I'm so mixed up

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by Sass, 8 July 2009 Social URL.

  1. Sass

    Sass Silver Member

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    I'v had the worst few days on CD and now i really don't know that this diet is for me.

    I have been on this diet for almost 4 weeks now and every week i have had a blip of some sort, then i managed to pull my socks up and i had a run of 7 days where i was really good. On Saturday i came home after being out and needed food so i was sensible and had some tuna with cauliflower ( crazy mix but all i had in ) Then on sunday we went out as a family for a meal and the cinema. My plan all along was to have a caesar salad without the dressing and the crutons and i hoped that this would keep me in ketosis which ment i was still on plan but just a higher one than ss just for the weekend. So i had my salad but it came out with cheese on which sent the alarm bells ringing but i ate it anyway. After eating the salad it send me on a downward spiral which has got really out of control and i haven't been able to get back to plan at all, monday i didn't have a shake at all and the foods i had just make me want to :cry:.

    Then yesterday after kicking myself up the bum i decided that i had to get back into it so i was really good all day, i'd had my two shakes and i had been drinking lots of water trying to flush all the bad toxins out and then by 9pm in the evening i gave in and ordered a takeaway saying this is to hard to get back into :cry:

    During the night i must have had nightmares about what i had eaten and the fact that i was making the choice to come off CD and try something else eg Atkins, i went on ebay before i ordered my takeaway and bought the books for me to start but now i'm worried that all i was really doing was justifying me having that takeaway. I woke up this morning and my head is all over the place, i really dont know what to do. I'm so unhappy right now.

    I also feel like CD is making me mixed up with regards to food. I'm very aware of whats good and whats bad but this diet seems to make me want to reach out and grab all the bad foods when i blip and something that will keep me on say ss+ or 810 just doesn't seem to satisfy my needs mentally.

    Everything i have writen above is all about the mental effects that this diet is having on me because the physical effects are great its just my head stopping me.

    What i don't like about cd
    1) I have my concerns about me carrying on with cd because i keep blipping right now and i dont like the feeling that i'm wasting money.

    2) I don't like not being able to sit with my family whilst they eat. I mean right now its so hard to sit with them and be happy not eating myself.

    3) I have lack of energy and my moods are all over the place.

    What i like about CD
    1) The weight loss is amazing

    2) once in the zone things get better and i have been in the zone for a short while but it was better than what i keep going through right now.

    3) My clothes are starting to get lose and i can really see what effects CD has had on my body.

    I really cant decided weather CD of Atkins is the way to go, i'm worried about the weight gain if i go to atkins but i do think that once i have got to goal with CD something like atkins would be a good maintaining diet so maybe using it to get to goal isn't such a bad thing. I look at people like jim on the Atkins thread and its amazing what can be done and still be able to eat. I'm leaning towards a trial of Atkins with the view to sorting my head out and then if i'm not happy with the losses and i feel stong enough then come back to CD.

    Can anyone relate to the thought/feelings and actions i'm taking or going through and if so how did you deal with it ?

    All i do know right now is that by xmas i want to be as close to goal as possible, i'm just mixed up as to which road to take.

    Sorry for the long post and the negativity but i really didn't know where else to go to for some great advice, my OH has been great but he has never needed to diet so kinda doesn't have the answers i'm looking for.
     
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  3. deej

    deej Member

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    Sass,

    Sorry to hear you are having such a tough time. CD can be a really tough diet and it souns as though you are amking it very difficult by breaking it. You are right when you say that if you can have a run of a number of days of SS then it gets easier, because you are effectively restarting every week you are going through the worst bit of CD every week.

    I agree with you that you have to have your head in the right place. Do you have the chance to sit somewhere quiet, without distractions, and just think about waht you want to achieve, why and what your time frame is? If you have very clear goals it might makle it easier to stick to whichever plan you choose.

    I am doing SS and I don't sit with my family at mealtimes, I would find that much too difficult. I do miss mealtimes, but it is only for a short while.

    I hope you feel better and can make a decison that works for you. Try to remain positive, you are taking positive steps to lose weight:)
     
  4. Sass

    Sass Silver Member

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    Thanks Deej - I have sat and had some serious thinking time but i end up having a boxing match in my head, its so driving me up the wall and round the bend.
     
