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I'm struggling a bit tonight

#1
:giveup:I've had some (more) bad news today about my Niece, who,sadly,is terminally ill.
My first response after coming off the phone to my Sister, was to open the cupboards and fridge, looking for something to eat :eek:
I'm not going to, because I really want to succeed on this and I know that eating won't alter the situation one bit, but it's so hard when that's the way I've always coped with things. I'm struggling to find an alternative to it, to be honest with you all.
I bet if Nick was here with me, she'd tell me off herself for turning to food, so I'm focussing on that as much as I can.
It's a bit harder for me, coz I'm a Macmillan Nurse, and not only have inside knowledge of her condition, but talk to people in a similar situation all day and feel sometimes I've used up all my reserves of strength.
I'm trying to give support to my Sister and family (all down in Cornwall) so it's all a terrible strain.
Sorry for being on such a downer, but my OH is working till midnight and just needed to do a post to keep me out of the fridge etc. :wave_cry:
 
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#2
cathy, im really sorry to hear about your news, but at least she has someone to help her get though the time with someone who knows so much about it and someone she can relate to too! im sure you can stick to it! i bet if you spoke to her about it, she'd beg u not to quit!

well done on doing so well so far! x keep your chin up
 

YumyMumy

Crawling to the finish!
#3
Im really sorry to hear about your niece. This is a perfect opertunity to figt your demons that tell you to comfort eat. when you wake up in the morning you will have won a battle with your conscience and feel great. If you hang in there (i know i probably wouldnt) you are truely wonderful xx
 

pizzle84

I will do this!!!
#4
Really sorry to hear about your neice. Why dont you go out for a nice walk, or get your favourite book and have a soak in the bath? Just dont give in because you'll just feel even worse!
 
#6
Hey Cathy

Sorry to hear your news but great on trying to resist temptation. Why dont you spend some time trying to find something cool to give your neice to help cheer her up a bit on the web. A craft set or a cuddly toy or something I know its not going to work miracles but itll be a good distraction for you now and if its something for her to make or read or just talk to when she is scared itll be a good distraction for her when she gets it. Find the coolest bestest thing you can think of doesnt matter if it only costs 50p im sure it will make her smile:) for a while

Were here hon and all you have to do is shout and someone will come running. :)
 
#8
oh babe, lots of love and good vibes for you family xxx
 
#9
Gosh Cathy, that is sooo rough! Hugs babe! All I can say is fellow comfort eater here. So......if you eat .....will it help you? your niece? your sister? Will it change anything? Will it REALLY comfort you at this time? Who wins if you eat? No one wins but YOU definitely lose if you eat. Don't eat.....do it for yourself.....the strength and power that you will feel tomorrow NOT having eaten will carry you forward and give you strength for your niece and sister.

But all that aside babes....you rant away.....thinking of you and your family.....hang in there.

XXXXXX
 
#10
I so sorry cathy to hear what your going through, i cant imagine how you must be feeling. I think you know as you said yourself that food isn't going to make you feel any better, if anything it will certainly make you feel worse. I think everyone has had some good suggestions for you, just keep posting on here & chatting and hopefully that will help curb your cravings. Hugs to you hun xxx
 
#11
Hi Hun really sorry you are having such an awful time. As you are having to be strong for your family then its up to us to be strong for you, so post anytime and there will always be someone about.

Well done on resisting the comfort eating, it is a very strong, almost instinctive reaction when things are really bad and you should be very proud of yourself for posting here instead of eating x
 
#13
so sorry to hear about your neice you done well not to take anything from that fridge or cupboard you showed strength there so keep it up im sure you can
 

liberty_girl

Peace Love Happiness
#14
Cathy
I'm very sorry about your niece and it sounds really tough, I can identify with comfort eating and it's times like these that make it difficult.

I hate giving advice (I saw a badge once that said 'Take my advice I'm not using it') but, what I will say is be kind to yourself.

This might sound a bit mad but I have a large-ish teddy that I hug when I am lonely (my OH works away all week), something nurturing.

I think somewhere along the way, or maybe from birth I got the idea that food was nurturing when infact it's harming me to eat when I don't need it.
hugs
 
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#15
I am so sorry to hear your news hun it must be so so hard for you.
As for teh food it will only make you feel worse in the long run but I can totally empathise with you & today I really wanted a cig (havent smoked for 4yrs) because I know I cant eat so I was wanting to turn to something.
Try going on the arcade I have just found it & it keeps me so occupied :)
Hope ya make it through til oh comes home hun
Good luck
Niki
x
 
#16
cathy please hun do NOT say sorry for coming on here and talking to use we are all friends here and all surport eachother. i am very very sorry to hear about your neice and know why you wanted to turn to the fridge and be bloody proud of yourself for not turning to food and knowing that it is not going to change anything. i am not sure what else to say apart from i am sorry hun and we are all here for you xxxxx
 
#17
Oh Cathy hunny, I am so sorry to hear about your niece. It is hard when someone close to you is going through hell when physically you are so far away. My own sister went through chemo last year and I felt powerless to help her until a friend suggested I find little gifts I could post to her each week. It really kept me occupied trying to find different things I could post without it costing me an arm and a leg. I know she really appreciated the thought and the gifts. Maybe you could do something similar for your niece. I don't know how old she is but if she is a teenager then things like face masks, bubble baths, manicure or pedicure sets, small soft toys, magazines, puzzle books (my sister loves suduko), sweets, etc. Whenever you feel down, think about what you could send her next to cheer her up/distract her.

I think you are a wonderful person to do the job you do. I have lost a couple of friends to cancer in the last couple of years and I know it was nurses like you that made their last days so much easier for them and their families.

Take care sweetie, we are here whenever you need us.

x
 
#18
I'm terribly sorry about your niece, your whole family must be in agony.
You are doing so well not dulling your feelings with food. A situation as bad as this would make most people forget about their resolve. If you turn to food you will end up broken hearted and grieving but also depressed and angry with yourself . That is not going to help a bad situation. What comfort is there? Nothing food can give. As everyone else said, you will have enough to cope with without making yourself fat and uncomfortable too.
(Macmillan nurses make such a difference, you're amazing people - thank you for helping my friends too.)
 


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