going to get lynched for saying this, but Roch - you did not make a hard decision. You made the easy one. To run away.

You have chosen to do NOTHING and I cannot respect that.

Take charge of your life and stop feeling sorry for yourself. I know you have health problems - but you could have done something about it. You didn't. I can't keep feeling sorry for you when you won't do anything to help yourself. It's not that you can't - it's that you won't.

Take care Roch. I give up.


Coley first of all u have a right to say what u want without anyone lynching u so pls nobody make any comments !!
Secondly i dont want anyone to feel sorry for me that is not the kind of person i am but u r entitled 2 your own views !!
I dont post here on MiniMins for sympathy i post here for friendship and support and because MM has become a place where i feel confortable.
I am helping myself it may not be the way u or anyone else might help themselves but i am sorting things out for myself.
Thank u for ur concern and take care
 
Hello all:D

I really feel the need to post this.....as someone who has undergone this major and it is major surgery my heart completely goes out to roch...even though I know she doesn't want to be pittied.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion but my understanding of minimins is a forum which is completely supportive of its members....some of the comments may be posted along the lines of tough love but believe me until you are in that position that if you go ahead with the surgery there is a serious possibility that you could die and leave behind your child/children I think it unfair to be so harsh.

Maybe there are other reasons as to why the op has been postponed......even contemplating this life changing/threatening surgery is far from the easy way out.

I weighed a good 8 stone less than Roch and I was made quite aware of the fact that there was a possibility I wouldn't see my children again.

I personally will support Roch in whatever decision she makes as only she will truely benefit or not from this procedure.

I know a lot of people are concerned for Roch's health as am I but are we really helping with negative comments.

All I know is in the lead up to my surgery I had a lot of invaluable support from minimin members which really did help me get through it, had I have received a few of the posts on this thread I would have felt being ridiculed was too much to take at such a sensitive time and quite possibly have turned my back on minimins feeling maybe it wasn't the place for me to seek the support needed through such a courageous task.

All I ask is before leaving any negative comments please put yourself in this position.....having to write a letter to your loved ones saying all you need to say to them and feeling tremendous guilt and fear over what could happen next.
 
Zoe what a lovely heart felt reply....we all care so much for each other that we want the best for them......
After having pretty minor surgeries compared to what Roch is going for and you have had done....I was a quivering wreck and started getting panic attacks as I was convinced I was going to die on the table. Well the anaesthetist said he wouldnt put me under so it was cancelled the day before it was due.

I can so understand all the fear of dying and the unknown on how she would feel after......!
I hope Roch makes the right decision for herself, you cant let anyone push you into anything you dont want....!
Roch take care hun, and do seriously weigh up the pro`s and con`s.....you will find there are more pro`s.....!
But its your choice.
xxxxxxxxxx
 
wow a contentious issue here huh, Roch certainley does need support and she is being supported in more ways than are apparent at face value, but to say ' ok go and sort your head out, take your time' although supportive is really not the correct thing to do in my opinion, Roch is eating herself to death, we cannot support her in that endevour, it would be wrong, I WAS eating myself to death, at only a few pounds less than Roch weighs now, so I am in no way judging Roch or her life, but I did something about it , for myself and the sake of my children, Bottom line is Roch you are clearly not ready to make this decision and nothing any of us say can change it
 
Its all out there waiting for me suddenly its in my reach !!

Over the past 24 hrs something very personal happened in my life that made me sit and and re evaluate life.
For the first time in some time i can honestly say i have felt that my life is precious and i want to do what ever i need to do phyisiscally and emotionally enable me to live and not die prematurely.
Although i was going through the emotions b4 to try and change my life i can honestly say that part of me did not feel strong enough to carry on fighting this obesity battle that i have battled with since a young child and i think that my love for Aaron is the only thing that has kept me going but still i was losing my battle to overcome my obesity problem and how much it has affected me mentally and of course phyisically.

I have decided to accept my uncles offer of a lifeline to have my surgery done privately and hopefully will have my op done in the may half term.
So from now on i am following a high protein and low carb diet and upping my water intake.

I am scared of this surgery but i can honestly say i want to live and not die so i am going to do what ever it takes to get the chance to live and be there for my beautiful son.
 
Oh Roch hun......Im sooo pleased you have had a serious thinking session and going ahead......Its fantastic news.....!
Everyone has the fear in the back of the minds, so its not you being silly.

Wahoo this is the start of Roch`s new life.
 
Oh Roch, so pleased you are going ahead. Was really worried when you didn't post for a while. You have obviously done some really deep soul searching, and I believe have made the right decision.

((((Hugs))))) to you hun
 
Oh Roch, so pleased you are going ahead. Was really worried when you didn't post for a while. You have obviously done some really deep soul searching, and I believe have made the right decision.

((((Hugs))))) to you hun

Thanks Cheryl i believe i have made the right decision now but it had to be a decision i had to make on my own and when i felt strong enough to weigh up the pros and cons rationally which i now do.
So girl how r u, take care and thanks xx
 
I am fine hun.

Obviously your head had to be in the right place to weigh up all the fors and againsts. As you say, only YOU can make the decision - just think 6 weeks or so and it will all be behind you hun and you will be walking a new path x x x
 
I am fine hun.

Obviously your head had to be in the right place to weigh up all the fors and againsts. As you say, only YOU can make the decision - just think 6 weeks or so and it will all be behind you hun and you will be walking a new path x x x

And hopefully never looking back. Wow girl u have lost 116lbs :D :D :D thats amazing xx
 
So nice to see you back Roch

love
 
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