Just keep sabotaging myself

[goingtobeskinnysoon]

Help guys - I need either advice or a bit of straight talking pls! Been doing SW since just before Xmas and had a good loss of 1.6 stone but for the past 3 weeks my head just hasn't been in it. Yes me and oh are having problems, yes work is insane, yes there are a million excuses I could roll out but I don't do excuses. I'm not sticking to it and that's why my losses have stopped.

I just can't seem to want it as bad. It's stupid, I've got holiday booked that is my target date, I know SW works, I've figured out great stuff to eat and I'm still doing 4-5 gym sessions. But I just keep sabotaging myself. Take yesterday, I was perfect all day as I saved my syns for chorizo I planned at dinner. So that was 11. Then I went oh I'll have some choc another 5. Then some more. And some more. You get the idea. Then today I was at a work conf. I ate before I left as I know it's always tricky but it got to 12 and there was nothing apart from mini ice cream pots. And I mean NOTHING! so I checked them out - 10 syns. Ok fine it's not how I want to use them but I feel sick with hunger right now. But then it came to lunch and I add 2 slices of cake to my boiled potatoes and veg. Why?!?! Why did I do that?! Idiot.

So this is getting long now but I really could do with some words of wisdom - I do not want to give up but I cannot get my head into it. Has anyone been here and got back in it? Ideas for giving myself a kick ?? Averaging about 25 syns a day and my body is slow enough at losses anyway...

 

[peggypig]

Didnt want to read and run Im sure someone will come along and give you a kick up the rear. I just wanted to say I hope things get sorted for you soon.

 

[Hamish's Mum]

can't help you, but I can sympathise. Since Xmas I have just been messing about and had a big gain last week. Have been so strict this week, but still feel it may not be enough.

Looking forward to any advice you get

 

[evilpenguin]

Hey

Sounds like your life is pretty stressful just now hun no wonder you are finding it hard.

I dunno what to say really - because usually when someone is going off plan they don't really know why or maybe they just don't want to admit that they're stressed or whatever, but it sounds like you know why you're not sticking it (as you have said you just don't want it as bad anymore?) How come you don't want to lose weight anymore?

I could list a million reasons as to why you should want to lose weight, but you clearly know why you wanted to lose weight in the first place as you've done so well so far! Perhaps you are scared of being thinner? I know that for me, every stone is a hurdle and I can feel myself wanting to self sabotage when it gets close - like I am terrified of being slim

Maybe you need to pretend you're a newbie? Read over your books, plan every meal in advance for the next week, look up new recipes you've never tried, do something different - have a Green day or something? Maybe you are bored of the plan and need something new to get your head back in the game - like a new exercise DVD or SW recipe book???

You could continue to sabotage yourself and have that 1.6 stone back on in no time, or get back on it and get to target for your holiday. That's the reality of it.

I hope you get yourself back on track. Do you have a food diary on here? Perhaps showing the world what you eat will get you back on the straight and narrow!

xxx

 

[MadameLaMinx]

I dont think the reasons that you cite for falling off plan are "excuses". I think they are reasons why your self-image is wobbling and as a result you dont feel like you are WORTH the effort. The thing is, You are. And having one area of your life under control can actually be very helpful when everything else around you seems like carnage and chaos. You already proved to yourself that you are more than capable of doing this - but right now, you feel like you arent capable of much at all, and that is showing in your lack of self-control when it comes to food choices.

Dont dismiss the things that are causing you to do this as excuses - because that devalues them, and devalues the fact that you are aware, and you do care about the choices you are making, you just dont feel very in control at the moment, which is perfectly understandable.

It is overwhelming at times to think about actually managing to stay on plan for a while. So dont. Take it one meal at a time. And every time you have an on plan meal, mentally praise yourself for keeping control and doing something positive for you. After all, when things arent right elsewhere, its easy to blame yourself and do things that you think make you feel better. These tend however, to have the opposite effect over the longer term. You eat the cake, you feel guilty for eating the cake, your self-esteem drops, you berate yourself, you feel rubbish, you eat the cake again. Its a self-fulfilling cycle of behaviour. You have all the power here. You might not be able to control everything in your life right now, but I pretty much guarantee that once you get a grip of something you CAN control, the rest of it will become a little bit easier to deal with because there will be SOME parts of your life that you feel good about.

Hope that helps x Keep us posted with how you go on.

 

[judimac]

I think we've all been through times like this, and it can lead to you throwing the towel in, and then you really do feel bad. SO, what you need to do is plan. Do BIG legal meals so that you feel full. Go up to 15 syns a day, then you have leeway to have the sort of things you crave, but only in small quantities. Do a pro and con list. All the reasons on one side for why you want to lose weight and what will happen if you don't. Try all your clothes on. What can you get into that you couldn't before you lost what is a wonderful amount of weight! Bin the ones that are too loose! Have you got something you want to wear but can't get into? Hang it on the outside of the wardrobe! Try it on every few days. Take your measurements and have a frontal and sideways on photo taken. You need evidence. Treat yourself to non food things. The clocks have gone forwards, the sun is out. Go for a walk after tea. Can you afford a new top, lipstick, bathoil? Go to a charity shop and buy something to tide you over, or some strawberries just for you. Come on here and moan! DON'T GIVE UP! And be kind to yourself!

 

[goingtobeskinnysoon]

You guys are actually so nice you've nearly brought me to tears!

It's def not being hungry, I'm full as got my eating spot on but then I randomly shovel down syns for the sake of it - almost bingeing or emotional eating, something I've always been very guilty of. I don't keep a food diary on here (do a general one with all my random mumblings instead!) but I do keep track on my fitness pal and have been totally honest with myself ( not something I used to manage...) and I can see exactly where I go wrong. I'm exemplary until 6 and then just go mental.

Had a bit of a motivation today as I realised not only is it 14 weeks until my hol but it's also 8 weeks until some big events I have to go to and if I keep STS I'll have achieved nothing and will still look like this. My initial 1lb per week target wouldn't even get me there after this messing around so I need to nail down. I've done it before, I can do it again. Found some fab outfits in a magazine so thinking they need to go up in the kitchen. Had to go to a work lunch today and there was so much tempting me that for the past few weeks I just would have had but today I didn't. I stuck to it. And I have only had the couple of syns I've estimated for cooking method at lunch and I feel I need to prove to myself I don't need to use them all. We'll see.

Thank you all so much. It was the virtual hug I needed x

 

[evilpenguin]

Yay! So glad we helped

I always find the first day 100% is the hardest, but they get easier after that! Just take it a day at a time! And keep that holiday in mind! Will keep you focused

xxx

 

[goingtobeskinnysoon]

Thanks penguin - you're right, every day I stick at it just makes the next so much more doable. Thank you guys x