Hi guys, My name is Holly and I decided to join up for some support and friendship to keep me going! I have struggled with my weight since childhood.. now I am 39 and I always said that if i dont do this by the time I am 40 I will give up! I have followed the same pattern for years, I lose several stones really quickly, drop several dress sizes by being really strict and getting obsessed with the figures on the scale... then I lose motivation, decide to have a few days 'off' and then end up gorging myself on all the foods I have deprived myself of for months, and then I end up putting at least 3 or 4 stone back on even faster than I lost it. At my highest 4 years ago i was 22 stone... at my lowest last year i was 14 stone and looking/feeling so much better.... but then christmas came and I fell off the wagon, having family meals, eating fast foods and all the usual stuff we eat at that time of year, and that was the end of my diet. I gained several stone once again and couldnt even get my head in gear to do anything about it until May this year. But for the last 10 weeks or so i have been back in the game... but this time I am doing things differently.... I am treating this as a change of life rather than a 'diet'... because I have to be able to keep this going for the rest of my life, not just a few months... I cant face going through all this again, so this time the weight has to stay off because I know that if I gain it all back again I wont have the motivation to start all over again. So, I am not weighing myself, I have no idea what i weigh right now.. I dont want to get obsessed again and start depriving myself more and more and the weight loss slows down... I am just focusing on eating healthy foods, drinking lots of water, watching my calorie intake and trying to be a bit more active, while still having the odd meal out or fast food treat once every couple of weeks just to keep it realistic (that has to be better than eating bad stuff every day like i used to, right?) - I can feel that I have already lost a fair amount of weight since i started this.. I am gradually fitting back into clothes that I havent been able to wear for months... and I have one pair of size 16 skinny jeans that I know i was wearing when I was down to my 14 stone weight... so I am going to patiently wait until they fit me again! - so thats my story - I am hoping to make new friends here and keep the momentum going for good!