Jezebella's Journal

mmmmm food choices sound delish jez :)
 
Sounds like a busy day!! It's great to look at a beautifullly loaded fruit bowl, isn't it!! I had a lucky day myself, and scored some globe artichokes, which I have been looking for, for, oh, I don;t know - about 8 years!! LOL Happy days!

ABout the packs - I began to find it difficult too, the further I went in to RTM. I would be full enough form the small meals - and I began ti miss them out now and again. I started trying to have them first, in the day, and then meals later. Just to be sure to get thr nutritional value in, and then ate less. But it was difficult becuase it so lovely to have real, fresh food again - they always seemed to find the backseat!! LOL

Well, have a good day, and enjoy all your efforts! I am not sure what I am going to do myself today, but cooking at some point will be part of it. I am sensing a crock pot full of Scotch Broth simmering away while it blows and rains outside, and tonight - dinner will be soup and an artichoke!!! <doing my happy dance? :D :D

x
 
Wow Jez

Sounds like you and Sis Bliss had a busy day. I'm also thrilled with fresh fruit and veg and enjoying much more variety nowadays than I ever did.
I enjoyed my day too.
I shared asparagus with my hubby for supper last night. He had baked potato with ham and salad as well. I had smoked salmon and a dressing made with lemon, smoked paprika and the ubiquitous yummy yogurt and a chopped up beef tomato with red onion with mine - stuffed and legal.
Enjoy the day with your family today and happy cooking. So glad Miss Lilly is making good progress xx
 
Aww, Jezzy, you're doing really well! I'm glad that you seem to have overcome the 'control' demons that were plagueing you a couple of weeks ago, you have really put your 'adult' ego state into play. :)

Remember though, there aren't any "should's" in eating! Do as you feel is appropriate, never follow the voices in your head telling you what you should or shouldn't do... there is no formula we 'need' to follow... the responsibility comes from our own decision making and our personal needs... and I must say, you have really come through wonderfully within this RTM journey. Throughout the process you have on the whole actually been extremely logical and relaxed about it all...
You - are - an - inspiration! :hug99:

xx
 
She is indeed an inspiration :)

Kat xx


Aww, Jezzy, you're doing really well! I'm glad that you seem to have overcome the 'control' demons that were plagueing you a couple of weeks ago, you have really put your 'adult' ego state into play. :)

Remember though, there aren't any "should's" in eating! Do as you feel is appropriate, never follow the voices in your head telling you what you should or shouldn't do... there is no formula we 'need' to follow... the responsibility comes from our own decision making and our personal needs... and I must say, you have really come through wonderfully within this RTM journey. Throughout the process you have on the whole actually been extremely logical and relaxed about it all...
You - are - an - inspiration! :hug99:

xx
 
RTM Day 63 (Week 9)

Wow, can't believe how fast this is going. Seems like just the other day I started RTM now I am about to start Week 10. The weeks go so fast it seems you just start with a new food list and then you are on to the next one. Tomorrow brings cheese back into my life, which has always been a great love of mine and possibly a trigger. It will be interesting to see how my body reacts. It is only 25g a day though which really isn't much. Have got some half fat mozzarella in for tomorrow to have with the heirloom tomatoes and fresh basil. Will also bring home some hereford hop and a bit of cropwell bishop stilton and some brie for later in the week. Since you can't have crackers with the cheese, I am planning a little cheese plate like we do them at work but minus the crackers, so celery, grapes, a bit of apple and dried fruit and nuts with it. A lovely savoury dessert!

Today was interesting. I have played with my boundaries a bit. Made the pancakes this morning with some buttermilk and fresh raspberries - really delish when topped with vanilla berry compote, a few raisins, sprinkle of flaked almonds anda dollop of fat free yeo valley vanilla. It was gorgeous to eat, and felt very restauranty. It filled me up, but no way near as much as the porridge, and remarkably flour is massively high in calories. It is something I will try again after RTM is done however.

