New Year... New Start - onwards and downwards.
- Thread starter Caz
- Start date
MinnieMel
Why Be Normal?
Evening Caz --
Sorry if I offended you on Kally's thread. Art of my comments were tongue in cheek. But you really should read the article.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/a...hy-drank-5-bottles-wine-day-This-Morning.html
My dad is an alcoholic and as much as I love him -- I'd feel the same if he needed a transplant. I'd donate a lobe of my liver, but I'd be loath for him to bump some nurse who got hepatitis from a needle stick down the list. But, it's as someone said a "slippery slope" and I'm grateful I'm not making those decisions (rationing care).
Well done. How is Aaron's birthday count down going? Is he loving it?
No reason for you both to pay SW fees. Too bad he can't give you 1/2 his workout credit!
Sorry if I offended you on Kally's thread. Art of my comments were tongue in cheek. But you really should read the article.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/a...hy-drank-5-bottles-wine-day-This-Morning.html
My dad is an alcoholic and as much as I love him -- I'd feel the same if he needed a transplant. I'd donate a lobe of my liver, but I'd be loath for him to bump some nurse who got hepatitis from a needle stick down the list. But, it's as someone said a "slippery slope" and I'm grateful I'm not making those decisions (rationing care).
Well done. How is Aaron's birthday count down going? Is he loving it?
No reason for you both to pay SW fees. Too bad he can't give you 1/2 his workout credit!
Viva La Diva
A Brit living in the USA
Wow Caz, your holiday is around the corner !! Not long to wait now !!
Diva x
Diva x
Caz
Repeat Offender
Don't worry Mel, it's fine. I think when it's something that's quite personal it's easy to miss the sarcasm or humour in someone's voice let alone words on a page.
The other thing we've said is we're just not going to buy bad stuff and then it's not there to want to eat. I had a lot of chocolate I was given from children at school so we've been eating that for two weeks but if it wasn't there we probably wouldn't have wanted it.
Not long at all now Diva, eek! I feel really nervous about it though obviously excited too. Not sure why?!
Aaron's loving the presents Mel. We had a bit of a dud with the first one as it was a pair of Star Wars boxers but he's grown a little round the waist since I bought them! I bought medium which I didn't spot is only 32-34in waist and he's a 36 at his slimmest so he really liked them but was miffed that they don't and never will fit. I told him to try them on anyway as they seemed bigger to me and they were actually OK. One present was a pair of novelty glasses for holiday...
He liked them! He's had a few other bits like a head massager, flip flops, travel pillow for the plane and some miniature versions of his favourite hair styling stuff, shower gel and deodorant for holiday, which he was impressed that I knew they were his favourite. His final 'proper' present is a watch that I ordered online. I planned to get it engraved on the back of the watch face with 'To the moon and back' as that's how much we say we live each other (though he often changes it to mars/Pluto/end of the universe etc lol) - cheesy I know! The back of the watch face has the Police design logo on it though which is really annoying so engraving isn't an option anymore. It means the watch isn't quite the special/personal thing I wanted it to be but it's still a really nice watch.
The other thing we've said is we're just not going to buy bad stuff and then it's not there to want to eat. I had a lot of chocolate I was given from children at school so we've been eating that for two weeks but if it wasn't there we probably wouldn't have wanted it.
Not long at all now Diva, eek! I feel really nervous about it though obviously excited too. Not sure why?!
Aaron's loving the presents Mel. We had a bit of a dud with the first one as it was a pair of Star Wars boxers but he's grown a little round the waist since I bought them! I bought medium which I didn't spot is only 32-34in waist and he's a 36 at his slimmest so he really liked them but was miffed that they don't and never will fit. I told him to try them on anyway as they seemed bigger to me and they were actually OK. One present was a pair of novelty glasses for holiday...
He liked them! He's had a few other bits like a head massager, flip flops, travel pillow for the plane and some miniature versions of his favourite hair styling stuff, shower gel and deodorant for holiday, which he was impressed that I knew they were his favourite. His final 'proper' present is a watch that I ordered online. I planned to get it engraved on the back of the watch face with 'To the moon and back' as that's how much we say we live each other (though he often changes it to mars/Pluto/end of the universe etc lol) - cheesy I know! The back of the watch face has the Police design logo on it though which is really annoying so engraving isn't an option anymore. It means the watch isn't quite the special/personal thing I wanted it to be but it's still a really nice watch.
Squeezyweezy
Gold Member
MORNING MY LITTLE CHICKEN!!!!!!!
MinnieMel
Why Be Normal?
You will -- you're both young and settling into your careers, etc. My friend's daughter and her partner have been living together about a year. They're saving for a down payment on a property. Once they've bought, then they'll save for the wedding and honeymoon (but her father is wealthy and will probably help pay for the wedding). He just turned 30 and today was her 26th birthday. They're figuring in two or three years (before she's 30 they'll marry and start a family right away -- as they'll have been living together for sometime by then.)