  5. Tinka

    Tinka CDC

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    I think the answer is simple to be honest, it is about what you want MORE.
    Is it eating with your family and having more energy right now, or is it losing a stone a month and being slimmer faster?
    If you want the first do something like weightwatchers or slimming world, if it is the later stick to CD with conviction.
    This was the dilema that faced me, and I wanted the later. I couldn't stand the thought of still being big when trying for a baby, or going on holiday. I worked out that by my Aug holiday if I had continued WW I could possibly be about 12st 3lb by the time i went away. I am now 11st 8lb, and STILL have 5 weeks to go. The fact that the CDC said I could be 10st something by my holiday sold it for me. I have been on SS for 6 weeks now.
    Not saying there isn't hard times, but you just have to decide what you want the most.
     
  6. Lisa Claire

    Lisa Claire Full Member

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    I totally understand how you feel, I was doing great until Saturday when I caved in at the end of the day and had KFC and it went downhill from there, kept picking after that, but yesterday I thought to myself if I want to see good results by end of September (going on hols) I have to do this now or its not going to happen and I will end up probably not going away because of how I feel. After yesterday I feel good again today, its just those first initial couple of days getting back to 100% then as you say it gets easier. Only you can decide whats best fo you. Could you not have a soup with your family for dinner and cut a bar up to nibble on during the day? I'm sure you'll do the right thing!!
     
  7. Sass

    Sass Silver Member

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    Tinka - Ideally i want the best of both worlds, that's the problem. The funny thing is that the lose clothes the wi's each week are not enough i don't think to carry me at the moment. I want to be strong and i do want to get to my goals but do i want to do it and be unhappy ?

    Lisa Claire - Well done hun with getting back into it, its so hard when we keep sabotaging our efforts but you are doing really well. Sadly the soup thing is a great idea but i'm not a lover of them so i tend to stick to the shakes and tetra's which i have as ice cream. Once i'm in the zone i can sit with the family and not feel so deprived but its getting to that point each week that's having this effect on me.
     
  8. imagisal

    imagisal Full Member

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    Hi Sass, I can soooo identify with the mental fatigue of over thinking about food, diets, what to do, decisions, decisions, decisions! I had a great start on CD SS and have just come through a two week period where i let a change in routine bring me off plan and the struggle that comes with getting back in to ketosis.
    The main thing about CD for me is that it works if you work the plan...I can't tell you how life changing that is for me as i was unable to lose more than a few pounds with all other diets. It was terrifying to feel like I was on an unstoppable spiral of decline into over eating and weight gain. I know that I have a long journey moving up through the plans and learning to live through healthy eating but for right now...when I get over the initial few days of getting into ketosis Cd gives me rest from overthinking about food and diets.....the rules are simple (not easy) there are not alot of factors about choosing,buying, weighing, cooking etc in a way it is like time out from all that (although I do cook for my daughter). I hope you find your way to your weight loss goals with a way of eating that feels right for you. Sometimes when we are skipping from diet to diet, plan to plan...it is because when we get to that tough place where we want eat something that is not on our 'plan' it's tough and painful ,we still can't accept the rule and forego the food...so we look around for that impossible diet that lets us eat what we want without the pain of changing. Thanks for making me think about CD, it has helped me appreciate the benefits of being back in ketosis!!! Best wishes
     
  9. emmapetty

    emmapetty Going for Goal!

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    Hi Sass,
    I'm so sorry to hear of the difficulties you are having. I also (along with many others I'm sure) have experienced these thoughts. It's very difficult to get in the 'zone' I thought i'd try to help by giving you some ideas to help the 'what you don't like about cd' ...

    1. When you are blipping, it is a real hardship, and the guilt easily comes. I think you would benefit in doing ss+ until you feel you can manage without food.

    I began a 'routine' of my own - I was blipping (take away pizza included!) and becoming very emotional and angry at myself for wasting my money. So I gave myself a real talking to and decided to count the calories of whatever I had eaten (pizza was 650 cals :eek:) so I did no more, but jump on wii fitness training coach, until I had burned those 650 cals. By the end of that day (i'd spaced it out btw!) I was so knackered, it made me think twice before blipping again.

    2. Ok, eating with the family is one that is very hard and completely understandable, the smells, the look of the plate...mmm. If you were wanting to stick with ss 100% I would suggest that during meal times, you could leave the house and do something, whether it's an excersise class, visiting a relative/friend. Just something to tear you away for dinner times.

    If you did the ss+ option, although undoubtably the food you eat will be different from your family, at least you can sit with them and feel you are joining in.

