Kim's diary of being a new mum

[Dubchick81]

I fell on my feet with J... He was so money sensible his whole life.. He was definitely brought up with the right attitude towards money...
Only for him we'd definitely not have had our house yet.. he put up the full deposit down, paid solicitors bills etc (I WILL give him back half of everything once i've finished paying off my final personal loan which ends in June 2014 so its 50/50 but on all the mortgage papers n deeds etc we're down as 50/50)
He has a savings account with €25k in.. His current account has over €30k in and now he has his new business account which he set up about 6 weeks ago with a couple of grand in there as he's not touched it.. PLUS he has just short of €10k in the credit union....
Our insurance claim paid for allot of decorating etc but furniture n TV n floors n that J's paid for.. Again, I'll give him back half of everything... He's never once asked for it and hinted he wants it.. But I want to know I've paid my way and I'm entitled to half of everything should anything ever go wrong.. We've had a contract drawn up (I asked for it from solicitor when he was sorting out us buying the house) and I've included that in the event J hasn't been paid his dues, he'll get that from the sale of the house.. Obviously we're hoping it'll never come to that but in the event it does, his money is protected..

 

[Kim26]

The whole house buying is a nightmare, we are currently in a shared ownership flat (where we own 30% and we effectively 'rent' the rest of it from a housing association) which was a great scheme to start with but once you are in they just seem to increase your rent and service charge WAY beyond the rate our pay increases, so we wanted to get out.....well let me tell you they certainly sting you on the way out! Plus they are sooo difficult to deal with - our solicitor hates them already and thats really obvious in her letters to us! Anyways, hopefully we can get some more infromation, as it turns out we had what i think is the contract to sell ours sent through yesterday which we signed and dropped back last night, so thats ready whenever the solicitors deem it to be ok. I'm reading it's a good sign that they have even drawn the contracts up in preparation to exchange....but we will see!

We are buying the masionette we are getting with what money we put in to the flat we are in now, and a little help from my mum...without her it wouldn't happen! I can't believe a 2 bed masionette is costing us £238,000....and almost £1200 a month just for the mortgage! eeek! best i don't think about it otherwise i start to freak out about how on earth we can afford for me to be on maternity!

Mike is not good with money and i am the one who's good with money. I had zero debt and a fair bit of savings until we got married, then the honeymoon etc sort of knocked that out and i now have a couple of credit cards, but slowly getting those paid off. Mike on the other hand cannot save...money burns a hole in his pocket lol! Saying that my comments of "well i guess i'll have just have to have 20 weeks maternity then go back as we need the money" seems to have made him think about saving and he's already putting bits away to try and give me some extra time at home with bubs.

Last day of being 23 weeks and it's V-Day tomorrow!

So glad it's Friday as i really did not want to get up this morning!

How are all you girls doing? x

 

[Dubchick81]

The whole house buying is a nightmare, we are currently in a shared ownership flat (where we own 30% and we effectively 'rent' the rest of it from a housing association) which was a great scheme to start with but once you are in they just seem to increase your rent and service charge WAY beyond the rate our pay increases, so we wanted to get out.....well let me tell you they certainly sting you on the way out! Plus they are sooo difficult to deal with - our solicitor hates them already and thats really obvious in her letters to us! Anyways, hopefully we can get some more infromation, as it turns out we had what i think is the contract to sell ours sent through yesterday which we signed and dropped back last night, so thats ready whenever the solicitors deem it to be ok. I'm reading it's a good sign that they have even drawn the contracts up in preparation to exchange....but we will see!

We are buying the masionette we are getting with what money we put in to the flat we are in now, and a little help from my mum...without her it wouldn't happen! I can't believe a 2 bed masionette is costing us £238,000....and almost £1200 a month just for the mortgage! eeek! best i don't think about it otherwise i start to freak out about how on earth we can afford for me to be on maternity!

Mike is not good with money and i am the one who's good with money. I had zero debt and a fair bit of savings until we got married, then the honeymoon etc sort of knocked that out and i now have a couple of credit cards, but slowly getting those paid off. Mike on the other hand cannot save...money burns a hole in his pocket lol! Saying that my comments of "well i guess i'll have just have to have 20 weeks maternity then go back as we need the money" seems to have made him think about saving and he's already putting bits away to try and give me some extra time at home with bubs.

Last day of being 23 weeks and it's V-Day tomorrow!

So glad it's Friday as i really did not want to get up this morning!

How are all you girls doing? x

I think there has to be one money sensible person in any relationship... At least one!! lol
Me and both my exes were just rubbish.. Literally living paycheck to paycheck and getting everything on HP was the perfect answer... Whereas now if something can't be paid outright, J won't allow it.. I needed that...
When we got together I had a car on HP.. A MASSIVE personal loan from the bank.. A credit card bill of €4,500.. An overdraft of €2,500.. Now I've no car loan.. Only a few months left on my bank loan.. Credit Card bill reduced to €1,000.. No overdraft.. And am finally of the mentality if I can't afford to buy outright, I can't have it!! Only took me til 30 to realise I can actually survive without having everything top of the range and out of my financial reach...

