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Mollys CD Diary


Silver Member
Hope you dont mind but i feel the need to write down my thoughts as i head towards goal.
This is my last restart. Last year I lost 3 and a half stone, got to a much better place but became complacent, didnt get to goal and piddled about for months buying products, using them along side nibbling, picking, socialising etc and so have put a stone on.
I hadnt seen my CDC since beginning of March until Tuesday morning last week I had had enough of clothes getting tight again and i woke up feeling positive and wanted to get back on the wagon. I had a few packs left so emailed my CDC to say i was going to give it a go again. She asked my round that afternoon for a 'new start' chat and weigh in. So far i havent looked back.
We have a good social life, we like to have our drinks and nibbles with friends but I really realise now that I am going to have a battle with my weight for life and its only me that can win it for me.
My OH works nights and even though i have kids i miss the company of an adult all the time. I have been drinking wine more and more and easily finish a bottle of wine to myself any night of the week. That in itself is bad enough but with every glass i seek comfort with crisps, cheese etc and so my weight, skin, health has suffered. I was waking up most mornings feel yuck and with a demanding job it was taking me til 11am coffee break to feel human again. Yes, drink was starting to take hold of me and its not a slippery slope i want to slide on. There, thats the first time i've admitted it out loud and i feel better for it. I've known it for some time, I dont feel its anything i need to get councilling for, i just need to be the stronger partner in the relationship between me and Chardonnay!
So, to the present moment, Day 6 and i'm feeling good, the sun is shining i've been sleeping well all week. I'm not feeling the need to eat although i always feel hungry. I dont know if i can make it to target but everyday is a fresh challenge.
Bit of a ramble i'm afraid, I am not writing this for any reason other than me needing to do it for me. I am hoping that this is the only negative sounding post i put in here!
Good luck to everyone on their journey.
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This is the last time!!
Hey Molly, well done for 'voicing' your thoughts, it helps to see things in black and white sometimes doesnt it?
I am not fond of alcohol, but my addiction is far worse...it's food. And it's not something one can live without (aside from good ols SS that is). Hopefully you'll learn more about yourself as you progress on your new journey, and find a way to balance things out. Apparently, all in moderation is the key...if only moderation was that simple eh?

I for one do not feel that your post is any way negative, I think it shows great courage, and positivity...small steps achieve great things.



Silver Member
It really helps to write things down doesn't it?! , I've just recently started a (pen and paper) diary, I just find it easier and more to hand most of the time but I'm considering starting one on here when I start moving up the steps.


likes to post
well done for getting it written down molly.

I'm pretty much the same as you, I lost a couple of stone last year, but since feb have been messing about and using cd but still picking etc. I didn't put on any weight, but I didn't lose any either I'm on day 5 of my restart and feel more positive.

Good luck in your cd journey I'm sure you will reach goal this time.


Silver Member
I've had a good day today. This morning OH and I went for an 8 mile cycle round the local forestry commission woods. We didnt go overly fast but we paced it out and didnt stop. We bought bikes year past Christmas and they've been out about twice. This year we ARE going to use them. I'm going to stop taking the car the teeny distance to the shop and i'm going to bike or walk there.
We've done a fair bit of work in the garden and i'm going back out there for a while after tea.
I'm hungry today, that never goes away, but i've been totally focussed and as its been such a lovely day i'm thinking on to some nice clothes for the summer. There are some beautiful dresses in the shops just now that i would like to wear. Gosh, it will be so nice to wear a lovely dress instead of the usual jeans and baggy top.


