QUEEN OF SELF SABOTAGE

[fatstitcher]

:wave_cry:HELP!!!. Why do I do it, I must be the Queen of Self Sabotage, I know I can follow the plan, I know the plan inside out, I offer everyone else advise on here and at group BUT I cannot stay on plan myself. I have over 8 stone to lose and I know that my weight is affecting my health etc. If I get on the scales on a Friday morning and they show a loss it is more my luck than by judgement.

Its not for the lack of planning as I sit and I plan out the week, meals and diaried events for the follwoing week, during wednesday and thursday so that I am fully prepared for Friday (my weeks start friday as that is weigh in day) but can guarantee that by Friday Lunchtime I have already strayed off plan...arghh...and once off plan that it for that day and then for some reason I then slip further and further off plan over the weekend.:break_diet:

The whole vicious circle is getting me down and is playing on my mind 24/7. I have the proof of the vicious circle that is I weigh now exactly the same as I weighed when I joined SW 3 yrs ago, I have lost I should think over this time nearly 4 stone but each time I lose weight I self sabotage and gradually the weight goes back on. The only saving grace is that if I wasn't a member of SW my weight would probably be much higher than it is now as I know my eating habits are out of control.


My fridge and cupboards are full of low/no syns foods and as I have said I know the plan inside out SO WHY CAN'T I STICK TO IT....any help would be gratefully received....:cry:

Thankyou in advance,

Michelle

 

[Lonestitcher]

Since you know the plan, that isn't something that needs looking at. What you need to focus on, is changing your habits, because at the moment it obviously isn't working for you. So, things to think about......

Do you think that you self sabotage because 8 stones seems like such an impossible number? That you think 'I'll never manage 8 stones. It seems so far away. I know that I'll probably fail.' So that you subconsciously self fulfil the 'failing' prophecy?

Why when you fall off plan on Friday lunchtime, do you decide 'that's it' for the rest of the day? Lunch is one meal out of 21. By continually thinking 'that's it', you really are sabotaging yourself.

Why do you think that you stray off plan on Friday at lunchtime? Do you have a breakfast? What do you have? What time do you WI on Friday? Do you always have the same 'off plan' lunch? Is it something to do with the mentality of 'anything after WI doesn't count'?

Why do you continue to be 'off plan' at the weekend, when you have already planned your meals? Is it to do with the different 'weekend routine'?

If you have lots of 'on plan' foods in the house, do you really need to plan your evening meals that far in advance? When I do a shop, I 'plan' what meats/veg to eat on certain nights. What I do with it, I make up on the day. Maybe by planning EXACTLY what you are going to have means that if on that day you don't fancy it, it's easier to go off plan?

What happens after the weekend that gets you back 'on plan'?

You say that each time you lose weight, you self sabotage and put it back on. Do you find that you start to self sabotage after losing the same amount? Is it to do with the fact, subconsciously, that you are scared of getting to target? Scared that if you lose the weight, you will lose 'yourself'?

Sorry that I seem to have asked more questions than I've given answers. I think that if you can answer some of them, you might find your 'triggers'. Apologies also if they got a bit deep and personal. I'm not expecting you to answer all of the questions on the board!!!!!

Hope that some of this might help!!!!

 

[sonya1980]

" Lunch is one meal out of 21. By continually thinking 'that's it', you really are sabotaging yourself."

That is a really good point - I must remember that!

 

[Meli]

If you have lots of 'on plan' foods in the house, do you really need to plan your evening meals that far in advance? When I do a shop, I 'plan' what meats/veg to eat on certain nights. What I do with it, I make up on the day. Maybe by planning EXACTLY what you are going to have means that if on that day you don't fancy it, it's easier to go off plan?

QUOTE]

Lonestitch- some really good points you raise
I used to plan my meals (and I know it does work for some), but for me as you say if I'm not in the mood for that then don't see any point in making it and may go off plan. So since my cabinets and fridge is always full of free/superfree red/green food and Healthy Extras I just take it meal by meal and see what I feel like having.

What is different on Friday lunch time, than any other day that is making you stray for the rest of the weekend? What foods/drinks are you filling up with at the weekends? Or is it that you just feel like binging?

 

[tinkerbellsmum]

hun it's like i could of wrote that post for u cause i'm extractly the same i know the plan inside out (which i think is my prob) and give advice to others but i can't seem to do a full week being good.
how about don't do anything this week but write down what u eat that you shouldn't the situation it accured in and why u think u did it. then we can see if we can find a reason and hopefully help u.
is it when u get to a simplar loss each time u sabbatage? every time i get to 2 stone off i start to fall of the wagon and give up i'm lost 2 stone aleast 4 times (i need to lose about 4.5)

 

[Mrs V]

Right...tough love time I think!!

When I started this plan, I was 21 stone 7. I am now 14 stone 4. I never, ever thought that I would have made it this far and even though I have another 4 stone odd to go before I get to target, I will get there.
Im not looking for a pat on the back, I just had to get a grip on myself and work at it....chest pains when you struggle to get out of bed, not being able to run after my Daughter and sweating like a mad thing in the summer helped make up my mind!
As another person posted..dont look at the "whole" amount that you have to loose, otherwise that will throw you off course as you can start thinking "whats the point". Take it a day at a time...yes, you plan, yes, you help on here, but at the end of the day, only YOU can do anything about it, so come on girl!
The problem I think with having a class on a Friday is that its the weekend the following day and the next Friday seems so far away! Are you able to change the day that you go to class? If not, then knuckle down and be tough on yourself!!

Sorry if I went on there, but you sound so much like me at the beginning of my journey that I just wanted to share my thoughts and experience with you.

xxx

 

[MrsSlimToBeSample]

I don't really have any advice (the others have already offered some great advice) as Im just the same, its like a mental block, like I just dont expect it to ever happenen, I cant envisage myself slim so its like im unconciously trying to do everything I can to stop it. Ive decided personally for me its all mind over matter, I have to stop my brain playing these tricks on me!!

I just wanted to give you these :hug99::hug99::hug99:

 

[Bellybegone]

I can relate to all you say, I seem to spend all of my life failing to tackle my weight which makes me so unhappy. Only trouble is I seem to tackle it for short periods 1 week or 2 and because I cant see any change I give up at the first bad day. I am rejoining a class tonight and hope with the support I can get on here this time will my turn and I will stop being my own worsed enemy.

 

[Avon]

When I started this plan, I was 21 stone 7. I am now 14 stone 4.
xxx

Just wanted to say wow! And Well done Best of luck with the rest of your journey

 

[Mrs V]

Thank you Avon, it hasnt been easy, but I just take each day as it comes!

 

[mumtheshopper]

I do think Friday way in is dangerous. Thursday is bad enough. But friday it's easy to enjoy the weekend, and friday is a long way off! You really just ahve got to get your head inside though. Losing weight, giving up smoking, all these things are just about finally getting your head right and wanting to do it.

Lynda

 

[evanesco]

I do this all the time. make plans, pin them up, shop for them etc, then bam, it's the weekend. I haven't got anything to offer because I'm still trying to figure out my own way of dealing with it, something which also isn't happening =(