poppyowner
Silver Member
Dean took the kids up to London this weekend - they saw DIL (DRAGON-in-law) and attended one of Deans mates familys parties (the family who used to burden themselves on us whenever they seemed fit!).
Anyway - when they were up there Amber kept texting me telling me Dean was slagging me off to his Mum and those friends - he was calling me lazy saying he had tested me in the past leaving litter somewhere and finding it still there when he got home (????), said I had a bad attitude, said that he suspected me of having an affair (???), then also told his mate how a while back he had gone to a swingers party but told me he was on call out !!!!!
I told Amber to ignore his comments and how he must've been showing off etc infront of his mates (shame our kids had to hear it though!!!!)........
Course then they arrive home...Sunday afternoon, Dean comes up to me and says "Are you going to stop being so shitty? give me a cuddle then!" - I couldn't dob in the girls for their texts (Aimee had sent a couple too) so I was internally seething by this point......... I gave him a peck on the cheek but he seemed desperately trying to spoil for a fight......everything I said he nitpicked at....
Anyway last night in bed I confronted him over swingers party bit but he told me it was his mate who told him he'd done it - when Dean at work today I again asked the girls and both were 100% positive Dean had said it.
Then last night Ernie (my beloved car) packed in - usually Dean would check and try to fix it but was in such a bad mood I didn't ask and he never offered. Breakdown brought us home which helped tho....
Today he comes home from work and goes to look at ernie but then suggests driving him a long distance to see if it leaks!!!! I was told NOT to drive him as could cause other engine damage - he throws a tantrum and says he won't look anymore....... also refused to pick up a Freecycle I'd arranged on Friday evening.....MEN!!!!!
SO I said I'd find a mechanic to come out and fix Ernie (my parents have offered to lend me the money as obviously I need the car!) - Dean then launches into how as I am fulltime Mum/Housewife (allbeit trying to find a job to fit round school hours...) the money coming in was HIS and how HE didn't want me wasting it on Mechanic and would rather see it rust on drive!!!!!!
STUFF THAT!!!! So tomorrow I AM looking for a mechanic - he had his chance today and tantrumed out of it, Michael will be missing a meet n greet at zoo tomorrow as need a car to get there and Wednesday 4Arms from Ben10 is there who michael has been counting down the days to seeing - I will not let Dean power kick Michael into missing out!!!! IF I can get ernie fixed tomorrow then SOD HIM I will!
He infuriates me soooooooo much, he moans about what he hasn't got in life ie money, flash car etc BUT NEVER sees what he has got.
Worrying me tho is we have CadburyWorld at end of this month so need Ernie in tiptop condition as over 3 hour drive!!!!!
Sorry to have this rant but just need it off my chest - he is denying the Swinger party, he denies the calling me lazy etc yet both girls have quoted the same to me separately..........
I wish the girls hadn't texted me so I'd have been blissfully ignorant!
Amber keeps telling me I can do better than him and to chuck him out / divorce him ... so sad to hear your kid say that to you!!!
Years back I tried chucking him out - he took a bag drove off then rang me 15 mins later to tell me he'd crashed into the back of another car so was on way home!!!! OH , AND HE TOLD HIS MATE THAT AS WELL WHEN THERE!!
I don't know what to do - feel soooooooooo miserable (am close to tears typing this!), this isn't a marriage - it's more like a bad tempered house-share!
This is tempting me to comfort eat BUT have decided I have little control in other areas - I WILL TAKE CHARGE OF MY DIET PLAN!!!!!
Don't tell me to ask him to leave - did that a while back and he just refused and said if I wanted to go I could and I should take our kids with me !!! I told him I would NEVER leave this house - a family home is for a FAMILY not one selfish pig headed little ****! (scuse my language!!!) I would not uproot my kids and squish them into a room at my parents while he lanquished in several rooms....... so we have a standoff!!!
He wants us to be physical - I don't feel I want to be physical (apart from bash him one!!!) with someone who comes in from work, has dinner then goes to bedroom to play computer games til kids are in bed then comes down when I go up or when kids are in bed......no conversation when down with me THEN in the night expects some ACTION!!!!! C'mon get real!!! BUT he says if he doesn't get his 'desserts' why should he make an effort with HIS/OUR kids??!?!???!! BUT THEN when I have 'provided' he hasn't made 1% more effort.