The house was all spick and span, and my cousins finally arrived, so lovely to see them and we had such a good time catching up. We have not spent much time with them since we were much younger and it is amazing to all be adults now, and yet we are all still so much the same. So lots of reminiscing and a good old catch up. I had a half a glass of prosecco with everyone else and I actually did really enjoy it. Stopped at that though. It would have been quite easy to have another glass but calorifically not good. Lunch was great, but a bit of a headf**k. I pre prepared everything, and it was a meal I had made for us last week - the pork and apple casserole with brown rice and some savoy cabbage. Now I know it was all fat free and really good, I also know what a portion should be from my previous meal of this. However, I just popped everything onto the table and we all dished up for ourselves. I think my portion ended up being just fine, but there is this nagging worry, omg I did not weigh this, what if I had 60g not 50g?? So as much as it felt great and normal, it also felt quite odd and scary. Makes me worry for having to eat food I have not cooked, either at someones house or at a restaurant. Hopefully I will have some time to get my head around this all. Might have to plan a meal out at a restaurant to test it. We served pudding with lunch as it was a proper sort of party meal. The ever glorious grilled bananas and Sista Bliss and I had them with a bit of fat free creme fraiche , some raisins and 1 crumbled pecan nut, but offered it to the others with chocolate brownie and double cream. One of my cousins has been anorexic and it was interesting to watch how much she ate and how relaxed she now seemed about food. Worryingly she said she still goes for days without eating. So it would seem the theory holds true, that being busy and stressed does have an affecton eating for some of us. I also had in my house for the first time, bread and butter - nice crusty baguettes too. I put that out for them which they both ate, I didn't miss it, but it would have been nice to try, so bring on bread week - well minus the butter.

I had already decided earlier that dinner would be light, so made some nice asparagus and ham frittata with a few mushies, peppers, spinach and onions thrown in there too. Had that with a nice salad and a bit of fresh tomato sauce - really good. Having a jelly now, and a yoghurt, and really really should fit a pack in, but worried it will take my calories too high for today. Having said that they have been low for the last 2 days so perhaps it is ok and it balances.

I am starting to feel a bit apprehensive about the end of RTM, will I cope???? Realistically I know I will but a part of me is petrified, what if I overdo it, what if I go on a bender???? But then I suppose I had these fears before RTM too. I do like the control aspects of logging the food, but know this must come to an end at some point too, as it can become too obsessive and cause issues later on. So will probably log for the first few weeks then try and cut it down. My contrary nature wants for me to have the control but naturally, without having to think, to just be able to eat naturally. I suppose if I get it right 6 days out of 7 that will be ok, as RTM is all about doing enough, not about being perfect.

I am eating my jelly really slowly, because part of me tonight just wants to devour it even though I am not physically hungry. A bit of restraint is a good thing. I wonder if the flour today has made me feel hungrier???

So a bit of confusion going on tonight, and the possibility of higher calories than the last few days. Arrrrrrgh!!!

Well tomorrow brings new challenges, wishing you all a wonderful week and thanks for the fantastic comments!

Jez
xx
 
hi jez a quick question is it possible to tell me how to make chicken casserole please :)
 
thank you very much :)
 
RTM Day 64 (Week 10)

OMG Week 10 is here, so really only 3 full weeks of rtm left, well minus one day! Today was a good day food wise, felt much better because I had a bit more control. Felt quite hungry this morning and last night I felt snacky in the extreme, the first time I have wanted to eat, just because. I had my bar with a cup of tea late night, so that did the trick. I could have gone and eaten c**p but The bar was what I really wanted. It soooo hit the spot. but back to today. Diabolical traffic, London in the rain is just pants!! Got in swallowed a few black coffees and got on with work until I felt it was appropriately breakfast time at about 9:30. Skipping the porridge etc, as it was a one week only thing!! Arrgh, kinda miss it already, but made up for it with a wintery version of sunshine breakfast to cheer me up on such a miserable, rainy day. So Mandarin Muller Light, with banana, and a sprinkle of raisins, mixed in with some warmed apple and blackberry. Oh how lovely it is - I forgot just how good sunshine breakfast can be. Slaved away all day today, and actually managed to get a whole lot of great things done work wise and even better, managed to get some soups and things batched up for me to eat at work during the week. But more about those later. Lunch at about 2:30 pm of a fab green salad - lettuce, cherry tomato, cucumber, pepper, red onion and a little mushroom with raspberry vinaigrette and some wafer thin sliced chicken. Followed that up with a jelly at 4pm just before I left work. Good thing I did, because the traffic was even worse due to some road works on one of the roads. 2 and a half hours later, dying for a wee, I made it home!! I was starving in the car and for once did not have a bar or piece of fruit with me. Grabbed a mini apple as soon as I got through the door and started dinner prep. I had a little plan fermenting in my head all day after looking at Kat's Yeo Valley page, so one of the tings I made today was a fab Tandoori Marinade - lol sorry Kat, had to make my own recipe up, have never been too good at following recipes. I decided this would go really well with a curried lentil type dish. So popped the salmon in the marinade for 2 hours and made my lentils of lovliness. Have been dying for lentils for some time and never really got to experiement with them in week 7 so decided now was the time. "Sauteed" some onions, garlic, ginger, chilli and curry powder with a bit of ground cumin, and coriander, added in some brunoise sweet potato and diced aubregine. Stirred in a tin of chopped tomatoes and added some puy lentils. Topped up with water and a bit of veggie stock and cooked, until reduced and lentils were tender, added some shredded savoy last minute dot com and cooked until soft. Baked the salmon in a very hot oven 240c which sealed it nicely but kept it brilliantly moist. Had this on top of the lentils with some fresh corriander, a bit of fat free raita and a tomato and corriader sambal (kind of like an indian verison of salsa) It was sublime, so wintery and good yet healthy too!! The lentils rocked my world. Pud was some fresh raspberries a few flaked almonds and a strawberry yoghurt with some strawberry jelly.