    3. The reason you have a lack of energy is probably the blipping. I was the same, I felt so weak and irratable, my poor HB !!! (not that I'd give him the satisfaction of knowing this!) I hhave been back in ketosis for 2 weeks now after my last blip and feel the complete oposite, enegetic, positive thoughts about my weight lowering etc.

    I have heard that Cognitive Behaviour Therapies can help a lot with our thoughts around food.

    I don't know a lot about the atkins diet, but have heard about it and can't really help on that side of things, but whatever you decide to do, I hope it works out for you lovely. :)

    Big Hugs x x x
     
  10. size 12 wannabe

    size 12 wannabe Member

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    Sounds like me!!!

    I am on day one today but i constantly argue with myself about what is best.

    i have seen me start the day on cambridge slimfasat by lunch then ww by night.

    ha ha
     
  11. Sass

    Sass Silver Member

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    Thanks so much Emma for your ideas on combating the things that are pulling me down at the moment, I think for me right now i need a break from CD and i will go with Atkins until i feel strong enough to come back. I think i have driven my OH mad over the past week, in fact i'm driving myself mad. One things for sure i wont stop dieting i just need to find my way.

    size 12 wannabe - good luck with your start, i will say that this diet is great if you don't mess around, my only problem is that i have got myself in a cycle i cant get out of but stick to it and the results are fab!!
     
  12. kikuka

    kikuka Tequila makes miaow happy

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    Hi, just a quick note to say everything you are going thrugh happened to me. I eventually decided to stop CD and try WW, then decided on Atkins. I maintained more or less for 6 months, but was using the more flexible approach to cheat a bit and wasnt losing, so I have come back to CD. I started back on CD 1000 which was great, but strictly controlled. That helped me get back into it and I am not back on SS, why not try the 1000 plan? I sympathise though, this diet is so hard for so many reasons. Every night I have a bubble bath while OH eats his dinner. It does help, and I know it is only temporary. I have taught myself a lesson though, I can maintain, so I am less scared about reaching goal, and with CD it is sooner rather than later I hope!
     
  13. Laila

    Laila Losing is the ONLY option

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    Hun,

    You have done really well, you wrote that fab post about what you have achieved and you have achieved so much. We are human, we make mistakes and we have bad times so don't beat yourself up too much. I went awol last week as i was in that binge cycle and couldnt get out of it.

    I sat down and thought really carefully why I want this, I took some photos of myself and realised im not happy the way I am and the only I can change that. I can come on this forum all day but at the end if I dont want to do it, no one can make me. So the key is telling yourself you HAVE to do this.

    The binge cycle is a complete cow once your in it, but you can easily get out. Day 1 and 2 will be crap but just keep gritting your teeth and then you will be back on it.

    Everytime you get these weak moments its actually making you STRONGER to carry on long term. Can u imagine doing it 10/12 weeks no cheats then having a massive fall off the wagon, how heartbreaking must that be? So its better its happened now, you can get over it and carry on.

    Hun you are a truly fab person, i love readng your posts you really deserve to be happy. I hope you can find that inner fighter soon :) its hard i know but you will do it.

    Laila x
     
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  14. emmapetty

    emmapetty Going for Goal!

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    Laila - you are so lovely :) Big Hugs x x x
     
  15. Losing it for good

    Losing it for good Full Member

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    I came off the diet for 3 weeks and put on 6lb because all I ate was rubbish- sweets, chocolate, cakes, alcohol even though I'm not a massive fan of these things I just could not stop craving them and gave in to temptation big time. I was less than a stone away from goal and ruined it with a binge. Back on track again now but it is even harder when you have blipped so know exactly where you are coming from.

    I can't say what you should do but whatever it is make sure it is right for you! xx
     
  16. BubblyPenguin

    BubblyPenguin Recovering Foodaholic

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    Oh Hun,

    I am so sorry that you are feeling this way- you've been such an inspiration to rest of us in your posts and have certainly kept me going! I know you've had blips but each time you've got back and become stronger from it- and that takes real strength.

    You have felt success with CD, yes it is sooo hard, but what keeps me going is the thought of the time I will be doing SS in comparison to the rest of my life. I know that every day I do on SS will be multiplied enormously in terms of how much longer I will live. Because I am the one in control.

    You also know that YOU are the one in control of the choices you make, not the takeaway or the food or your family. Yes we have blips, we all make mistakes, but we LEARN from them. What are the triggers? When are the weak points? Can you be sure that by doing a different diet you won't suffer the same blips or have the same triggers?

