Issues...

[SingerJess]

I have had alot of difficulties growing up (with parents, etc..) and I have always turned to food as a comfort... I used to eat bar after bar of chocolate (and I'm not talking about little bars either....) And bag after bag of crisps and sweets (these were often family/share sized....)

I realise that in order to overcome this problem of overeating I must tackle this obsession with food as a comfort.

I am just wondering if there are others on this site who have done/ or do the same thing. And if you have any guidance about how to resolve it. I thought about sticking a motto/photo in purse for when I try and buy them. Have also heard it helps to have distractions.. but I'm not sure.

Do you have anything that could help me? Without tackling this problem there is no way I can lose weight as I just keep bingeing. Sorry this isn't a very happy post but I'm not sure where else to put it. And I need help with this.

 

[interested92]

I found CBT helped. cognitive behavioural therapy. it's free on the nhs and honestly, it was a godsend for me. *hugs*

 

[SingerJess]

Thanks. So do you think this is something I need professional help with, rather than tackling it on my own..? I don't like my doctor :-/ She always makes me feel like I'm wasting her time! I don't think I could go and talk about this to her.

 

[interested92]

request a different doctor. and you're allowed to do this. yes, it is something you will need help with. I struggled for years on my own and never got anywhere.

also I found knitting and crochet helped too. it's kind of a distraction more than anything.

 

[SingerJess]

Ok thanks. I will do that.

 

[Maddysmum]

Have you tried writing down how you feel about past situations, parents etc - what you REALLY feel & you don't have to post the letters so you can say ANYTHING.
Talking from experience (i've been through some really awful things in my past) which resulted in me feeling i was a freak and unloveable and as a consequence severe eating disorders. It was only when i talked these things through (both verbally & written) that my true feelings came out & i could then find ways to cope with them.
I finally feel like i'm coming through the other side and in control (& abeit slowly making a success of SW)
You deserve to be happy & deal with this and then Yes you will make a success of getting to whatever size or weight you want to be.

good Luck on your journey x

 

[ejgemmag]

I went through therapy a few years ago, huge help with my eating habits but i slowly slipped back into those habits again, I have new distractions now which really keep me off thinking of food, a lot of mine was using food to deal with my feelings. Since i've started back doing SW I've actually got back into the tools that the therapist gave me and Im dealing with my feeling sthorugh exercising and planning healthy meals.

My little mantra now is : This is MY journey for ME and I want to be around to see how my journey progresses.

Good luck on your journey you will have tonnes of support here x Em x

 

[SingerJess]

Your support means so much. I've never put me first before, and I've never took the time for myself just to try and make things better. I think now is as good a time as any to start believing that I'm worth spending the time on.

It's got to the point when I'll go out in clothes that don't match properly, no make up, unwashed hair up in a bun and trainers. And that's a normal day! I used to be so full of confidence. I want that girl back

 

[JezVonSavage]

also I found knitting and crochet helped too. it's kind of a distraction more than anything.

Knitting is a witches craft!! Do you expect me to believe that 2 sticks and a bit of wool will make a jumper?? I don't think so

Singer jess, there isn't much I can offer here but I just wanted to say that the majority of people on this forum are here because we have the same issues. Don't be ashamed of anything you have to say- you'd be shocked at how many people are in the same boat.

I am lucky- I have masses of confidence but now and then I start to flail and like you don't want to do my hair or put my face on (I know that this is when I'm critical and have to do something urgently) so I made a promise to myself that I never need an excuse to get my hair or my nails done. There will never be an occasion when I feel "overdressed", as long as I feel great that is all that matters. Money is not an issue- if I can't afford a spa day I can still afford a hair mask, a bath and a new lippy

Set yourself a little confidence target- tell yourself that next week you wont do the super market shop without your slap on or you will find money in your budget for a new nail polish and you WILL wear it to work. Little things like that work wonders and you'll be amazed how many people will comment and then you'll feel great

If you need any help just ask, I am a makeup artist and I work with confidence issues every day I am no doctor but I see the difference when a woman walks out of my studio with her head held high!

 

[SingerJess]

You are so right! About the knitting thing firstly, lol! I am never gonna be a granny who knits cardys!

I used to wear make up everyday when I was at sixth form. Nails were always polished. Always had nice clothes on. And I felt confident.

Since I've started going out with my boyf I have lost that. It sounds stupid but I just don't make the effort, and I should.

I think it's a case of I don't think I'm worth it. So I am starting setting myself a task for everyday which proves that I am worth it. Today I wrote down 10 things I liked about myself (by number 8 was scraping the barrel mind...."I can cook"...) but it did make me feel good.

 

[JezVonSavage]

Cooking is an important life factor!! If you met by best friend you'd realise that you are lucky to be able to cook (she ruins mushy peas, which is a skill in itself really).

Chin up Jess. There are plenty of mini tasks you can set for yourself. If money isn't an issue why not just pick a "treat" up for yourself every week? Makeup or new clothes, or a spray tan. I guarantee you'll feel better after a spray tan. I'm not really a spray tan kind of girl but I always feel a bit more glam after one so I came around to them

 

[bevhunter1986]

I'm not very good at offering advice and I'm always one that needs it.

But I wanted to post to say Jez is right!! We all have confidence as in weight issues and some of us many other issues and that's why we are here. Like me i have insomnia too, which other things just add to your comfort eating etc. no matter what you need someone on minimins can always point you in the right direction, that is a promise!

As I'm not much help I'll send you lots of hugs instead!!!

*hugs*
Xxx

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

 

[interested92]

Knitting is a witches craft!! Do you expect me to believe that 2 sticks and a bit of wool will make a jumper?? I don't think so

it's not witchcraft. it's a series of increasingly complicated knots hahaha.

and a slightly easier series of complicated knots (imho) is crochet... you can make nutty stuff like this and then present them to random members of the family.

yes. that's an anatomically correct heart. complete with cholesterol furring and minor blood vessels.

 

[who_la_hoop]

A book that might help, if you don't fancy going to the doctors, is Overcoming Binge Eating by Christopher Fairburn - it's one that the NHS recommend. It has a step-by-step programme to help you address what makes you binge and so help yourself get better. I would recommend it. x

 

[JezVonSavage]

yes. that's an anatomically correct heart. complete with cholesterol furring and minor blood vessels.

And this is evidence that knitting is NOT a witches craft!???!

I jest Flibs, I'm just jealous that I can't knit.

 

[SingerJess]

I think you're right. Currently money IS an issue, especially as fresh fruit and veg costs so much more than frozen potato letters and chicken nuggets.....

But I think I'll try and do something for myself everyday. Like paint my nails, have a nice bath, straighten my hair, etc.

 

[interested92]

money is an issue for us too, but for books I look on amazon. they often have second hand books... but do check the postage rates because sometimes the second hand turns out more expensive than the full, brand new price lol.

 

[SingerJess]

Ah ok. Thanks I love having a bubbly bath with a face mask, a good book/magazine, some music, and a lovely cup of green tea! Think tonight I'll get everything ready for work tomorrow, and then go up for a bath just before bed for half an hour or so. Will be nice and relaxing.