JanD
maintaining since June'09
To set the scene .......
I have a very good friend who lives locally - through us, our daughters (her 2 and my 1) met and eventually my daughter and her youngest became an 'item'.
A week last Sunday I found a txt on my phone that I'd missed from DH - sent sat night.
To cut a long story short she'd been at her girlfriend's and something had happened which meant she didn't want to stay there so she tried to come here (not far from the GF's) as she had had a few drinks so couldn't drive. We had gone to bed early and I've felt guilty ever since that I wasn't 'here' for her even though she could have rung the house phone or just come round and rung the bell.
But Anyway!! ......
She subsequently told me that the GF had 'done something' which she 'didn't want to get into' suffice to say she (DD) had been really upset by it and even though GF was mortified and profusely apologetic she was finding it hard to get back to where they'd been.
Since then I've asked a couple of times how they are and been told things were 'improving slowly'. I told DD that I was madly curious but totally understood if she didn't want to talk about it and she has chosen not to. I have asked about it a couple of times but haven't wanted 'how are things' to be interpreted as 'tell me tell me' iykwim!!
Anyhoo - tonight we went out for a meal with DD's GFs Mum and I now know that she knows all about it. When I asked her if she knew what had gone on she said 'yes but I don't think it would be right to tell you' ... Now I understand that completely ... we said when they got together that - whatever happens between them - we were friends first and we wouldn't let anything jeopardise our frienship. Okay - but I don't think I thought about a situation where we wouldn't share information.
ANYHOO ..... I want to say to DD - I'm feeling a bit daft and left out when everyone else knows what's gone on. I understand that she doesn't want me to feel badly about the GF - I understand that my friend doesn't want me to feel badly about her daughter but I feel a bit - well - 'on the outside' ..... I'd like to just be able to leave it and try to be happy that my opinion of people matters so much to them (not) but at the same time I feel a bit miffed that DD didn't want to confide in me - especially when her GF confided in HER Mum even though she was (from all I can gather and from what HAS been said) in the wrong.
:sigh:
This is probably daft - please feel free to tell me so xxxx
I have a very good friend who lives locally - through us, our daughters (her 2 and my 1) met and eventually my daughter and her youngest became an 'item'.
A week last Sunday I found a txt on my phone that I'd missed from DH - sent sat night.
To cut a long story short she'd been at her girlfriend's and something had happened which meant she didn't want to stay there so she tried to come here (not far from the GF's) as she had had a few drinks so couldn't drive. We had gone to bed early and I've felt guilty ever since that I wasn't 'here' for her even though she could have rung the house phone or just come round and rung the bell.
But Anyway!! ......
She subsequently told me that the GF had 'done something' which she 'didn't want to get into' suffice to say she (DD) had been really upset by it and even though GF was mortified and profusely apologetic she was finding it hard to get back to where they'd been.
Since then I've asked a couple of times how they are and been told things were 'improving slowly'. I told DD that I was madly curious but totally understood if she didn't want to talk about it and she has chosen not to. I have asked about it a couple of times but haven't wanted 'how are things' to be interpreted as 'tell me tell me' iykwim!!
Anyhoo - tonight we went out for a meal with DD's GFs Mum and I now know that she knows all about it. When I asked her if she knew what had gone on she said 'yes but I don't think it would be right to tell you' ... Now I understand that completely ... we said when they got together that - whatever happens between them - we were friends first and we wouldn't let anything jeopardise our frienship. Okay - but I don't think I thought about a situation where we wouldn't share information.
ANYHOO ..... I want to say to DD - I'm feeling a bit daft and left out when everyone else knows what's gone on. I understand that she doesn't want me to feel badly about the GF - I understand that my friend doesn't want me to feel badly about her daughter but I feel a bit - well - 'on the outside' ..... I'd like to just be able to leave it and try to be happy that my opinion of people matters so much to them (not) but at the same time I feel a bit miffed that DD didn't want to confide in me - especially when her GF confided in HER Mum even though she was (from all I can gather and from what HAS been said) in the wrong.
:sigh:
This is probably daft - please feel free to tell me so xxxx