 

[sarah_lou1981]

I think there has to be one money sensible person in any relationship... At least one!! lol Me and both my exes were just rubbish.. Literally living paycheck to paycheck and getting everything on HP was the perfect answer... Whereas now if something can't be paid outright, J won't allow it.. I needed that... When we got together I had a car on HP.. A MASSIVE personal loan from the bank.. A credit card bill of EUR4,500.. An overdraft of EUR2,500.. Now I've no car loan.. Only a few months left on my bank loan.. Credit Card bill reduced to EUR1,000.. No overdraft.. And am finally of the mentality if I can't afford to buy outright, I can't have it!! Only took me til 30 to realise I can actually survive without having everything top of the range and out of my financial reach...

We don't buy if we can't afford it out of our wage. We've both learnt our lesson from exes. Mine ran up massive debts in my name, and I mean massive. I was naive after the breakup with my ex hubby and my rebound took me for a ride. So I'm paying that back now because he did a runner. But before that I had savings, nothing on hp, spotless credit history. And I will again soon we've both learnt a huge lesson from it and it's changed how we are with money which is how we've afforded the wedding and baby, plus some help from our parents

 

[Kim26]

I think money is something you definitely learn from your mistakes. Mike has certainly improved since being with me - he had huge debts (still has debts now) from when he wasn't with me because he would see something and buy it and never worry how it was going to be paid off.
I on the other hand have never liked having debt so if i can't afford it i wont buy it! It probably helps that i haven't really ever been a huge shopper so don't tend to go out every weekend and buy loads - i buy when i really need something and i debate for ages over big purchases.

 

[Dubchick81]

We don't buy if we can't afford it out of our wage. We've both learnt our lesson from exes. Mine ran up massive debts in my name, and I mean massive. I was naive after the breakup with my ex hubby and my rebound took me for a ride. So I'm paying that back now because he did a runner. But before that I had savings, nothing on hp, spotless credit history. And I will again soon we've both learnt a huge lesson from it and it's changed how we are with money which is how we've afforded the wedding and baby, plus some help from our parents

My ex used to ask me regularly to get a loan from a loan shark for him.. swearing he'd pay it n never miss a payment.. Fortunately I knew how crap he was with paying the one he had from the loan shark in his own name so knew not too.. But I leant him so much money, my Mam leant him money.... Never seen a penny of it back.. But thankfully it wasn't loans for him that I was left paying...
And only coz i'd already seen how rubbish he was.. coz I'd have got them in a heartbeat for him I was so blinded!!!
Jonathan has spent 4 years travelling Australia, Canada and some of America also seeing Thailand etc... And our mortgage was his first ever loan!!! He is so teaching our kids the value of money.. If there's one thing I learned from years of debt n loans and living paycheck to paycheck, its that my kids will not be the same... Or at least they'll be taught the value from a young age and what they do in their adult life is up to them.. As long as I know I've tried my best

 

[missy1978]

I can only really blame myself for my debts, although I did have one rather unhelpful ex who screwed me over with bills. It was the redundancy that did for me - was managing until then and six months out of work just did for us. I will prob not be able to get credit again but I wouldn't get it if I could! I find it liberating tbh having no overdraft or credit cards. I have debt but that can only go down right? I'll never take credit again if I can help it xxx

 

[Kim26]

I can only really blame myself for my debts, although I did have one rather unhelpful ex who screwed me over with bills. It was the redundancy that did for me - was managing until then and six months out of work just did for us. I will prob not be able to get credit again but I wouldn't get it if I could! I find it liberating tbh having no overdraft or credit cards. I have debt but that can only go down right? I'll never take credit again if I can help it xxx

Redundancies are awful, i really don't know how people cope and there never seems to be the help for those people...yet if you don't work at any point in your life you get more than those who work but lose their job through no fault of their own - thats the bit i don't understand about the benefits system! I have credit cards now but once they are gone they are getting chopped up and cancelled. I hate having debt, would rather save for 10 months to buy something that pay it off for years because you can only ever afford the minimum payment.

Yep debt can only go down and how lovely will it feel when it's all gone!

 

[missy1978]

Redundancies are awful, i really don't know how people cope and there never seems to be the help for those people...yet if you don't work at any point in your life you get more than those who work but lose their job through no fault of their own - thats the bit i don't understand about the benefits system! I have credit cards now but once they are gone they are getting chopped up and cancelled. I hate having debt, would rather save for 10 months to buy something that pay it off for years because you can only ever afford the minimum payment. Yep debt can only go down and how lovely will it feel when it's all gone!

