I've had a wake up call somewhat yesterday...! Both positive and negative. I guess I'll start with the good. Been on Lighter Life for so long now... and I can honestly thank it for so many positives. For the first time in my life I can actually SEE that I am slim. I can finally say I make my own choices. I did get that self-image phase for a while where I saw myself as fat even though I was a size 12. It's strange. But somewhere along the line, just in the last two weeks I can honestly say, that I like me . I may not be beautiful, but I accept and embrace what I look like. I have had to come to terms with a lot of things and I feel like I've suddenly grown up. I'm turning 23 next week and suddenly I know where I need to go. I have been through clinical depression, have self-harmed for many years and always need to cover up my body because of this. I have for so many years also clung onto the 'injustices' that have been shoved my way. I have been obese all my life, and often been ridiculed because of it. But there is an upside. LighterLife gave me the tools (not just the counselling) but also teaching me the strength to be patient. Things will come in good time.... as they say: "Good things come to those who wait." and that is so very true. I can say I am happy now. So much of my life I spent looking to blame something else, someone else for my troubles; but I know now I need to take responsibility for my own actions. We all have a choice of which path we take, we need to remember that we are in charge of our own destiny. No one else will do anything FOR us. We are in complete control of what we say and do, after all, no one is holding a gun to our heads forcing us to eat a cookie. We do it to ourselves. The negative side, is the addictive nature of weight-loss and the fear of re-gain. Furthermore, not just that. I actually fit in a size 10 now which is fairly amazing! I didn't think I'd get this far, it wasn't in my original plan. At this point of Lighter Life Lite I am suffering from lethargy. I have hours of my brain just failing, every movement, every thought, every task takes so much effort. *THINKING* is an effort. Lol, that sounds stupid, but for the last 2 months it's felt like I've been running on vapours. I just don't have the energy to even have a normal conversation with my boyfriend. And yesterday he finally said it to me: "You're not a nice person to be around." Now before you all bounce off the handle at him: He is right. I reached my target of 10stone, and have done 2 extra weeks. Because of the obsessive nature of weight-loss I was determined to keep going even though I'm finding it more and more difficult to stay awake, to even be NICE to someone. How absurd that sounds? I promised him I'd start RTM this week and somewhere I almost decided I wasn't going to. I forgot how much this type of living affects the people around me. I am happy with what I have now why keep pushing at the expense of my relationships and health? I guess I was curious as to what's on the other side of Obesity. The extreme opposite - the bones and the dips and that 'frail' feeling. But ... Curiousity killed the cat... I choose to stop before it's too late.