I need some input please??!!

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Poppysparkle, 16 March 2009 Social URL.

  1. Poppysparkle

    Poppysparkle Silver Member

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    Some honest advice required!!

    Had a weekend of people (my parents and sister) telling me that I need to stop now, then today in work someone who has previously lost a lot of weight on LL and kept it off for the past year said to me "you've reached goal now then and are eating?", to which I replied "no, I still have 5lb to go", to which she just responded "ooh, hmm" and pulled her mouth to one side. I could tell that she didn't want to say anything more, as she would remember what it was like when you are getting these comments, but I'm now worrying.

    I was really, really hungry today and ate my bar earlier than usual, then about 4pm felt ravenous again, but have lasted out until my soup which I had at 7pm and will have a further shake about 10pm.

    I don't know if this is real hunger and my body telling me to eat, or whether it's psychological because of what people have been saying and because I'm so close.

    I'm scared to stop on the one hand, and worried that I'll go a bit too low when I start RTM, but I want to complete the goal I set myself.

    Please can you look at my pics I posted of my night out on Saturday, which are in my album, and tell me your honest opinion?? Do I still look healthy, or would you be worried?? I know from experience that the mirror doesn't tell the truth from when I was in denial about being as fat as I was and not recognising this completely!

    I'm not saying I'll stop, but I'd be really grateful for any advice to help me consider things! I'm so torn with myself - I keep reading that the LLC say you will KNOW when you are ready but I just keep veering from one decision to another and am fighting with myself, but don't know which is the right answer - reach my goal officially (which I know I'll kick myself if I don't, but am 1lb under goal on my scales, but LL says 5lb still to go to 10 stone), or stop now before I get carried away!!

    Thank you in anticipation of the marvellous advice that you always supply!! ;)
     
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  3. lucylastic

    lucylastic Silver Member

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    Hi Poppy

    Can't give you any advice as I haven't been where you are right now, and can't look at your album just yet, but what I can say is that in the photo on your sig - and even more so in the photo you posted of your night out - you look absolutely stunning! I think you have an amazing figure, and you certainly inspire me to carry on.

    Sorry I can't be of more help - but I wanted you to know you look absolutely fantastic! :)
     
  4. saz343

    saz343 Full Member

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    You are looking fantastic! And healthy. The only thing I would be worried about are all them turning heads looking at the stunner walking down the street!
    I think if you feel happier to lose 5lb more than do it.
    You are looking fab! Well done you!
     
  5. rachee29

    rachee29 Full Member

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    i stopped before my goal because of the reasons you are talking about just under a stone below i have lost a further 4 and a half lbs in rtm just going into wk4 and think it was the best decision i made i think you look fab and very slim but this does have to be your decision
     
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  6. Poppysparkle

    Poppysparkle Silver Member

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    Thanks girls - really appreciate the lovely comments, but also LS, I do take your point - thing is that I'm pretty happy to stay this size as I'm 10-12 now, but I just don't want to get any bigger at all, so think I need a bit of a cushion of safety!

    I am getting daily headaches, which I wasn't getting before and am drinking the same water, so it's not that - would this be related to me not eating still do you think??
     
  7. Poppysparkle

    Poppysparkle Silver Member

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    No, never done milk week. Maybe if I do stay on next week I'll do that then - not really sure what it is though!!
     
  8. roundrachel

    roundrachel Silver Member

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    it's a really tricky time as you get so close to RTM. It's so close you can taste it...literally!
    I'm only speaking from personal experience as we've all had different experiences on LL but I feel I went to RTM about 3 weeks to early and really struggled to get the last bit off. I do wish I'd not gone along with my friend to RTM and stuck it out a bit longer. I did put weight on and ended up needing to lose about a stone (having had xmas to deal with too!) I did have to work my butt off to get it off but given that I had the energy to exercise it made it easier and it took me about 4 weeks.
    Don't let ANYONE make the decision for you. You'll know what's right. And if it's not the right decision you'll know, and you'll adapt and change to make it work for you. You're a lighter lifer for life now! I still go to meetings to get weighed and manage myself.
    You'll do great...you're looking FAB lovely lady! xx
     
  9. daisydoll

    daisydoll Gold Member

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    hi poppy
    i think you are looking fab

    it does sound as if you're ready for RTM tho.

    you can always get rid of the 5lbs after if you are set on reaching a certain weight.

    daisy x
     
  10. slendablenda

    slendablenda Gold Member

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    Hi Poppy

    You must do what feels right for you. If you are not feeling well youneed to speak to your LLC or LL medical team I would say. Your health has to take priority over whether you look 5lbs less or not.
    Your pictures look absolutely gorgeous You look healthy and happy to me. But remember you are doing this for you, not what everyone else thinks.
    I did persevere until I got to the goal I had set myself.I did it because I wanted a half stone buffer zone. I have just ocmpleted RTM. I did fluctuate a bit depending on which week I was doing. Up and down about 1-2 lbs. Iam the same this week as I was in mid December. I'm very happy with it and just below my goal weight. I am sure you will decide what is best for you.
    Good luck. xxx:)
     
  11. Poppysparkle

    Poppysparkle Silver Member

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    Thanks SB - no, not feeling ill and I think I'm going to carry on to goal after reading all the advice. I know when I read Daisy saying I could always get rid of the 5lb later, my instant reaction was "no, I need to do it now I think or I'll regret it", so I think I'm going on that gut instinct.

