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Mystic_miss' diary!!

Oooh, a place to write down everything! I can prattle away to my heart's content, how wonderful :D

So, Paul McKenna. God, I want this to work for me, it sounds to good to be true! Eat whatever I want? Hmmm, OK, after all, if I diet I end up fatter anyway so it's not really going to do any harm.

I'm going to use the CD tonight - I've never been hypnotized before I hope it works! :confused:

So today, I ate the following:

Weetabix minis, Mullar light, grapes

Sugar free jelly, Coco pops cereal bar, apple

Jacket potato, salad, ham (Left half - thanks Mr Mckenna!)

Another mullar light!

Sweet and sour chicken and rice. (Again, Left half. hmmm?)

I'm not supposed to weigh myself for two weeks and I'm not supposed to calorie count either, so this could actually be a pretty dull diary, but If it serves as a distraction then thats good!

I have to say, I've eaten more healthily than I thought I would, given free reign to eat whatever I fancied. No McDonalds or galaxy chocolate in sight, maybe there is something to this?
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Ok, so the first proper day of the new and improved me. Turns out hypnosis is pretty boring, It may prove to be a bit difficult motivating myself to listen to it. (How lazy does that sound lol?!)

This eating slowly and enjoying every bite business is also proving harder than expected. I have to separate myself from all distractions - tv, parents, magazines, as i'm beginning to realise that I have an appalling attention span, I find my mind drifting off to something else and I'm constantly pulling myself back to focus on the task at hand. All that aside, I feel pretty good. Not hungry, In control and more relaxed than usual. So, Heres what I ate today:

Weetabix minis. (Interesting, ate them so slowly they went soggy and gave about a quarter to the dogs.), 2 Plums, half a muller light.
Cereal bar (Nibbled throughout morning - yes! one cereal bar!)
Ham and salad sandwich (About 3 quarters), Cucumber sticks, Half a packet of crisps.
Muller light (Yes, its an addiction) apple
Pasta with tomatos, mushroom, peppers and chicken, garlic bread. (Ate less than half, but was a very large portion.)

Is this good? God, on any other diet it would be cause to say "sod it" and break open the Ben and jerrys, but I suppose the fact that I actually have not finished an entire meal is something to go on? Oh, this is SO frustrating!
Good grief, what a day! I HATE, HATE, HATE Wednesdays. Spending 10 hours at work minus a break is quite simply torture, especially when the children are as high as kites and nothing is where its supposed to be because your swapping classrooms. urgh!
Anyway, work stuff aside, how was today????? Weeeeelllll, It would appear that a minor hangover is not conductive to Mr mCk'S system. Leaping out of bed in a panic 30 mins before you need to leave the house, feeling sick and head achy equals picking at a bowl of cereal and a piece of toast before deciding to risk it and go to work on an empty stomach. And then, for various, very dull reasons, I couldn't find time to eat until 10.30 , even though I was starving pretty much the minute I walked into the classroom. This lead to stuffing two chocolate biscuits in my mouth at break time and then feeling guilty for the rest of the morning.

I redeemed myself a little at lunch time and didn't eat much, but again, found myself hungry all afternoon, and ate loads so by tea time, I hate very little. Is this how its going to go? a sort of grazing process throughout the day? Could become quite time consuming!

Right, heres the damage!
3 spoonfuls of coco pops, half a slice of toast with Jam
Two chocolate digestives
3 quarters of ham sandwich, cucumber sticks, cadbury's creme agg
Cereal bar, apple, rice crackers, half slice of toast and chocolate spread
Chicken korma ready meal and giant naan bread (Half of each.)

I make that dangerously close to 2000 calories. NO! Mustn't count them! Bad!!
I really feel like I've messed this up. Surely its not right to eat 2 packets of crisps and half large galaxy bar of an evening? And I'm still hungry. Stupid Paul mcKenna. Theres no way I'm gonna lose weight on this, and don't get me started on not weighing myself.
Ok, I feel better today. Thanks for the kind comments. It's all good as long as I just FOCUS.

So, today, My "90 day success journal" Arrived, and I think it's going to really help me stay on track. I'm a right one for ticking lists off, so hopefully that will motivate me until I see results.

I do have a confession though, I broke a rule and weighed myself this morning. Mostly out of total fear that I had gained a stone in three days. It's fine, My weight is the same, which means that i'm clearly not eating as much as it feels. So, hopefully now I can get to Easter day without weighing myself. Thats my current goal -No weighing until Easter. Also, I'm going to stop listing what i've eaten - it panics me!
It's like I've turned a bit of a corner! It occurred to me last night that what I have been doing is noticing I am hungry and then thinking "It's lunch / break time in an hour, i'll just wait a bit." But this is not the point of this system. Bloody fool. So, today, I stuffed my pockets with raisins, cucumber and jelly tots (Hey, the man says eat what you want, who cares if its an odd combo?!) and IT WORKED! I've not been really hungry all day, just ticking along quite happily. Feel peckish, eat a jelly tot. Goodness, it so simple. Now, if only I could stop my brain trying to figure out the calories I've consumed, we'd be good to go!

I just want to add that the cornish pasty I had for lunch was the most delicious thing I have eaten in a long time. yummy
Ok, I've hit another challenge this morning - My Mother. She told me off for "Wasting so much food." Just now. Both Mum and Dad are VERY overweight and are full members to what Mr McK calls the "Empty plate Dad club" It makes them really cross to see food left on a plate and my would rather make himself sick by eating leftovers than through something in the bin.

So, this morning, I had half an orange and most of a yogurt in the fridge from yesterday, which I thought i'd like for breakfast. I decided I was still hungry after eating this, so I popped a hot cross bun in the toaster. I wasn't thinking about it, because If I had been I would have only toasted half, but hey, its first thing on saturday morning, my mind is elsewhere!

Anyway, I ate half and then realized I was full so asked Mum if she wanted the other half to which she responded with this:

"No I don't, you wanted it, you eat it. It's disgusting that you are wasting so much food and I'm fed up with it."
So I said:
"I'm not wasting food, most of it goes in the fridge for another time."
M: "You have eaten no more than half you dinner all week, you can't just waste food like that, it's expensive and there are people in the world who would love your leftovers." (Please bear in mind that I pay a third of the food bill, so Its not like it's her money I'm "wasting")
Me: "Right, well I'll send my leftovers to Africa shall I? It's just as much of a waste to eat food your body doesn't need."
M "Don't be so stupid." She then walked off.

I feel really upset by this! I actually sat and finished the hot cross bun just to make her happy. Is it any wonder I've always been over weight?!! So I guess from now on I'm just going to have to be really careful about not letting her see how much I've eaten. Which is ridiculous and makes me sound like an anorexic. The really annoying thing is, I've just got the hang of this system and feel really good about it, then Mum comes along and destroys all my positive feelings in one go.
Stuff Paul McKenna, he's an arse. Heres my new plan:

Breakfast: Cereal and fruit 250
Snack: Coffee 50
Lunch: soup, slice of bread, cucumber 250
Snack: coffee, Rice cakes 100
Dinner: Salad. 200
Snack: Options hot chocolate, cereal bar 150

total: 1000 cals a day. Combine with 90 mins exercise. TEACH ME TO BE FATTY. I DON'T DESERVE TO ENJOY WHAT I EAT
Hey, just reading through your diary. Did you lose any weight on the paul mckenna plan?

Kirsty xx

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