Random comments

[jabbathehut]

I am, I suppose, really lucky that I have not really had anyone make any comment on my size within my earshot. This could possibly be due to me always getting in there first with my own 'witty' remark though.
For example, I was in the playpark with the kids the other week and someone passed by and asked how to get to the nearest NAAFI. My colleague couldn't remember where the closest one was but I told him exactly how to get there, then added at the end 'always ask the fat bird where to get food, it's a winner'. My colleague was horrified that I had put myself down in that way, but if I do it, then others can't hurt me by doing it, if that makes any kind of sense?

One thing that really did hurt me though, was when my aunt said to me 'You always were the prettiest one, it's such a shame when we look at you now'. I was so upset and had to leave the room immediately. I felt that it was a very tactless thing to say, I would NEVER dream of saying anything so hurtful to somebody.

What about you guys?

 

[debz32]

I am, I suppose, really lucky that I have not really had anyone make any comment on my size within my earshot. This could possibly be due to me always getting in there first with my own 'witty' remark though.
For example, I was in the playpark with the kids the other week and someone passed by and asked how to get to the nearest NAAFI. My colleague couldn't remember where the closest one was but I told him exactly how to get there, then added at the end 'always ask the fat bird where to get food, it's a winner'. My colleague was horrified that I had put myself down in that way, but if I do it, then others can't hurt me by doing it, if that makes any kind of sense?

One thing that really did hurt me though, was when my aunt said to me 'You always were the prettiest one, it's such a shame when we look at you now'. I was so upset and had to leave the room immediately. I felt that it was a very tactless thing to say, I would NEVER dream of saying anything so hurtful to somebody.

What about you guys?

how rude of your aunt....

People always called me 'Big Debz'.... or 'Big Girl'....which really upset me - although I always laughed it off

and, like you, I always got in first with a witty remark....before they did with something hurtful....

Debz xx

 

[Angel155]

I usually make a witty "Fat bird" comment.

 

[jabbathehut]

The thing that I find distressing is that people seem to think you are somehow, I dunno, less worthy, if you put on some weight. As if their comments won't hurt you cos it's just the truth. And how people say things like 'such a pretty face' or 'the big one' when describing someone.
I think Dawn French is a stunning looking woman, and actually looks better (IMO) now she's bigger then she ever did when she was 'thin'. She is kind of like my role model (is that sad to have a role model at 30!?)

 

[kellymundy]

I remember talking to my mum while getting ready for my cousins wedding telling her I'd lost 1 1/2 st. She was really supportive and told me how well I was doing only for my nan to pipe up from behind my mum to say:
"well if you've lost 1 1/2 st and you still look like that I hate to think what you looked like before".

 

[Angel155]

That is just plain evil Kelly. I wish people would realise how damaging a flippant comment like that can be

 

[debz32]

The thing that I find distressing is that people seem to think you are somehow, I dunno, less worthy, if you put on some weight. As if their comments won't hurt you cos it's just the truth. And how people say things like 'such a pretty face' or 'the big one' when describing someone.
I think Dawn French is a stunning looking woman, and actually looks better (IMO) now she's bigger then she ever did when she was 'thin'. She is kind of like my role model (is that sad to have a role model at 30!?)

know what you mean...it's like they feel they have the right to say whatever...as if you have no feelings....

Dawn French is a fantastic role model... do you think she's REALLY happy being 'big' ????

Debz xx

 

[Boo]

I always get the comment ' beautiful face, if only you were slimmer you'd have them falling at your feet'!!!!

That always made me feel totally humongous!!

 

[Angel155]

Dawn French is a fantastic role model... do you think she's REALLY happy being 'big' ????

Debz xx

Good point, Fern Britton used to always come across as if she was happy being big. She then went and had surgery

 

[debz32]

I remember talking to my mum while getting ready for my cousins wedding telling her I'd lost 1 1/2 st. She was really supportive and told me how well I was doing only for my nan to pipe up from my behind my mum to say:
"well if you've lost 1 1/2 st and you still look like that I hate to think what you looked like before".

how very very rude....sometimes I think older people revert to almost childlike behaviour (I know my gran - 89 - does)...they say exactly what they think (like a smal child would) and dont consider how they might make others feel (like a small child)

my gran always comes off with some very blatant comment when we're out - and ALWAYS in a very loud voice

Debz x

 

[Minz]

You're right Debz - I think as people age (or if they're related to you) they can say what they like. Older people (maybe because they're hard of hearing) don't have the same volume control as younger people, so think they're saying something quiet, but they're not. You have to just laugh it off......can be quite funny at times.

 

[sumayyah]

one that gets me is how you should be greatful for any male attention just cos ur big

when in belfast was asked which i would sleep with 50 year old, camp as the come or bloke in his 60's and both were standin there waitin for me to answer. when i said neither are my type acctually was as thou i should have been delighted at the attention

 

[Minz]

Unbelievable!

 

[debz32]

one that gets me is how you should be greatful for any male attention just cos ur big

when in belfast was asked which i would sleep with 50 year old, camp as the come or bloke in his 60's and both were standin there waitin for me to answer. when i said neither are my type acctually was as thou i should have been delighted at the attention

unbelievable

where do people get off....????

Debz x

 

[sumayyah]

debz well uve seen the 60 year old ( blue people carrier ) as if i was gonna jump for joy at the prospect

 

[melliepigpog]

I hate it when the description is accompanied by gestures...so someone might say 'the big girl' at the same time as puffing out their face and extending their arms out showing a big body...i mean what's that all about??? Or when someone makes a comment about someones weight and immediately look a me and say 'sorry Mel' like its ok to make the comment as long as they acknowledge my feelings at the same time! Normally men to be honest....

 

[shell]

if you put yourself down enough in public people follow suit.....coz they think you are ok with it...you should challenge anyone who passes comment at you family or not.....i certainky wouldnt take it from anyone least of all my family....!!!!

 

[jennikay]

My mum used to say to me 'at your age I played hockey twice a week and...' etc.
My dad used to say 'you're getting a bit porky!'

Though funnily, my dad is completely behind me doing this diet, compliments me on how much better I'm looking etc, and my mum just tempts me with food!

 

[karenO]

I remember finding out that the guys in a place i used to work had nicknames for all us ladies. It was a daft & trivial thing but i was gutted to find out that all the girls had pretty flattering nicknames and mine? Yep "The Big Girl".

Annoyingly i was a size 14/16 at that time so not exactly that big at all :sigh: