• Upgrades have been completed! Including conversations, 😁😎🏀⚾⚽ Emojis and more.. Read more



I wish I hadn't...

emmapetty

Going for Goal!
#1
I wish I hadn't come off CD over Christmas :cry:

Eventhough over Christmas I was very good and only managed to gain 4lbs, since then I have struggled to get back on track :sigh:

Yep I admit I have avoided the forum, and here I am again hanging my head in shame :(

For the past 2 weeks I have eaten a disgusting amount of rubbish, resulting in a 8lb gain :cry::cry::cry:

Admittedly I have been very stressed out with moving home, which I can happily say went very smoothly and we are now in our new home, although surrounded by boxes.

The truth is, each day I have been going to the shop and buying sweets, choc and other ridiculous things and consuming the lot. :jelous: Resulting in me regretting what I have done in the evening and self loathing every morning.

I feel as fat as ever if the truth be known. The past 3 nights I have been crying in the bath (HB is unaware of my blipping as I feel very ashamed) and have permanent headaches and sluggishness. :mad:

I still have roughly 5 days worth of CD packs, and every night I say "I'll start tomorrow" then something finds it's way into my mouth...

Saying this I am absolutely sick to the back teeth of playing mind games with myself, and want to STOP this right now and get back on the waggon. I have 4 stone to loose and I'm not caving now, no way, I have come far too far to undo my hard work. On top of this I have spent a lot on paying for the diet and I won't let it go to waste.

Therefore tomorrow is day 1 for me. I am going to take each day as it comes. The Wii fit body test in going to stop until I am in the routine of CD and can cope with whatever the scales say. :eek:

Here's to kicking my bottom well into gear and carrying on making those positive changes and loosing those lbs :D:D:D

Hugs x x x
 
Get Rid of this ad and join in on the conversation for free today! Tap here!
#2
Welcome back Emma and good luck tomorrow!
As you know you are not alone,I am finding weekends hard and am still a pound heavier than before I had my 2 wk xmas break.
Hugs x
 
#3
aww, really touched by your message. get back on track girl but first make sure your head is in the right place. good luck and nice to see you back on here!
 

fed-up-and-fat

hoping for a good loss
#4
Hey Emma. Don't worry about the weight gain, look on it as a good thing. Having been a bit naughty and gained a bit you know how awful it makes you feel and how bloated and sluggish your body feels. Try and remember those feelings each time you want to put something into your mouth.

Have you thought about writing out a list of reasons to get back on the plan and lose the weight ? Might help motivate you.

You jabe done so well so far hunni and it must be really hard getting back into the plan when having had a break for Christmas, especially when you ahve had a house move as well.

Hugs hun, we are all here to help you through

Charlie xx
 

fed-up-and-fat

hoping for a good loss
#5
Also meant to say..........
any more of this :eatdrink051:and I will come and do this :asskick: missie

Charlie xx
 
#6
Good luck emma on your restart!! it took a little bit of kick ass to get me back in gear, i'm back i'd say 95% but i still have a little bit of slipnfall once in a while... We can beat this, we really can do it!!!
 
#7
Good Luck Emma, im sure your do just fine. it was hard for me too get my head back in the right place after coming off over christmas, but its gotta be done and you can do anything you put your mind too,

we all believe in you dont give up hun, as you said alot of money has been invested, why let it go to waste ??

x
 
#8
haha love the ':eatdrink051:' icon - I do that :p

Dont feel to bad about the weight gain, give it a short time and the weight will go again, at least you have made the effort to get back into it and the first step is getting back on here and looking up your CDC again, support is always here :D

This forum helped me loads in the early days when I did CD before, hence why I'm hanging around here now. I'm eating today, but have had guests today as well and have eaten a shameful amout of biscuits. Which I WILL throw in the bin after OH gets home and has his one or two.

Best of luck x
 
#9
Hello Emma

Firstly, well done on such a minimal gain over the Christmas season, which demonstrates that you have willpower and determination.

