I'm annoyed!

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by ladypancho, 23 April 2010 Social URL.

  1. ladypancho

    ladypancho Full Member

    Posts:
    60
    Likes Received:
    2
    I have been doing well with SW, lost 2st 10lb in 14 wks, got slimmer of the week loads of times, slimmer of the month for 2 months, which is great. But, I was having a chat with a non SW friend and I was saying that I feel people at my group are waiting for me to slip up or fail. We had a good chat about it and I came to the conclusion that I was imagining it and why would these people feel like that about me?
    Well, had WI last night and every week after I get weighed this one woman inparticular always says 'well, how have you done?, Oh, don't tell me 2lb?'. She said it again last night and I said no half a lb this week and the cheeky basket actually cheered, put her hand to her mouth and said 'oh sorry' and laughed. I didn't think it was funny, I felt lie slapping her. It has made me feel on a downer now and feel lie I don't want to go to class now.
    Sorry think I am just feeling sorry for myself cause that woman upset me a bit.
    sue x
     
  2. Avatar

    MiniMins.com Matched Content

  3. not_lar_croft

    not_lar_croft Silver Member

    Posts:
    719
    Likes Received:
    28
    Start Weight:
    18st13lb
    Current Weight:
    18st0lb
    Goal Weight:
    14st4lb
    Lost(%):
    0st13lb(4.91%)
    Diet:
    SW
    That sounds like a bit of jealousy to me? You should be proud of your losses and ignore any comments that people make. I lost 1/2lb this week and am proud that it still a step in the right direction. What is her weightloss like?

    Otherwise is there a class near by that you can change to?

    I would just ignore it and keep losing just to rub her nose in it and anyone else who is small minded enough to have an attitude like that?

    :O
     
  4. raquel

    raquel pink lady

    Posts:
    525
    Likes Received:
    10
    Start Weight:
    0st13.1lb
    Current Weight:
    0st13.1lb
    Goal Weight:
    0st10.7lb
    Lost(%):
    0st0lb(0%)
    Diet:
    w/w
    Sorry to hear that, when i did s/world about 8yrs ago i was like you lost every single week, never a gain lost over 4 stone in less than 9mths, and was put in for the slimming woman of the year, which i came runner up, instead of my class being nice to me, they were horrid, they used to say why dont you go and eat a good meal, your too thin, every week was dreadful, i felt i was being picked on big time, i gave up class, i wish id have stayed, i put all my weight back on and ive been at my new group 11 weeks, and have lost every week, im not giving up, and nore am i stopping my class.... im there for me to learn to maintaine my wonderful loss and to keep it off, so this time no body is going to say anything to upset me.... after all they are just jealous... just smile and be proud, i am, x
     
  5. eternity

    eternity Gold Member

    Posts:
    1,926
    Likes Received:
    79
    Start Weight:
    16st6lb
    Current Weight:
    9st6lb
    Goal Weight:
    9st6lb
    Lost(%):
    7st0lb(42.61%)
    Badges:
    Maintainer
    Diet:
    SW
    She sounds horrid!
    There are lots of people who want you to fail because it'll make them feel better about their failures. But there are more people who wish they were losing as well as you and are happy for you. They are the ones that matter. Ignore Mrs. Miserable.
    Well done on your weight loss :)
     
  6. louisedan

    louisedan Gold Member

    Posts:
    1,906
    Likes Received:
    21
    Diet:
    slimming world
    Head up ,belly in and trample the little s**ts into the ground where they belong.They're supposed to help you not act like that. Loose some more and show em whose winning.
     
  7. Going2be*fab*at40

    Going2be*fab*at40 Silver Member

    Posts:
    1,187
    Likes Received:
    35
    Start Weight:
    8st13lb
    Current Weight:
    9st0lb
    Goal Weight:
    8st10lb
    Lost(%):
    -0st1lb(-0.8%)
    Diet:
    Fabulous Slimming World
    Please do your best to ignore them.

    I had a similar experience, one person in my class is highly competitive and as I've lost every week, I felt as though they were waiting for me to 'fail'. I felt under so much pressure that I took myself out of class for a couple of weeks (but still followed the plan).

    What I realised in that time, is that I should just ignore what was going on - this is about me after all and not them.

    Keep your head up and rise above it.
     