Caz
Repeat Offender
Aaron isn't so keen on marriage though (though he'd seemed more open to it lately but apparently not!) and just isn't bothered by it and doesn't really see the point in it. He's 23 in August though and I'll be 27, guess that's one of the things about the age gap. Maybe in a few years his opinion will change, I don't know. Neither of our parents would really be able to afford to help pay for a wedding, not in any big way, so it would take quite a lot of saving on our part.
MinnieMel
Why Be Normal?
My DH was 28 when we got married. I think loads of guys don't even consider marrying until near 30. I think the first thing is to save to buy a place, and then next maybe a "destination" wedding.
Lots of people these days -- plan a destination wedding a couple of years in advance and their families and closest friends come along to the destination for the wedding -- then stay and have their holiday and the wedding couple move to a hotel, board a cruise, or whatever to have their honey moon.
My friend and her DH got married in Jamaica, they were all at the wedding hotel for about 3 days before the wedding -- then the bride and groom moved to another resort for 10 days, while the rest of the wedding party spent another four days holidaying together! It wad a win/win for everyone.
A friend of mine's son got married on Italy near Venice. They rented a big villa for all the family a d a few close friends. After the wedding everyone saw them off at the dock for their Eastern Med Cruise and then moved on to complete their own holiday plans. The bride and groom (with parental help) paid for the villa and food for the week -- everyone paid their own travel and incidental expenses. The groom paid for the cruise. They got a lot of money as wedding gifts - so. It help pay some of the costs.
If YOU want to get married - then "in time" you make it clear it needs to be "an option".
I, personally, would never have a child without being married. I know lots of children are born outside of marriage, but I feel it isn't as stable an option for the mother and child.
Caz
Repeat Offender
Ah we've had this conversation, he knows that for me marriage and at least one child (in that order) aren't negotiable, they're things I want from life and I'm not prepared to compromise on them because compromise means giving them up and I know that right now they're not things that he wants but that he's open to them, possibly, in the future. We come from very different families, I have 5 sisters, lots of nieces and nephews so big family and I'm very used to children. He has one brother and no contact with children, so to him children are scary things that he doesn't know how to deal with! lol I'd definitely want to get married before having children, it's just more secure and, I don't know, guess I'm traditional, just think it's the way that it's suppose to be. Nothing against people who do it in the other order or even without getting married, that's just how I'd want it to be.
We've had some really interesting chats around marriage where he's said about how he's thought that if he could afford it we were at the point of engagement, that if we got married he's want my sister (trainee vicar) to marry us, that he knows what ring he'd buy, said what kind of wedding he'd do if I sent him on Don't Tell The Bride and things like that but then when we've spoken about it recently he's gone back to his old opinion of he's not bothered about getting married, doesn't really see the point in it, expensive and a bit of paper etc. So God knows what he really thinks about it!
We wouldn't be able to do a destination wedding, my mum hasn't got a passport (though we're trying to sort it) and it's quite complicated for her to get one. My Dad also hates the heat so it wouldn't be able to be in a hot country, which is the kind of place I'd want if I was to do something like that.
We've had some really interesting chats around marriage where he's said about how he's thought that if he could afford it we were at the point of engagement, that if we got married he's want my sister (trainee vicar) to marry us, that he knows what ring he'd buy, said what kind of wedding he'd do if I sent him on Don't Tell The Bride and things like that but then when we've spoken about it recently he's gone back to his old opinion of he's not bothered about getting married, doesn't really see the point in it, expensive and a bit of paper etc. So God knows what he really thinks about it!
We wouldn't be able to do a destination wedding, my mum hasn't got a passport (though we're trying to sort it) and it's quite complicated for her to get one. My Dad also hates the heat so it wouldn't be able to be in a hot country, which is the kind of place I'd want if I was to do something like that.
Caz
Repeat Offender
Oh I know, believe me I'm in no rush. It's something I'd like further down the line and think (or maybe just hope!) that it's something he'd want too, when the time is right like you said.
It amazes me how much people spend on weddings these days. Like you said Trisha, they don't have to cost the earth and if I were to get married it definitely wouldn't. It's an important day and you'd want it to be nice but I would see it as a waste if it cost a lot, I'd rather spend the money on a house deposit or even a nice honeymoon. A few years ago I went to two weddings very close together, one cost 3,000 and the other 20,000. The more expensive one really was no nicer or more special than the cheaper one.
It amazes me how much people spend on weddings these days. Like you said Trisha, they don't have to cost the earth and if I were to get married it definitely wouldn't. It's an important day and you'd want it to be nice but I would see it as a waste if it cost a lot, I'd rather spend the money on a house deposit or even a nice honeymoon. A few years ago I went to two weddings very close together, one cost 3,000 and the other 20,000. The more expensive one really was no nicer or more special than the cheaper one.
I know, that's what my OH was saying but people had travelled for it and been so generous with presents and money that I just couldn't bear the idea of a paid bar. I told them to tell me if it came close to £1,000 and I think it was about 800 odd in the end. It really gave the reception a great party atmosphere and I felt much better about it. A lot of the guests noticed it and came up and thanked us for that, and the number of heartfelt thank you notes we got saying how they had a fantastic time, before I could even get my thank you cards out, made it so worth every penny. And considering there were 80 guests, people obviously didn't go too mad.
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