Now is the high point of the evening- We are onto the cheese course. Have a little 25g portion of Hereford hop with a few grapes and dried apricots. Have had the teeniest little nibble and oooh yum yum yum, but it is really fatty to the taste. It looks a remarkably small portion, something I previously could have eaten in a bite or 2, but it should be more than satisfactory. Have some Cashel Blue to try tomorrow and brie for later in the week. Also have some low fat Mozzarella to have with my beautiful heirloom tomatoes. That with a bit of ripped fresh basil, balsamic and a little red onion will be lush!!!

On the rest of the cooking front, whilst the lentils were cooking for dinner I made another batch of French Lentil Ragout to have with Lamb later in the week. Soups that I made today, were: Fennel, Celeriac and Apple; Mixed Root Veg and Orange; Winter Brown Lentil Soup and a Lightly Spiced Red Lentil soup. They all totally rock, had a small taste of each. So have them loaded up at work for me during the week. Tomorrow plan a few more bits of compote cooking and a batch of Ratatouille.

I am finding it so enjoyable to batch cook things, so it is all ready in the freezer/fridge for the week ahead - how did I ever waste my money on Ready Meals?? I have this week's meals, pretty much boxed off and ready to go.

Class tomorrow, so will be interesting to see what the scales have to say. I think I have managed to maintain about the same weight.

Lily is doing wonderfully well, but is still rather clingy, perhaps both Bliss and I being at work tomorrow will help her to setle more into a routine??

Have a fantastic Tuesday everyone.

Jez
xx
 
Hi Jez

I am batch cooking for the kids now. I love it. As you say, why did I ever select to use ready meals. Definitely a habit I have chucked away.

I have started collecting your recipes by the week so i can remind myself of all the fab options. What a legacy you are writing. It will be of use for many in the years to come.

Off-line again until Friday so will catch up again then. xx
 
Babe cant wait for a proper catch up with ya, it has been too long!!! Send us a pic you skinny thing, and can you also give yourself a big pat on the back from me - you are a star!!!!

Big hugs hun and when is the big day for your RTM start?

Jez
xx
 
Sounds lovely jez :) can't beat the mandarin yogurt so lovely
 
Hiya Jez. Have you ever cooked with Tofu skin / paper? I thought that if anyone on here knows what to do with it, then you are that person! ;-)
 
Jezzy, don't freak out too much about not having control when other people are cooking... that's the one fear/freak out that I had to let go of this week... and I've come to terms with it in knowing that I have the control in HOW MUCH of food I have. Remember - the portion control is always down to you, and not knowing 'exact' measurements isn't the end of the world at all. 10g is nothing compared to how much 'extra' we used to pile on (which was probably more like 200g extra!).
And yes - you are absolutely right, the weight thing - it balances out. We don't store 'fat' on a daily basis. It's a much slower process than that, more weekly/monthly than anything. ;)

As for Tofu Wooster... the person to ask about it is BL! She's come up with lots of weird and wonderful ways to use it in a whole variety of dishes. Prod her and I'm sure she will indulge you with a few secrets. :)
 
Babe cant wait for a proper catch up with ya, it has been too long!!! Send us a pic you skinny thing, and can you also give yourself a big pat on the back from me - you are a star!!!!

Big hugs hun and when is the big day for your RTM start?

Jez
xx

Hiya Hon, thanks for your lovely comments. I'm in Manchester for the week but managed to log on OK tonight!

I would love to try and hook up with you somewhere soon, but can't make the London meet. You are a bit of an idol for me at the moment :flirt2:.

RTM is due to start after my first meeting on Tues 24th Nov (missing my last developers meeting this week :cry:). However, I may start RTM this coming weekend when I get home as I am craving the bars and feel a bit out of control. I was diving last weekend and purposefully had six packs a day for the diving days as I needed the extra calories big time - the diving is energy intensive and I was so cold when I last dived it took hours and hours for me to stop shaking. However, I then had six packs yesterday including 3 :eek: bars - I have an intense desire to chew.