    Laila is totally right- it is a teeth-gritting and getting to grips with what you truly want. It's about finding that inner strength that we know you have to achieve your goals. Have you thought about what achieving that goal will mean to you?

    When your family eat- do you have your shake then? I always try to make sure the OH and me eat at the same time, and I have a shake in the staffroom at work when others are eating- that way I'm not missing out on the much needed social aspects.

    This is not a diet, Hun, this is a change for life- that's never going to be easy, but we believe in YOU and we know you can do it xxx
     
  17. DappyMare

    DappyMare Girl on a mission

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    Sass, You have to go with what your heart says but look how happy you were when you lost a stone in 3 weeks.

    I have faffed around with so many diets this year...including cd and have ended up heavier than i was at xmas. i made the decision to end the cycle of diets, kicked myself up the bum and getting back on the cd wagon from tomorrow. Think about things long term...I came to the conclusion to do cd till I hit goal make my way up through the stages then do exercise to maintain. I don't want to live my life worring about points, carbs, sins etc and not getting any where with weekly losses of maybe 1/2 lb to 3 lbs. we all want to lose weight over night but think how long it takes to put it on:sigh:

    Just think as others have said to you, do you want to reach goal weight quicker and looking fab for xmas, or lose weight slowly where you could still be in the cycle of binging.

    Know where ya coming from hun as taking me weeks to sort me head out but we're all hear for ya hun if you need to chat:p
     
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  19. IMac

    IMac Gold Member

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    Ok I'll start by saying I agree with everything people say - I'm 50 years old, have 5 kids and need to live. I'm also rubbish at diets however......for me, and thats all I can speak for my weight loss is slow but its going.

    I SS apart from when I have an occasion, sounds daft but birthday's, special occasions, daughter's graduation etc all constitute occasions. Because i have a lot of weight to lose (9 -10 stone) and my family (and home life) are important my compromise is:

    1. that I always sit down to eat with the family in the evening except I have a shake or porridge and they have real food
    2. I've been very strict about not drinking alcohol (3 - 4 times this year)
    3. I won't "waste" the food I'm eating eg a take away is a waste as is nicking chips or eating leftovers but going out as a treat to celebrate something is worth eating for ! ie no picking !!
    4. Understand the way this diet works eg once in ketosis you will fat burn rapidly and have a great weight loss but once you eat the glycogen levels fill up and instant gain of 5 - 7 pounds. If you are aware of this then it makes its easier to cope with SSing.
    5. Plan when you are going to eat and once its over get straight back on the diet.
    6. Be totally honest with yourself and your CDC

    This is definitely not the quickest or most efficient way, but for me it works. Because I don't feel that I'm missing out or causing difficulties at home it becomes do-able. I've tried every other diet in the world and this is the only one I have stuck to for a long term.

    I've lost almost 6 stone but its taken a year but it has gone, my waist is now 12 -13 inches less than it was and I feel (and look) tons better so don't panic but give it a go...eat with the family (but not what they are eating) and above all enjoy the feeling of knowing you are in control.

    with love and best wishes xx
     
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  20. Sass

    Sass Silver Member

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    I want to say a huge thankyou to everyone who has taken the time to read my post and then reply with all your lovely advice. xxx

    Your all so lovely and i know deep down that everything your all saying is right. I have however chosen to go with atkins for now just to see how i go but i think i will be back as i do indeed love the fast loses. It almost feels like i need to do this to get it out my system before i can come back with my head in the right place, don't know if that makes any sense to anyone but its the only way i can explain it right now.

    Thankyou all so much xxx
     
  21. Losing it for good

    Losing it for good Full Member

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    That's exactly what I did sass and I feel in a better state of mind for it! I'm sure you'll be fine whatever you do.

    Let us know how you get on with the Atkins xx
     
  22. ThisTimeIsForReal

    ThisTimeIsForReal Member

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    This is my first post here on minimins and I could have written the OP! It is the story of my dieting life the last couple of years. I lost 6 stone a few years ago with ww and put it on again over my pregnancies. In between pregnancies and since my last baby was born 12 mths ago, I have mucked around with ww, cd, lipotrim and celeb slim. I have managed to get into the zone for a couple of weeks and then fall off the wagon. Because I'm always starting again 'tomorrow', I eat all the goodies 'today' and 'tonight' so I can be good 'tomorrow' and start the rest of my life!

    But when 'tomorrow' comes, there's always another really great reason for 'tomorrow' to be deferred once again. And so the cycle continues!

    Best of luck with your decision. I hope to post progress here soon!
     
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