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i dont know what to do

I just dont know what to do - i have been trying to organise a surprise holiday for hubby to go to egypt (hes gonna be 50), he thinks we are going camping !
Back in May I asked for respite at our nearest hospice for 2 weeks so that I had those 2 weeks to get a 5/7 day holiday in and wasnt tied down to set dates. Well we was told last week that we can only have Tues till the Sunday so we have been given just 5 nights- I havent asked for any respite this year ,in the hope that I could have those 2 weeks, but oh no cant have them. I cant understand why because all the other kids will be at school and I asked for those dates because of that reason. to say we are P** d off is an understatment - I darent ask them why we cant have those 2 weeks in the fear that they say - if you dont like it ,dont bring him - so I'm stuffed , This means Im gonna have to find a holiday within that week.
But if that wasnt gonna be enough problems --
I just dont know who to turn to at the minute for advise. I am so scared that son will get swine flu. he has really bad scoliosis and has less than 1 lung to breathe with -as the other one is really squashed. he is also severly disabled and if he even gets a slight cough -it can and has turned into phenumonia within 20 mins. I have been thinking about this all morning and wonder if we should not go - because I fell that the minute we go away he will get ill, I have given myself a headache just thinking about it - I did say to hubby last night -that if son got this flu it Will kill him, he just looked at me and he knew. I dont know what to do - I think we all know that it will kill him but everyone is just putting it to the backs of their minds- but I cant im just so scared
what should i do ?
do i tell my doctor my fears?
will he just say wait till he gets it then we will deal with it ?
get the jab - but that means injecting him with the flu and he could have a reaction to it ?
oh god - why me .... I cant handle this again.:cry::cry:
sorry ,but I just dont know what to do, and we are in the same boat here, with the feelings . so to have someone elses advise may help.
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Hugs to you at this time, I really do not know what the best suggestion would be for you. I know how complicated this situation is for you, the only thing to think of is would you really, and I mean really enjoy this holiday if the respite was fixed, or would the worry about the flu ruin it? It is a terrible time for those with loved ones in the risk groups and unless you are in that position it is hard to know what you would do. Can you talk to GP - are they supportive?
What about OH can you talk to him about your plan - I know it was meant to be a surprise, but maybe he is feeling the same as you.
I probably have not been much help, but I hope this all works out for you and your family x


Bears dont dig on dancin'
Hi, just wanted to send you some *hugs*!! I can't begin to imagine how hard some of the decisions are you have to make, and how many worried you have on a daily basis. I'm sure there will be some people along with great advice, just wanted to show you some support. Xxx


Silver Member
awww hun,you sound in a right state x
with regards to the respite(if you still want it)i'd tell them your not happy and the reason you want it.they may be able to sort something out for you.i had the same problems with where my daughter goes and i explained why i needed certain dates and they were great and changed things for us.if you dont ask again youll never know x
now i'm not sure about the swine flu situation but i'm sure you could speak to your sons consultant for reassurance and advice.they will understand your concerns and be able to tell you what your next step should be regarding the vaccine etc.
i hope things start to look up for you.try not to stress about things and find out for sure your options and youll feel alot better being more informed x