OK today though - will manage to stick to four and, as I am in a full-on training course for the next two days, I should stabilise again and hope to regain control and 100% adherence. I really, really want to get to my goal weight, but desperate to be in week 5 for Christmas so I can have a Christmas Dinner and join in the majority of the meals with only minor adjustment, plus have a glass of wine or a g&t along with the guests.

Looking forward to RTM and Christmas lots. You'll be finished by then - wow! Your story has been compelling and has assisted my preparation loads. xx
 
gosh t_i you are sooooo close
i'm getting all excited about you starting RTM!!!!
daisy x
 
RTM Day 65 (Week 10)

Another day gone, more cheese was had! Pretty good day food wise, Breakfast at about 10:30 which was another sunshine breakfast, exactly the same as yesterday, lol obviously I enjoyed it enough to want to double up. Made a few new compotes so have those in the fridge for later in the week. Busy, busy day, turned out the dry store, and the walkin freezers, so lots of heavy lifting and omg it was cold!!! At least it burn off a fair few calories! Lunch was late, but a scrummy salad of prawns with sweet chili and yoghurt dressing, rocket, tomato, cucumber, red onion and peppers. I really should have heated up the soup, but didn't have the time. Aarrgh why are there not 26 hours in the day, again it will be bloody midnight before I get to bed. I am so sick and tired of having to come home and do work for work at home on my home pc, because they are too bloody credit crunchy cheap to replace my compute that was stolen, I mean jesus wept, how do you work without a computer these days??? Especially when you are supposed to be completing online reports daily???? Sorry guys, rant over, I just feel I have not stopped since I got up at 5:30 this morning.

Raced home to try and get more work done, but yet again traffic was murder, managed to get 40 minutes in before class.

Class was actually lovely, lots of people missing but interesting all the same. Sometimes you get more out of a small class. I have lost another half a kg, so am technically at my lowest weight yet, so LLC says I need to have more food!! Somehow I will try. I feel I am eating quite a bit at the moment. But my BMI is now just under 20 so getting a bit on the low side. Listening to those in group though, gave me a bit of a lightbulb. It made me realise how far I have come. Most of those in group tonight were in the first few weeks of RTM, so I was the oldie of the group. But I realise that I have conquered a lot of demons and work a lot more in the adult state than I thought I did. I felt quite proud talking about my achievements of the last weeks, and how I did not turn to food even when the going was tough. Even LLC seems to reckon I have conquered a fair few things. I guess it is a wait and see how it all pans out in the real world. I will however, carry on going to class weekly, as it gives me a break and some headspace that is just mine. Also it helps to keep us on track I think.

Thanks for all the positive messages lovelies, I will plan a meal out to test myself, it is something I need to work on, obviously.

Dinner tonight was chicken breast stuffed with a bit of Cashel Blue and wrapped in BGTY Lean bacon, on celeriac mash, with spinach, mange tout and asparagus with some root veg. Really gorgeous, and easier to digest than eating the cheese straight up. Had a chat with LLC re having porridge in this week as it did not trigger anything for me last week, so he said go ahead and experiment. I will probably try some again tomorrow morning or the morning after. So will see how it goes. I think he would be happy for me just to put some weight on. Who would have ever thought?

TI I really think you should start RTM as it sounds like you are ready for it, and a few days here or there will not matter. I have lost about a stone on RTM. Not that I am saying everyone looses but more than likely you will. Hope to catch up soon, we must organise something, perhaps for January when all goes quiet for me? Hopefully Morticia can join us??

Have also decided to go to ikea on the weekend to get a soft matress protectory thing for the bed. It is hard enough on my boney ass to sit for long periods, but when I started getting really uncomfy lying down in my favourite place - lol the bed ! - I decided it was time to do something about it. Must go and do a small investigation.

More tomorrow, but late again, as I have an event on and work to complete when I get in from the event. Arrghh it never ends!

Jez
xx
 
Wooster, btw re the tofu paper, have never worked with it, but think it might be similar to the vietnamese rice wrappers. Found this pic though which looks fab!! Will ask the other chefs tomorrow to see if they have any ideas and let you know.

Tofu paper wrapped green onions on Flickr - Photo Sharing!

Also found this which would be great when you get to rice week and can use the rice paper wrappers:

Vegan Epicurean: Crispy Rice Paper Wrapped Lemon Baked Tofu with Salsa and Baby Spinach

Jez
xx
 
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