  8. Michelle27

    Michelle27 Member

    Posts:
    40
    Likes Received:
    5
    Start Weight:
    16st5lb
    Current Weight:
    11st6lb
    Goal Weight:
    9st0lb
    Lost(%):
    4st13lb(30.13%)
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    That's awful and definately out of jealousy! Groups are supposed to be about support not competition!
    Whatever you do, do not stop going to a group- if that's how that group make you feel then find a new one but don't jepordise your weight loss for anyone!
    You've done absolutely fantastic to lose so much, if you stop going to a group then you will put on what you've lost and more.
     
  9. Moo85

    Moo85 Full Member

    Posts:
    183
    Likes Received:
    4
    Start Weight:
    11st4lb
    Current Weight:
    10st0lb
    Goal Weight:
    9st2lb
    Lost(%):
    1st4lb(11.39%)
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    I think the reason she said it was probably just that you have done so consistently well with great losses every week and getting slimmer of the week all the time that she was probably a bit jealous. It might be that people perhaps think you dont have to work hard at this because you never seem to slip up, so a smaller loss made them feel as if you were 'human' and made them feel better because they haven't been getting the results you have! It might not have been meant in a really nasty way (some people just haven't got a clue how they come across).
    It would be a real shame for you to leave your group over someone like that - she is either a bit intimidated by how well you have done or expressed it in the wrong way, or just a b*tch, in which case do what the others have said!!! well done on such a good weight loss :)
     
  10. Happy Holidays

    Happy Holidays Gold Member

    Posts:
    18,586
    Likes Received:
    134
    Start Weight:
    9st11lb
    Current Weight:
    8st9lb
    Goal Weight:
    8st9lb
    Lost(%):
    1st2lb(11.68%)
    Badges:
    Maintainer
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    I'd ask her the same question there will come a week when she has gained, that will be your opportunity to gasp & show how shocked you are & remind her of her weight losses so far & keep asking her & keep reminding her of her losses, evenutally she'll stop asking you.
     
  11. julie19

    julie19 Silver Member

    Posts:
    1,152
    Likes Received:
    38
    Goal Weight:
    10st0lb
    Diet:
    Slimmingworld
    What a jealous cow!!! I can see why you wouldn't want to go to class anymore, don't stop going though because of her, have a private chat with your C and explain how you are feeling & see what she says. There are a group of us at our group that have been going for a long time and we are all at (or nearly at) target and we make fun of each others losses & gains each week but there is no way we would do it to anyone else in the group and anyone who consistently loses is obviously doing it right & following the plan & should be lauded not slagged off!
     
  12. Snow_Fairy

    Snow_Fairy Member

    Posts:
    28
    Likes Received:
    1
    Start Weight:
    18st0lb
    Current Weight:
    18st0lb
    Goal Weight:
    12st0lb
    Lost(%):
    0st0lb(0%)
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    She sounds like she has some serious self esteem issues to me!! I have encountered people like this and I tend to avoid them as far as possible, however I'm going to go to my first SW class on Monday after doing SW and WW at home so I hope I don't meet anyone like that because my reason for going is to look for a bit of support! Could you have a quiet word with your consultant and let her know how you are feeling? She may be able to get people discussing in the group how you can best support each other rather than being jealous and competitive.

    Well done on your fantastic weight loss so far, and don't let this sad lady take the shine off your achievement!

    xx
     
  13. dehli

    dehli Silver Member

    Posts:
    1,008
    Likes Received:
    14
    Start Weight:
    13st9lb
    Current Weight:
    12st3lb
    Goal Weight:
    10st0lb
    Lost(%):
    1st6lb(10.47%)
    Diet:
    slimming world
    It's definitely jealousy, try and take no notice. I remember going to sw one time and there was a woman who did fantastically well every week, e.g. 5 pound losses, and she won slimmer of the week all the time. On the one hand I was really pleased for her, but it did make my meagre losses seem insignificant. She also wouldn't share her secret, but I found out from a mutual friend that she was only eating once a day. Maybe if she'd been honest and told us how she'd done it I wouldn't have felt like that. Anyway, jealousy is a nasty emotion but we're all human.
     
  14. *Emsie*

    *Emsie* Gold Member

    Posts:
    21,556
    Likes Received:
    95
    Diet:
    Slimming World from home
    People are unbelievable sometimes! I suppose jealousy is a natural emotion but its how we deal with it and even if she was feeling that way she either shouldn't show it or should be honest with you and say in a polite way how she feels!
    Hope you can face group next week and I for one hope you have a fantastic loss next week! x
     
  15. Lexie_dog

    Lexie_dog UNLEASHING THE BEAST!

