I HATE MYSELF. :cry::cry::cry: I have been struggling for days now with hunger. I have just sat and ate a full tin of PEK chopped pork. I opened the tin, knowing exactly what I was doing, and enjoyed every mouthful. I feel sick I am so full. It was the best thing I had in the house ie. non carb as I was looking for minimal damage. I WANTED toast with butter and knew I was going to eat something, so ate the meat. I wanted to 'chew' so I had a bar first. I have been trying to keep off them as much as possible but just needed to eat. Does anyone understand this feeling or is it just me?
Did I enjoy it? Yes
Do I feel full? Yes
Do I feel good? No
Do I regret it? Yes
I have posted this exact message on my diary thread too so I can see it every day to remind me how terrible I feel right now.
Tomorrow is going to be hard again, I have tasted food and that is the beginning of a downward spiral for me. I want to cry but I also want to continue eating. I admire anyone who can do this 100% for 100 or so days.
Did I enjoy it? Yes
Do I feel full? Yes
Do I feel good? No
Do I regret it? Yes
I have posted this exact message on my diary thread too so I can see it every day to remind me how terrible I feel right now.
Tomorrow is going to be hard again, I have tasted food and that is the beginning of a downward spiral for me. I want to cry but I also want to continue eating. I admire anyone who can do this 100% for 100 or so days.