It was crap, three months before I got the chop Colin did. He was only just back in work part time when I got the push! So we just never really recovered. He got no redundancy either as he'd not been there long enough, it was rubbish You do feel like there's no help - we applied for housing benefit as soon as my redundancy money started running out and by the time they sorted it out I was back in work! In any case all we got was about £30 a month which hardly touched the sides. I can't even think how people live off benefits when we were on a very low income and apparently entitled to bugger all :/

My debts aren't going anywhere at the mo, all of my repayments are down to £1 per month due to going on mat leave but hoping to increase them substantially once I'm back at work

 

[Dubchick81]

I can only really blame myself for my debts, although I did have one rather unhelpful ex who screwed me over with bills. It was the redundancy that did for me - was managing until then and six months out of work just did for us. I will prob not be able to get credit again but I wouldn't get it if I could! I find it liberating tbh having no overdraft or credit cards. I have debt but that can only go down right? I'll never take credit again if I can help it xxx

I'm the same I have to say... Once I've cleared my loan and CC i'll never get credit again... Partly coz J would kill me LOL
But like, once i've cleared my bank loan, i'll have an extra €414 per month... Like, that's almost what I put into our joint account every month for my half of mortgage, bills n food... And I have NOTHING to show for it!!!
If it wasn't for that loan, I'd live quite comfortable on what pittens they give for maternity benefit

 

[sarah_lou1981]

I'm the same I have to say... Once I've cleared my loan and CC i'll never get credit again... Partly coz J would kill me LOL But like, once i've cleared my bank loan, i'll have an extra EUR414 per month... Like, that's almost what I put into our joint account every month for my half of mortgage, bills n food... And I have NOTHING to show for it!!! If it wasn't for that loan, I'd live quite comfortable on what pittens they give for maternity benefit

We're the same. We share all our money but including shopping and petrol our bills are about £1700 a month. We pay £400 a month in debt and Tom brings home £1300 a month easy so we'd be laughing if it wasn't for the debt. When we wanted a new car we saved up for months to buy it but bought it at 6 months old finance free

 

[Dubchick81]

We're the same. We share all our money but including shopping and petrol our bills are about £1700 a month. We pay £400 a month in debt and Tom brings home £1300 a month easy so we'd be laughing if it wasn't for the debt. When we wanted a new car we saved up for months to buy it but bought it at 6 months old finance free

When we moved into our house we decided we'd each deposit €550 per month into our joint account and all house bits would come from there... So that's mortgage, electric, heating, internet, shopping & our home insurance is due in 3 weeks so that'll come out of there too...
So if I wasn't a niave n silly person for so long and hadn't built up debt, that would be my total outgoings.. Leaving me with €500 for myself each month of maternity leave... But because I was a div for so long... €414 of that will be my bank loan.. And my CC can just wait til I'm back in work... I could I guess ring the bank and ask for reduced payments for a the time I'm off work and extend it a little but I'd rather pay n get rid of it.. So I'll go on leave in Feb & return to work Maybe Septmeber.. So I'll pay the bank loan for Feb, March, April, May & June then be cleared So July & August should be OK months and then back to work in September.. Depending on dates full pay hopefully.. Then I'll be laughing when i'm back to work.. If I come back full time!!!

 

[PrincessPeach]

Hope you're having a nice weekend Kim x

 

[PrincessPeach]

oooh and happy 24 weeks for yesterday!!

V week! xx

 

[Kim26]

Re: Kim's pregnancy diary

oooh and happy 24 weeks for yesterday!!

V week! xx

Awww Thanks yay to getting to V week

Had a busy weekend seeing people yesterday and then photo session today. Now the joyful task of going to sainsburys for the weekly shop.....urgh!

Hope you're having a fab weekend xx

 

[missy1978]

Happy v week! Hope it's a good one so far xxx

 

[sarah_lou1981]

Happy V week lovely. Another milestone done

 

[Kim26]

Re: Kim's pregnancy diary

Thanks girls x

 

[Kim26]

Re: Kim's pregnancy diary

Baby's taught me a lesson today....
I need to eat and drink or I feel like sh*t! I ate breakfast this morning and had a glass of oj then didn't really have anything until just now (well a sip of water at my photo session. ..cant drink much or I need to wee every 20mins) I tried to eat a kitkat when I dropped my photography stuff back at my mums but made me feel sick so had to bin it, going round sainsburys my head was killing it felt like it might explode! Home and drink drunk and some toast and ready brek eaten ( strangely really fancied ready brek... maybe for the milk?!) Now I'm planted on the sofa and intend to do nothing until dinner needs doing! Lesson learnt that I have to make time to eat and drink or baby gets cross!

 

[missy1978]

Baby's taught me a lesson today.... I need to eat and drink or I feel like sh*t! I ate breakfast this morning and had a glass of oj then didn't really have anything until just now (well a sip of water at my photo session. ..cant drink much or I need to wee every 20mins) I tried to eat a kitkat when I dropped my photography stuff back at my mums but made me feel sick so had to bin it, going round sainsburys my head was killing it felt like it might explode! Home and drink drunk and some toast and ready brek eaten ( strangely really fancied ready brek... maybe for the milk?!) Now I'm planted on the sofa and intend to do nothing until dinner needs doing! Lesson learnt that I have to make time to eat and drink or baby gets cross!

Bless you, it's so easy done. Even once ms goes you suffer for not eating properly. I had brunch today instead if breakfast and lunch and then nothing apart from some Jaffa cakes until 8 when Colin got in from work. Was very stupid and I felt mega ill by the time dinner was ready. Plus baby was giving me a right kicking, hungry little dude no doubt Hope you're feeling better by now! xxx