**Magic Weighloss Monday - Hour by Hour Thread**

[emmapetty]

Summaya - oh hun what a **** thing to be happening. Are you 100% sure? Is this the first time this has happened? It could be innocent, maybe he got ratted and stayed at a mates? Put it this way, I agree with you that if he is cheating a good slap and bags of clothes outside the front door is def the best thing to do. BUT if he hasn't cheated it could be seen as an over-reaction and a very steep hill to climb. Have you a) checked his phone? > I would be tempted to do this. b) Have you rang his work? I would defo do this, and ask his boss whether he was with him last night, make up some excuse - say that your little girl is not in good health and that his home number would put your mind at rest so you can contact him "just in case". Oh hun I want to give you a big hug. You must be feeling rubbish. ((((hugs))))

 

[sumayyah]

its the first time thou he disappears to london alot
to be honest he came to visit me in may for couple days and just wouldnt leave, ive paid for everything so why would he leave when he was getting free rent, free food etc. he started working 3 weeks ago and does not contribute at all
he has 3 phones and he keeps them on him at all times, who takes the phone to the shower with them

 

[Klev]

Sorry if it sounds a bit harsh, but sounds like its not an even relationship anyways! Even if he is not cheating. But by the sounds of it he is a profiteer (not sure thats the word i am looking for......) and if you have no clue what he is doing in london when he disappears, who's to say he hasnt got a second you hanging around over there?? I would try to confront him about it though. But then again i don't know him.

I think you are the best judge of the situation, and i fully understand if you are fed up. I would too if that happened to me!!!

 

[emmapetty]

True hun. I trust my HB completely, but do check his phone - purely because he makes arrangements with his family and forgets to tell me! Typical. If I was you I would ask him right out, tell him you aint stupid and bloody stand your ground. Then I'd tell him to get out of your house while you have some thinking time and tell him you will text/call him when you have decided what you want to do. Use this time to seriously think about what he has said. If he has been cheating and you are convinced by it - i'd bleach his clothes, bag them and leave them outside. Lock the house up, text him and tell him to get home. Leave a note on the bag saying "you have 24 hours to get your cr*p off my property, or it's being burned. lol Sorry - i know I am harsh, but cheating where there is a little girl involved - NO EXCUSE. I'd also get yourself to the Dr's to be on the safe side, you never know where he has been and it is better to be on the safe side hun. Hugs x x x

 

[sumayyah]

thing is ive tried talking to him about the fact that hes just here cos hes no where else to go and its easy for him and he crys and starts with the we get on well, i care bout you and kaya speech and i cant deal with men that cry
he acctually just called me to tell me hes at work and is eating a bag of friggin chips, i hung up on him

 

[emmie2726]

Thanks for your support everyone. I am so sorry you are in this situation Sumayyah, be stong and follow our gut instinct. x

 

[emmapetty]

Summayah - the cruel truth is hun - if you don't have trust, you have nothing. Sorry to be blunt. But you can not continue in a relationship where you are constantly thinking that he is being dishonest with you about his whereabouts. No one can live like that. It's just not doable. You need to think of your little one too, she needs a stable home, stable father figure and most importantly a stable Mummy. hUGS X X X

 

[Mrs Taurus]

Blimey Emma it is a stressful time, and with totm as well no wonder you are fighting your food demons, but don't let the little beeps win,because then you won't just be stressed,but have lowered you self esteem.
Mr T is exceptionally stressed, and had a face like a slapped bum all weekend,however I know why-his job is exceptionally tough right now. I really felt like a glass of wine to dull the tense atmosphere, but then I know if I'd drunk I would have felt pants,then probably had a massive go at him. However this diet is quickly restoring my low self-esteem that was in my boots before, and because I am feeling soooooo much better in myself I have been able to support Mr T, not scream at him for wallowing in his mood and feel great about myself for being so controlled(even though I do a lot of swearing in my head as I roll my eyes).
There are some things we have no control over,like your landlady, but those areas ie food where we can take control can make us feel so much better in our heads.
Enjoy all your lovely teas when you get home,plus chill out with some tv.
Good luck with the landlady x

 

[emmapetty]

Thank you Mrs T. I always seem to get stressed at this time of the year. Mainly due to the stress of Christmas. If i'm honest I am very lucky in that my Mum always goes completely bonkers at Christmas, showering me and HB in gifts (yes I know this is lovely of her) but I get cross because I always feel guilty that I can not match her many presents. Plus it's hb's birthday on 8th Dec and we have booked a table for 7 (MIL has invited her parents along) and I have had to pay a £15 deposit per person (£105) which I will get back, but still I have to wait until the 5th Dec! Slight nuisance! I'm actually going to be putting my bridesmaid dresses on ebay (put them on twice before with no joy ) So I'm going to try again. Plus I have 2 coats in size 24 that are way too big that I'm going to sell. I'm considering selling my bridal dress too. Especially if I am going to have to come up with my part of the deposit for a new place (if this is what landlady is going to be visiting us for!) I'll be fine, I just have to sit and 'work out' everything. I know I am ok financially, I just have to have it set in stone in my head before I can relax! lol

 

[Mrs Taurus]

Think your e-bay sales sound a fab idea, know what you mean about having things set in stone, I am much the same. Earlier today found out that hb not going overseas with work on sat now, I should be glad but selfishly I had psyched myself up for it, and am now anxious about when the trip will eventually take place,as don't want it to interfere with xmas plans or Master T's bday at end of Jan.....luckily am on ss+ so can have a nice milky coffee to de-stress with.x

 

[kerryberry]

I would kick him out just for talking about chips no but joking apart you know in your heart what you have to do fingers crossed for you hun.

Good luck with the ebay sales I am doing the same for extra cash too.

 

[AlexIce]

Klev - No I didn't find a hot drink. I tried mint tea but couldn't drink it. I will just have to stick with the CD vegetable drink which I love but it would be nice to be allowed more than one cup of it a day! Hopefully I shouldn't have so many problems with being cold from now on as my heating works now.

Emma - the "if hunger isn't the problem, food isn't the answer" was something I saw on someone's signature on their posts here and I think it is the single sentence or thought that has done me the most good in the past 20 years.

Sumayyah - I feel for you. Try to stay calm but don't let him get away with anything. hugs

 

[AlexIce]

Back again - sigh the gremlins are being very annoying this evening. Three hours to go - roll on 10pm!
... and guess what - as my heating is working I am going to get on the bike and do a few kilometres!

 

[sumayyah]

well aparently im just being stupid and am projecting, so apparently im the flirt and hes a good guy, yeah right

 

[JimmyShoo]

Sumayyah i feel for you hon, i would defo be suspecting but thats in the Taurean nature. My DH has never given me any reason to suspect him of anything, and tbh wouldn't have the time to mess around. I hope your ok and keep posting for support. Don't tlet him turn this around on you hon..............he was in the wrong never came home when he had a perfectly good bed to come home to drunk or not.

Muchas Lovas to you hon xx

 

[sumayyah]

murders wrong right?

hes told me im just making myself look silly and i can ask his mate if he slept at the car wash last night. like im gonna take his mates word for it, that guys known to put it about grrrrrrrr