    Posts:
    3,741
    Likes Received:
    110
    Start Weight:
    15st12.5lb
    Current Weight:
    15st9lb
    Goal Weight:
    11st0lb
    Lost(%):
    0st3.5lb(1.57%)
    Diet:
    SW, minimal bread!
    I will say though you are going for yourself, to better yourself, to make yourself happier. Who cares what she thinks?

    She sounds bitter and petty. Maybe her own losses haven't been great and she's transferring her disappointment onto you. I would have replied very calmly "well to be fair I've been really going well, and it would have been unrealistic to expect it to go without any bumps, but I still lost half a pound and I'm proud of that. How did you do?"

    Rise above my friend, you'll be at goal happy and confident in yourself, knowing that you did it!

    Go back to that meeting with your head held high and don't worry about what the woman, or anyone else thinks. :D Chin up :D
     
  16. Gettingthinnerbytheday

    Gettingthinnerbytheday Gold Member

    Posts:
    2,038
    Likes Received:
    29
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    Jealousy can be very cruel IMO!!

    I agree - hold your head high next week & don't let it drag you down. I too have had some great losses & won SOTW many times & SOTM. My C even says well we know its getting boring but we all know who the SOTW goes to again this week!

    My losses have slowed down now though & so others are getting it each week so thats good.

    Don't let the green eyed monster spoil your fab results honey x
     
  17. Mrs V

    Mrs V Loves Life!

    Posts:
    7,607
    Likes Received:
    281
    Start Weight:
    21st7lb
    Current Weight:
    12st5lb
    Goal Weight:
    11st0lb
    Lost(%):
    9st2lb(42.52%)
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    Yup, definitely a case of the green eyed monster there Hun. Ignore it. Perhaps she is jealous because she is one of those people that "does everything she can, but seems to sts or gain?" - meaning that she is cheating herself and wont admit to it!!

    You enjoy the fact that you are loosing every week and well done by the way for it!

    Ignore the spiteful comments and just know that you will get to target way before she will.
     
  18. Bashful

    Bashful Slowly Getting There ....

    Posts:
    166
    Likes Received:
    3
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    Oh that is awful :(

    She's only jealous but knowing that doesn't stop it hurting does it?

    *hugs*

    xxx
     
  19. ilovelife

    ilovelife Wishing and hoping!

    Posts:
    3,666
    Likes Received:
    39
    that is awful, you should complain, I know I bloody well would. It's meant to be a support service, not a put down!
     
  20. avisk

    avisk xx

    Posts:
    2,303
    Likes Received:
    92
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    I am not surprised you were upset, but don't let just one person put you off. Anyone who can laugh and cheer at someone else's problems is really beneath contempt. And if you give up, then she will have won - and you don't want that to happen, do you?

    We are very lucky in our group, because we don't seem to have anyone who would not be helpful and supportive when people are not doing well, and absolutely delighted when they are.

    But I suspect that most consultants will have come across this sort of person before, so if you have any more problems with this woman you should talk to your consultant - she will not want to lose a nice, regular, successful, paying customer like yourself! You are a great advert for Slimming World and an asset to your group and to your consultant, so she will want to keep you happy!
     
  21. jaylou

    jaylou Gold Member

    Posts:
    10,819
    Likes Received:
    380
    Was she really being nasty and malicious? Was she just not having a bit of fun? It doesn't sound in the best taste but some people's sense of humour is a little odd to say the least!

    I'm not sure your consultant could do much about it and I'm also not sure a complaint would do any good - you are paying for a support service from your consultant not the other members of the group.

    We have a bit of banter between the long standing members of our group, especially when we say we will lose and then don't, we do berate each other a little but don't mean anything by it.

    I'd say that she is most definitely jealous of your success but don't let that comment, or her upset you. I really don't think people are waiting for you to trip up at all.

    Keep on going, you have done incredibly well.
     
Popular Forums
  1. MiniMins.com is a weight loss support community helping each other on their weight loss journey. We have a multitude of forums, from Slimming World and Exante, to Success Stories. Click the logo at the top right to return to the forum home page at any time.
Loading...