New attitude issue - a minor yet growing irritation

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by MissPinky, 18 July 2009 Social URL.

  1. MissPinky

    MissPinky Shrinky Pinky!

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    Just a little rant to get something out of my head which is starting to bug me. There've been threads here about other people's 'bad attitude' to CD when they find out you're doing it. I was fortunate - I've had nothing but supportive comments from friends, family and colleagues thus far - and continue to get this from many.

    But now I've gone past a 3 stone loss (earlier this week - woo! :D) I've noticed a very subtle change in attitude - it's not in itself unsupportive, or even abusive... but it is starting to grate. It's along the lines of 'Very good, well done! - but you don't need to lose anymore, surely. You know, you should really stop now, you're just right as you are' [usually said in a parental tone of voice].

    Erm... are you my CDC? No. Are you my mom? No. My GP? No. Have you any idea what I should weigh or what my BMI should be? No. So why say that at all?!

    I fear that the next person who says this kind of thing to me will get the above response verbally, through both barrels! Grrr. It's mainly females, so I assume my diminishing frame is somehow threatening their own sense of security and self esteem. Isn't it weird how everyone's suddenly an expert when it comes to your diet, though...

    Rant over. Thankyou for listening.
     
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  3. eyeontheprize

    eyeontheprize can see the end in sight!

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    I agree, people have been telling me to stop for a while now. I ignore them, it's important to reach your goal, as I really want that sense of achievement and to lose this final stone or so. Don't worry about them, everyone who loses weight gets it. Congrats on your fab losses! X
     
  4. KD

    KD Gone fishing

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    People started telling me to stop dieting when I got to about 16 stone. Very amusing. Used to make me smile. Bless them for being silly ;)
     
  5. Yvonne1989

    Yvonne1989 Needs to stop eating!!

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    You know what it must definately be their own insecurites. They are feeling threatened by you. Its jealousy in its simplest form. Well done on the 3st loss so far. My sis is slim and sexy yet keeps saying she wants to loose 1st, I have about 4 to loose and she keeps saying I look fine and I dont need to diet yet she wants to try CD but says I shouldnt do it?!? I havent really told anyone im on CD as I dont think they need to know tbh!
     
  6. eyeontheprize

    eyeontheprize can see the end in sight!

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    it's defo other peoples insecurities coming out!
     
  7. Laura Croft

    Laura Croft Happily maintaining

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    No doubt there's some insecurity but I'm sure some people are genuine. They are saying that you look really good, and even though in our heads we still we are overweight, we aren't. Don't get me wrong - I had the same thing and wanted to lose more and it was frustrating but looking back, I really don't think everyone meant badly.
     
  8. merriefach

    merriefach peeling off the layers

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    People think I'm mad, but as I joined 4 of my staff also on CD I must employ the same sort of people as myself and soon we will outnumber the rest as more have joined us on CD in the last 2 weeks.
     
  9. MissPinky

    MissPinky Shrinky Pinky!

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    Thanks all, it's amazing the effect CD has on people - from jealousy to starting CD themselves.

    I'll absolutely keep going to my goal, because that's what will put me into the 'normal' weight range and a healthy BMI. But I'll probably end up with a big fat bottom lip from biting it hard next time anyone says such a thing! I hope that for some of the people who've said it, it isn't jealousy and is meant well.

    In the meantime I shall simply think, as KD says, 'bless them for being silly!' ;)

     
  10. curlywurly1234

    curlywurly1234 Cambridge Consultant

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    I so understand where your coming from!! People can be so weird sometimes..
    I get it all the time!! The best I have had recently is someone standing right in my personal space begging me to tell her what I weigh.. and surely I dont have any more to go!!! URGHHHHHHH !!!
    Sometimes I just say no Im nearly there!! I think people should worry more about themselves but some are scared your going to look better than them..thats the problem alot x
     
  11. MissPinky

    MissPinky Shrinky Pinky!

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    Unbelievable! Downright rude and blooming cheeky! Definately jealousy, as you've done so-o-o-o-o well! :)
     
  12. scamsterk

    scamsterk Member

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    I just read your thread and had to respond - I feel exactly the same! I've got a colleague who regularly checks with me that I'm not going to lose anymore, she's even said things like 'everyone's been commenting on it, saying you shouldn't lose anymore' !!!

    It's like you work your arse off to get slim (and believe me I'm still a healthy weight and could easily lose another stone if you listen to the ideal weight graphs, so not skinny by any means) and when you get there, rather than people building your confidence by complimenting you on how you look, they tell you you don't need to lose anymore!

    I do find it's starting to have a negative impact on me in eating situations and not sure if anyone else has found this when they get nearer their goal, but you feel more under pressure to eat something you don't want to, because it's like you don't have a right anymore to be careful about what you eat because you're slim?

    Have made a mental note after experiencing it this weekend that I will be strong and that if I want to stay slim, I need to be careful and have the right be careful and choosy about the type of food I put in my body.

    Grrr, sorry, rant over! :)
     
  13. babycake

    babycake Please kick my butt!!

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    tell them its none of their bees wax.
    I was plagued as a small child by my extended family telling me (+my mum) that i was a bag of bones. the side effect of this was being fattened up by all of them. "you can't leave the table until you've cleared your plate" adult size portions.
    now i'm very overweight. its crept up since i started high school (very unhappy) Those same family members are now persicuting me for being FAT!!! every family doo (even when i was 6 months pregnant) they make a point of telling me how big i am. cheeky c##ts.
    My point is that people feel the need to stick their nose in. i think its to make them feel happier and superior.
    stick your nose in the air and screw um.
    xoxox
     
  14. scamsterk

    scamsterk Member

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    Sounds like good advice! :)
     
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