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Humiliated by consultant

Jesca

Full Member
S: 23st9.5lb C: 23st9.5lb G: 21st3lb BMI: 51.9 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#1
I just wanted to vent about this really, I don't find my consultant inspiring at all, in fact she has gained several stone of weight in the 5 years I've been going to her class and she clearly has no idea how to answer when we ask questions.

In the last year I've only been the class a few times as I find it's easier for me if I don't go and my weight loss has been going just the same as when I was attending class (not losing much but not gaining either), I've only stayed with her class as her classes are the least popular in my town and it's quick to get weighed and leave.

Last week I went in to weigh, I was feeling very tired, had greasy hair and no make-up, I remarked to her that I was very tired and needed to just get home and sleep as I wasn't feeling up to staying but I'd try the following week (which I did mean). She then asked if I could stay for a minute for a chat, I said ok thinking she was going to have a word with me for never staying.

Instead she says good evening to the class and draws attention to me as apparently I'm the biggest loser, a title I hardly feel I deserve since I've lost 2.5 stone in 2 years and still weigh nearly 21 stone, so not really a rapid or 'look at the difference' loss (not at my weight anyway).

She has known me for 5 years and knows I always hate this sort of thing, I'm fine in IMAGE therapy as no more attention is drawn to me than anyone else and also if I'm staying, I'll have made sure I look alright with make-up and decent hair/clothes.

She made a real spectacle of me in front of three of my friends and a room full of almost complete strangers, I was trying to get away asap without being rude but she wouldn't let up, asking me to tell 'my story' and asking if people had questions, I was internally screaming and hating every single second, I think everyone else could tell so they didn't ask any questions. Then she wanted a bl00dy photo! It was at that point I said categorically no, made my excuses as politely as I could and left.

The extra embarrassment was the flamin' sash thing didn't even fit around me! I'm not someone who's easily embarrassed but I felt thoroughly humiliated by this, so much so that I'm changing groups permanently and won't ever be returning to her group.

I know some might see this as an overreaction but imagine how you'd feel with a whole group staring at you when you feel like hell and leave feeling upset and thoroughly made a fool of. I think all consultants should do this only with your permission, it's only a nice surprise when you like surprises like this!!
 
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Emmaline

Hippety Hop!
S: 16st2lb C: 14st13.7lb G: 11st0lb BMI: 42.3 Loss: 1st2.3lb(7.21%)
#2
Hi Jesca.. That's such a shame to have been put through that and for her not to see that you were uncomfortable with it is not a good thing for someone who's put in charge especially as she should know what it's like to be in that situation.. I don't blame you for going elsewhere at all!

I'm afraid I have never got on with going to these meetings as I find that most people go with one or two friends and seem to be in their own little cliques and no wanting to mix with those they don't know and the leaders don't encourage them to do otherwise with the result I've felt really out of it.

However, I do hope you get on better in the new group you go to.
All the best to you. :)
 
S: 11st12lb C: 9st4lb G: 9st3lb BMI: 22.3 Loss: 2st8lb(21.69%)
#3
This is awful, you are right to leave her group in fact I would contact head office, maybe not to rant but just tell them how she made you feel x. Hope you find a great consultant. our consultant is Emma Camm, she is amazing, funny and so in tune with what we are all going through and dealing with, she is an amazing support to each and everyone of us. Wishing you well x
 

Jesca

Full Member
S: 23st9.5lb C: 23st9.5lb G: 21st3lb BMI: 51.9 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#4
I have sent a complaint in, I still feel upset even now, worse still I logged in and my 'award' is plastered all over my page and I keep getting emails telling me I need to submit a form to be entered in the finals, I've emailed twice now saying I would prefer not to enter yet they keep badgering me :-(
 
S: 11st4lb C: 10st2lb G: 9st5lb BMI: 25.2 Loss: 1st2lb(10.13%)
#5
That is awful!!! I'm sorry she made you feel like that!! Doesn't sound very professional at all. Well done you for complaining!!
 

Jesca

Full Member
S: 23st9.5lb C: 23st9.5lb G: 21st3lb BMI: 51.9 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#6
I heard back from SW, basically apologising and saying they'd take it up with consultant but the second reply seemed very copy-and-paste, not at all like the first! Oh well!

No FloralFlower, the consultant concerned isn't professional at all really, there have been incidents along the way that made me lose trust/faith but nothing as bad as this x
 
S: 11st4lb C: 10st2lb G: 9st5lb BMI: 25.2 Loss: 1st2lb(10.13%)
#7
I would complain again!! Explain to them you feel its copy and paste!!

The consultant doesn't sound like they should be doing this ... humiliating someone is not giving support to their group!!
 
S: 22st7.5lb C: 19st8lb G: 18st0lb BMI: 45.6 Loss: 2st13.5lb(13.15%)
#8
How awful! I've been to a fair few groups and always end up feeling uncofortable/embarrassed /ashamed... possibly more an issue with me, but I'm certainly put of going to classes and am now trying to go it alone. At least until I'm a little bit more confident in my skin! Good for you for getting yourself away and into another group. X
 

Jesca

Full Member
S: 23st9.5lb C: 23st9.5lb G: 21st3lb BMI: 51.9 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#9
TBH she talks a lot but she doesn't listen, I think that's her problem, she likes to hear her own voice more than anyone else's!
 
S: 18st4lb C: 15st10lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 37.8 Loss: 2st8lb(14.06%)
#10
Maybe she thought that by recognising your achievement she would be encouraging you to participate more than you are? It probably wasn't done with any malice.
 
S: 17st12.0lb C: 15st5.0lb G: 13st0.0lb BMI: 30.8 Loss: 2st7lb(14%)
#12
I totally get what you're saying, I would be devastated. :( I would think about changing groups too.
 
#13
uh that's not nice my consultant is similar first she never remembered me or my name than apparently I was negative from the beginning and didn't want to do it .. each week now she mentions how well I'm doin for someone who didn't want to do it in the first place :/ keep in mind I meet spoken more than 10 words to her .. I smile and just think " stupid bunt"
 


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