Cambridge Consultant
Hey Molly..
Good on you hon.. for writing down your thought and feelings... I am sure it really does help...
I can understand you find it tough being alone in the evening... My husband works alot on the weekends and I find that hard sometimes too.....
Good luck your doing fab.. You can do it x


Silver Member
We've woken up to a wonderfully hot sunny day again and i'm feeling good.
Just been to first WI and i've lost 8lbs and about 6 inches across my measurements. Still feeling I can really do this but i've got to use all my determination now as my CDC on holiday so it will be three whole weeks til i see her again. Looking back her notes I am only 2lbs heavier than this time last year and 6lbs heavier than the lowest i got with her which was 11.4. Today i am 11.10 so 6lbs is surely possible in 3 weeks if i keep myself on track.
I can do this! I can do this!
Not sure what we are up to today. Its a local holiday here so kids are off today and its inservice tomorrow. I always make myself feel i should be doing something. I've put washing out, there is an ironing to do and hoovering but why should we not just enjoy a day off. Its so nice out everything else can wait.


Silver Member
Woken up really hungry today. Think its mind over matter. Got to sit through a day of in-service which will be mind numbingly boring. I work with special needs children so my day is normally non stop and i have no time to think about food til i come home (olden days i would graze through fridge and cupboards til bed time!).
Normally dont have a pack until lunch but i'm just finishing a tetra as i dont want to feel unwell during day. If the hunger stays i shall have a fourth pack later.
WI was yesterday and CDC goes on hol on Friday so i wont see her for just over 3 weeks. I am a serial weigher before showering in the morning so i've taken battery out of scales and asked OH to hide it. I think this will help me stay on track as like most, i get very disheartened when the scales dont move. Hoping for 6lbs in 3 weeks. If I continue to feel this positive it is very possible.


likes to post
hey molly I work with special needs children as well. They are just doing their GCSE's at the moment.

Good luck while your cdc is away, mine has just come back off hols, and I found it quite hard, I think because I knew I wouldn't be weighed for a couple of weeks, but I'm sure you'll be fine.


Silver Member
I work in a primary school. Really really love doing it but can be quite physically and mentally draining sometimes.
Can't believe i have managed 7 days 100% SSing. I feel really quite proud of myself. I dont even know if i managed that on my very first CD journey!
Still feeling very positive. I was feeling really bloated last week and i think that was the turning point to losing weight again. Already i feel the bloated feeling has gone, i'm almost at the weight i got to last year and i dont want to become complacent at this early stage as i want to stay focussed until much closer to target.
Theres lots of good support here and everyone is doing so well, i want to be up there with the best of them. There is some fantastic weight losses going on.
Off to make tea for the troops, no doubt it will be the usual 'I dont want that' and to keep the peace i end up making three different meals. What ever happened to the 'i'm making one evening meal a day and if you dont like it you can go hungry' Huh, thats just not worth the earache either. Being mum, you just cant win!


Silver Member
Its been a good day today. I just cant shake the hunger pangs, does anyone else feel them there all the time or is it just me?
Anyway, for the moment i seem to be able to get through the day ignoring them. The fact i got through the weekend is a major milestone and as i'm going back to work tomorrow its halfway through to the next weekend. Time just flies so quickly.


likes to post
well done on being 100% for 7 days, you have done so well to stay so focused.

I work in a secondary school, and it too can be physically and mentally draining, but also very rewarding. I would love to work in a special school, but its so hard getting a job in one.


Silver Member
I'm pleased to be writing again that i've not strayed today and been 100%.
It was weird not weighing myself this morning which i always do before showering but feel its still going well. Someone posted earlier about using the wii fit and i'd totally forgotten abut that so from now i'm going to forget i heard that!
Have been for a walk with the dog which i always enjoy. I walked with a friend so a bit slower than usual but thats ok at least i was out.
Have read Tillys post about water so i've lost count but i think i've had 4 1/2 or 5 litres today. Thats more than i've ever had in one day so probably be up through the night several times.
I've been sleeping really well so much so that i'm waking a good half hour before my alarm so it feels as though i'm having a wee lie in.
I know my sleep is good because i am not drinking alcohol or eating too late at night, neither of which i am missing at all. At the moment i feel i could do this diet forever. (Don't worry i'm well aware that feeling could go at any moment).

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