Thanks again girls, you've been so so good to me xx I had wrote a really long message a couple of days ago but when I hit submit it disappeared on me!!
I'm back on track diet wise and trying my best to be more positive with everything in general.
Just thinking that I havent properly posted or stuck around since almost this time last year!! I think thats probably why I've failed so miserably diet wise to be honest.
The reason I lost that 7 stone in 10 months, I'm convinced, is because of the support I received here and because I've never went to meetings, the accountablility of being here - of telling someone I'm messing about - and people who generally want to see me succeed with my weight because you all know how it feels.
I think my family/ friends/ OH get a bit fed up of me constantly on about my weight - its only weight - but they dont seem to understand what a big deal it is to me - my confidence, my mood - everythings effected by it.
Anyway, I've messed around for over a year now - ok, my weight hasnt got extremely out of hand - I've stuck to around the size 10 - 12 but have to admit a few of my 10's from last year dont close on me anymore - my weight has fluctuated up and down between the 11 to 12 stone mark

- my lightest ever being 10stone 10.
I hopped on the scales last Monday week and weighed in at 12 stone 1lb, to be honest, I know it sounds ridiculous but I burst out crying - I hate myself like this, I feel disgusting and avoid mirrors, but rather than wallow in my own self pity I did something about it - for the past year I manage a week on ww, fall off for 2 weeks, 3 days on etc.. but think I've finally got my "click" back ...
I weighed in this Monday (yesterday) at 11stone 10lbs so the good loss has spurred me on..
I've started taking the dogs for a 4 mile walk each evening and am actually beginning to enjoy it (although dont know how long it'll last - hate exercise!!) I'd never usually go on my own and would use it as an excuse if no one could join me but am enjoying the time to myself.
I would love to get down to 10st 5lbs... so fingers crossed, I have a night out in a couple of weeks and have ordered a little (backless! eek!) dress online so am waiting for that to come and want to look ok so at least theres a bit of incentive.
Feel so much better when I'm in control of my weight, makes me feel more in control of my life - if that even makes any sense.
Things have been crazy last few months and I've done some really stupid things, am trying to sort myself out once and for all and get back on track with everything.. suppose this is my starting point, so to speak...
Thanks for reading guys, hope your all well xxx