Anyway better stop this rant now before your eyes start to bleed
Jill
Anyway - when they were up there Amber kept texting me telling me Dean was slagging me off to his Mum and those friends - he was calling me lazy saying he had tested me in the past leaving litter somewhere and finding it still there when he got home (????), said I had a bad attitude, said that he suspected me of having an affair (???), then also told his mate how a while back he had gone to a swingers party but told me he was on call out !!!!!
I told Amber to ignore his comments and how he must've been showing off etc infront of his mates (shame our kids had to hear it though!!!!)........
Course then they arrive home...Sunday afternoon, Dean comes up to me and says "Are you going to stop being so shitty? give me a cuddle then!" - I couldn't dob in the girls for their texts (Aimee had sent a couple too) so I was internally seething by this point......... I gave him a peck on the cheek but he seemed desperately trying to spoil for a fight......everything I said he nitpicked at....
Anyway last night in bed I confronted him over swingers party bit but he told me it was his mate who told him he'd done it - when Dean at work today I again asked the girls and both were 100% positive Dean had said it.
Then last night Ernie (my beloved car) packed in - usually Dean would check and try to fix it but was in such a bad mood I didn't ask and he never offered. Breakdown brought us home which helped tho....
Today he comes home from work and goes to look at ernie but then suggests driving him a long distance to see if it leaks!!!! I was told NOT to drive him as could cause other engine damage - he throws a tantrum and says he won't look anymore....... also refused to pick up a Freecycle I'd arranged on Friday evening.....MEN!!!!!
SO I said I'd find a mechanic to come out and fix Ernie (my parents have offered to lend me the money as obviously I need the car!) - Dean then launches into how as I am fulltime Mum/Housewife (allbeit trying to find a job to fit round school hours...) the money coming in was HIS and how HE didn't want me wasting it on Mechanic and would rather see it rust on drive!!!!!!
STUFF THAT!!!! So tomorrow I AM looking for a mechanic - he had his chance today and tantrumed out of it, Michael will be missing a meet n greet at zoo tomorrow as need a car to get there and Wednesday 4Arms from Ben10 is there who michael has been counting down the days to seeing - I will not let Dean power kick Michael into missing out!!!! IF I can get ernie fixed tomorrow then SOD HIM I will!
He infuriates me soooooooo much, he moans about what he hasn't got in life ie money, flash car etc BUT NEVER sees what he has got.
Worrying me tho is we have CadburyWorld at end of this month so need Ernie in tiptop condition as over 3 hour drive!!!!!
Sorry to have this rant but just need it off my chest - he is denying the Swinger party, he denies the calling me lazy etc yet both girls have quoted the same to me separately..........
I wish the girls hadn't texted me so I'd have been blissfully ignorant!
Amber keeps telling me I can do better than him and to chuck him out / divorce him ... so sad to hear your kid say that to you!!!
Years back I tried chucking him out - he took a bag drove off then rang me 15 mins later to tell me he'd crashed into the back of another car so was on way home!!!! OH , AND HE TOLD HIS MATE THAT AS WELL WHEN THERE!!
I don't know what to do - feel soooooooooo miserable (am close to tears typing this!), this isn't a marriage - it's more like a bad tempered house-share!
This is tempting me to comfort eat BUT have decided I have little control in other areas - I WILL TAKE CHARGE OF MY DIET PLAN!!!!!
Don't tell me to ask him to leave - did that a while back and he just refused and said if I wanted to go I could and I should take our kids with me !!! I told him I would NEVER leave this house - a family home is for a FAMILY not one selfish pig headed little ****! (scuse my language!!!) I would not uproot my kids and squish them into a room at my parents while he lanquished in several rooms....... so we have a standoff!!!
He wants us to be physical - I don't feel I want to be physical (apart from bash him one!!!) with someone who comes in from work, has dinner then goes to bedroom to play computer games til kids are in bed then comes down when I go up or when kids are in bed......no conversation when down with me THEN in the night expects some ACTION!!!!! C'mon get real!!! BUT he says if he doesn't get his 'desserts' why should he make an effort with HIS/OUR kids??!?!???!! BUT THEN when I have 'provided' he hasn't made 1% more effort.
Anyway better stop this rant now before your eyes start to bleed
Jill