Moving home is such a stressful event - I know that with your psychology background you will be familiar with the research that puts it right up there with divorce, redundancy etc! So, well done on getting the worst of the move out of the way and good luck with a successful re-start. You have been missed here (there's a thread in your honour!) - you are as human as the rest of us and have had a short, difficult time. Best of luck, you can do it x
 
#10
Hiya Emma

Been wondering where you've been... so pleased that your house move went well! I hope you'll be very happy in your new home.

I feel so sad that you have been feeling that way. I know what you are going through, and it is rubbish.

I hate it how we can be so decieving... i never pick or eat anything i shouldn't when my partner is around. I hate him working late shifts because I cannot be trusted not to eat rubbish (well, only when my head is in the shed - when i'm on CD 100% - i'm fine).

You know you can do this Emma. I give myself these talks all the time, but until the time is right to start again, i might as well be talking to the wall.

Life is too short for us to be fat and miserable - because at the moment, that's where we are. And we deserve better than that, dammit!!

Come on Emma!! Don't feel bad. When I weighed after Christmas - well middle of January - I couldn't even look at the scales, and I left my card with my CDC. That's how bad it was for me. You are certainly not alone!

Take care sweetie.
Lynne
x
 

Madferret

Mad as a Hatter
#11
Welcome back...you have been missed..

I am on my numerous restart - day 1 today... we are only human, and will have blips and trips.. it's what we do about them that makes us stand out from the crowd...

Take care and good luck for tomorrow
 
#12
Emma Emma Emma....its a story we can all relate to, me more than most because i too avoided the forum. I was ill last week, so ill so that doesnt count but before that for honestly days I just couldnt get my head around it. I couldnt work out how i could go days of just eating 400 cals happily, to being able to eat that on one part of a snack....and were it not for a fabulous friend whose doing cambridge i probably would be doing that today but she reminded me of somthing.

This is our decision to shine. We decided that we wanted to be slim and healthy and change our lives and only we can do that. The chocolate, or whatever your vice is (mines crumpets) may seem nice at the time....but look at what we are putting ourselves through as a result. Hating ourselves, berating ourselves.....punishing ourselves for food! Its not the relationship to have with yourself.

Just say to yourself....i will be the weight i want to be by: (said date)
Envisage what you will look like, be wearing, feel like.....and dont let a molecule of good or bad food- nothing but shakes pass your lips!

Much love, and please dont torture yourself. Your human, we like food! its not unusual or anything to feel bad about. Tomorrow is your day! Let us know how its going xxx
 
#13
Emma really just forget about the blip and get back on it - I'm one of those (one of many) who have had a blip, gained a few pounds, felt bad and wanted to start dieting again but haven't and have ended up piling loads of weight on and I would so hate to see that happen to you.

Moving house along with getting married/losing someone you love is one of the most stressful times so just accept that you've done what you needed to and now move on ----- eat well (healthily) for the rest of today and as of the morning you're back on the wagon - that weight wil be gone by the end of week 1!

xx
 
#14
hi emma, i posted on here a few days ago saying "wheres emma petty?" i miss reading your inspiring posts!
im finding post xmas hard also and am nibbling here and there, its so hard, maybe we can kick each others ass and support each other through hard times. we've done it before 100% so we should do it again. moving is so stressful, hope it went well, and good on you for deciding to get back on cd wagon tommorow, we're all here for you hun xx
 
#15

BubblyPenguin

Recovering Foodaholic
#16
Hey Emma, you can do it- you've taken the first step in reposting here (glad the move has gone well by the way). It's taken me a couple of weeks to get my head in the right place after Christmas- once those barriers lift for a wee while it's hard to get out of it. I keep telling myself how miserable I am when I cheat and that seems to be helping. Also having broken my shakes in half and having regualr portions is so much better for me personally. Take one day at a time, don't set the bar too high...aim for one day, take it in steps- breakfast, get to lunch, aim for dinner and enjoy taking control by remembering how good it feels and how much better it will be to get a new item another dress size down. Glug, glug, glug...you can do it!!!
 


Similar threads