My 20lb diary

M

mollydog

Silver Member
I've got a bit of determination to get this last few pounds off but got quite a lot of emotions to deal with this week with the loss of my Grandad and the funeral on Thursday.
If nobody minds i'd like to use this thread as a diary just to help through the next few days and hopefully the wonderful support on this site will see me closer to target by the time i go on holiday.
 
So, here i go. I've started well today. Its a lovely day and i've got two loads of washing out and another one to go. I've had over a litre of water and one shake. Just been at my Grandads house but i'm ok. I know he's gone and i've accepted it but still doesnt seem real.
As soon as i came back i've reached for the ham and egg mayo in the fridge as well as diet lemonade. I've only had a wee bit but its still too much so on here to keep busy.
Better have another couple of big glasses of water to flush that through.
Off to keep myself busy with the washing and I really must get some weeding done in the garden.
Hopefully OH or DDs will offer to do tea.
Best Wishes
 
Did really well yesterday until i went to help my mum and her sister start with the clearing of my Grandads house. We shared all the in-date food between us and when i got home i had to have a twix finger. Which in turn led to little nibble after little nibble. In the end i had finished off a very tasty homemade lamb curry and a bottle of wine!
So, yet again, i'm starting again today. Work is easy as i'm so busy i dont think about food until i have soup at lunch time. Supposed to see CDC later for weigh in but it will be a weigh up!
I feel i'm not firing on all cylinders today, not poorly, but just cant be bothered. I woke at 1am and dozed in and out of sleep til about 5am so probably just tired.
I'm away for a big glass of iced water.
 
Well, not so good again today. I am so tired i feel i could cry. My house looks like a war zone, why does it feel i am the only one that ever picks up anything? Had quite a few people ask after my grandad so feeling down having to explain several times but they're intentions are good and i appreciate the concern.
Had a soup at coffee break as i was on late lunch and knew i would be really hungry by then. Had lettuce tomato and cottage cheese with 1/2 litre of water, so far so good. Came home and had two twix, coffee and a bourbon. Grazed the turkey and ham in the fridge and i've just had a baked potato with tuna mayo.
I just cannot get into this. Although reading this back, the solution would seem to be that i have to keep out of the house til teatime at which point i wave a magic wand to make a beautiful meal appear for the family, wish the dishwasher to fill and empty itself whilst i stay away from food but having a lovely bath.........oops just hit my head on the computer desk when i dozed off into that thought!!
I'm way behind on the water so i better get a few big glasses of the stuff into me and give myself yet another talking too!
Best wishes
 
Hey, how are you getting on today? Just been reading through your diary and just want to say my thoughts are with you, it's not an easy time, it's times like these that really test us and we discover just what triggers us to snack on things eh. We're all here for you :) You have 20lb to go and I have 17 to go so lets stick together and try our best to keep each other motivated. I find that I'm ok during the day but when DH comes home I want to snack for some reason! So far so good today, I'm splitting my 3ltrs of fluid between water and peppermint tea, seems less like glugging water all the time as I get fed up with that.

Hope your day is going well so far :)
 
Had an emotional day as it was my Grandads funeral today. Very small but the service was a civil service so no hymns but a lovely ulogy(sp) read by a very nice man. (No further sympathies required, you have all been so nice and very much appreciated)
Light lunch after service but as it was sausage rolls and sandwiches i have had a bit of a carb fest. I'm not particularly hungry now, probably as i've just had a packet of crisps, 2 choc chip cookies and a choc cup cake!
3 weeks today and i will have arrived in Lanzarote. I am so looking forward to it. Being able to leave dull and rainy Fife for the sunny skies and heat of the Canaries - who wouldn't. So, if i'm going to get a few pounds off, it has to be now. Because i have comfort eaten for the last week I know that i've put on 2lbs on top of the 2lbs that i gain and lose every other week.
I'm really tired today so what better reason to have an early night. I'm going to get a good few glasses of water in me and get into it tomorrow. Half a stone off is very achievable in 3 weeks.
I'm sure i will need to be back here again tonight.
 
Hey, I did the same today, was WI dya so decided to have a treat, hot chocolate and a choco brownie at the cafe next to us, nevermind, new day tomorrow and we can both start a fresh eh.
 
Morning.
I had fairly good sleep and i've woken feeling positive. 3 weeks today and i'll be on hol, i am so needing a holiday in the sun, so this is it.
I can do it, I can do it, I can do it, I can do it!!
I'm having a shake just now which is early for me, i'll be fine at work, then i've got jobs to keep me busy til tea. Doing dance class tonight then i'm off to a 40th. That will be a test, cant even drive as its only across the road but i shall wear my positive hat on my head and keep focussed. I can do it, I can do it, I can do it!
Hope anyone reading this has a good day.
 
Stood on scales this morning (unofficial) and i think i've lost a couple of pounds but the proof will be with CDC later.
Yet again i've woken up positive and really want to do this. I feel a cold coming on so whilst i dont want to be poorly, i'm hoping it will suppress my appetite and give me a headstart!
Best wishes
 
Just back from weigh in and i've lost a pound. Not particularly good but i did only restart again this morning! CDC checked back and I have gained and lost the same 2 or 3 lbs since April - didnt think it was that long!!
I have just had my 3rd shake as i'm really hungry so its gonna be a long night. I'll go to keep fit later and then i've a meeting so that should keep my mind occupied.
Best wishes
Oh, does anyone know why i can't or how i update my weight loss ticker? I've left clicked and it doesnt let me open link but it does for my holiday one. Thanks
 
Well, i've had enough. I just can't do this anymore. I'm beating myself up all the time. Certainly would like to lose the last 20lbs but in all honesty i'm happy where i am. We are going all inclusive in 11 days time. We've done all inclusive before when i was at my heaviest and i came back the same weight i went. I know it was because all the fruits, salads etc were freshly prepared and i didnt have to stand for ages chopping and cutting so i'm hoping that this hotel will have appetising buffets that i can pick healthily from.
We didnt go away last year so its exactly two years since i've had a holiday and i am really ready to go. I've bought myself some lovely inexpensive clothes and i'm looking forward to getting a bit of a tan and feeling good instead of hiding under baggy t-shirts and long trousers. Hopefully the same reasons will give me a bit of a push to continue to goal when i get back.
I will still be popping into minimins as there was many a day i couldnt have got through without the support here from virtual friends.
best wishes to each and all
 
reading through this over the last couple of weeks hon i think you should be trying a higher plan that lets you have some food or another diet. there is no point in feeling bad about yourself all the time. ss isn't for everyone. it wasn't for me. i'm on the 1000 plan which i find satisfying and much easier to stick to.

have a truly fantastic holiday. you deserve it :)

abz xx
 
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