    The headaches could be tension, as I do have sore neck muscles at the moment and could really do with visiting the osteopath again.

    I'm keeping on going and not going to stop until LL scales register my 10 stone weight. I'll feel more relaxed going into RTM then.

    Thanks for reading all of you as you've all definitely helped get it straight in my head!
     
  12. Foxtrot

    Foxtrot Is back in the saddle!

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    Glad that's sorted then. :D

    You do look fab though. ;)
     
  13. Minerva

    Minerva ...passing through.

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    Poppy in the photos you posted you look absolutely healthy! The only reason everyone says 'Haven't you lost enough now?' is because they're still comparing your current image to the one they had of you at the beginning. If you put the two together (like in your signature) and have that mental picture of someone else - you'd probably tell them the same thing. It's not a personal outlash to you personally, it's just the way people perceive things I guess.
    I think quite a few of us never reach 'goal' because of off-hand comments like that. Other people don't seem to realise how sensitive we - the weight-losers - are about our weight. The ones who have lost a lot I think are the most vulnerable because they can't actually SEE themselves anymore. I still have to ask my OH as to what my body shape is most like from random women on the street.

    If you feel like you want to lose another 5 lbs, then go for it! You will feel the completion in your head if you do it. I stopped LL with about 7lbs still to go until my original goal... and I felt miserable because I never achieved it, so I restarted the program a few months later. The last few pounds are ALWAYS the hardest - because it's human nature to cut corners, and say 'it's good enough!'.
    HOWEVER, like in Andy's case, he is truly happy where he got to now because his goal weight has slowly been decreasing with more weight that he lost. I guess he was working by the principle of how he feels about himself... he feels READY to do RTM. Do you feel ready?

    Another point is: You won't necessarily lose anything in RTM. I didn't... Some people lose lots. In fact, you will put 'water weight' back on (lots of people panic when this happens)... and then, for about a month after RTM I personally put some weight back on even while eating sensibly.. I assume my body was getting 'adjusted' back into a sense of normality.

    It's your call - but NEVER let anyone tell you that you look ill, or whatever... No. I get told I look ok now... But I just nod and smile. I don't really care - I know my goal and I want to see it this time. An opinion is just that.... an opinion. Surely YOUR opinion counts more to you than other people's? They aren't you. They aren't living your life... So take their comments at face value, and don't let them go any further.
     
  14. slendablenda

    slendablenda Gold Member

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    Wise words Minerva

    I agree with you. I also know that for me I would not have felt I'd completed my LL weight loss until Ihad reached the goal I had set myself and I thought "what difference does another couple of weeks matter in the great scheme of what I've just been doing?" I had also decided I wanted a half stone buffer in case I did put on as Min described.
    So far so good, but I know it's not over. I'm just in the next phase.

    Foundation - Developers - RTM - M! (the challenge for life).
     
  15. Poppysparkle

    Poppysparkle Silver Member

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    Thanks for the further input.

    I'm so glad that I'd made a proper decision last night with your help to put it all in perspective. Just mentioned on H's thread re the negative comments that the horrible woman who told me I was going to look ugly, and that I looked nice until a few weeks previously said to me "hello lollipop head". I was rather annoyed at her and just thought how blooming rude can one person be??!! However, as I've made that decision to keep going because it's the right thing for me, it didn't send me straight to the shop for a bar of chocolate (not that it ever would now, but in the past things would have been different!).

    I'm keeping on keeping on.....
     
  16. slendablenda

    slendablenda Gold Member

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    :happy096::girlpower::superwoman::nightf:
     
  17. thin_inside

    thin_inside I Can Do This!

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    Poppy - pleased for you that the decision is made and you recognise the comments for what they are. All the best in getting to goal and through RTM. Onward ->
     
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  19. pete10141748

    pete10141748 Postaholic

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    My mum says this to me too! She reckon's I've got "quite a large head and if (you) lose any more weight you will look 'all out of proportion' "

    Now if that ain't b*llocks/crooked thinking then what is!!!


    As for that last 5lbs, best to weigh up pro's and con's I reckon.

    Pro's
    Get to the goal you set yourself - mentally happy :)
    Have a little extra 'leeway' when it comes to RTM and gaining a few lbs back :)


    Con's
    Feeling rougher than before during last few weeks
    This last 5lbs probably isn't going to make much difference in terms of dress size/how you look physically


    The idea of the milk week sounds a good one, I think I am going to do one very soon too, just to give my body something a bit 'extra' for a change. After all, you and I have done this for the same time (I think!) and 20 weeks is a long time to be abstinant (especially as the N.I.C.E guidelines tell people that every 12 weeks has to be a milk week or a week off from a VLCD!)

    I know I repeat this phrase a lot lately, but it's at the co0re of how I keep going now ; listen to your body. If it tells you you are done, then agree with it - fighting against it will only make things 1000x harder!


    EDIT: PS forgot to say, re: the photo's you look fantastic and healthy! So don't worry yourself on that front :)
     
  20. slendablenda

    slendablenda Gold Member

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    I did full abstinence for 10 months. Decided not to do milk week, didn't want to rock the boat while it was going so well.
    I'm really glad about it because one of the ladies from my group has never got back on track since.
    Until last year there never was a milk week.
     
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