Refreshed and restarting

Hi Lottie ... I can't even tell you know much I relate to your opening post. :( I can't say I've gone through intense meddling (which is probably the root of the problem) from your parents at such an early age, but I too, have always been a fat kid. My parents and grandparents would always point this out (but never in a mean way I guess).

At age 14 I was a size 22/24 which was extremely unpleasant and for the longest time, I never saw my size. I hear what you're saying about binge eating... and I do at this point have to warn you, that a VLCD can, in some instances, trigger this too.

I'd always been a secret eater, emotional eater to comfort myself etc... but, then I went on Lighter Life in 2008, which triggered after about a year and a half, an intense fear of food and having control. So reverse binge eating if you know what I mean... soothing myself by punishment and food restriction. Then it backfired and all I could do was eat, eat, eat and I thought I'd die if I stopped eating at any point in the day. A panic of NOT having a food crutch.

I see you've had some therapy and you have moved out of the city which you associate with all this messy past. These are all good things. Continuing with self-CBT is probably going to help you, to write down things in this diary, how you feel and what triggers you are finding. Mine's stress/anxiety and boredom (usually anyway). Maybe you don't like feeling deprived of what you like to have as well? (I used to get binges stemming from "deprivation" of bread - but I've resolved those now :D).

I really hope I haven't put you off SnS. This is actually a good diet because it's a real step back away from food, away from having to make ANY decisions and it really highlights what situations and emotions are the triggers. It's an evaluation tool more than a diet.

I wish you all the best on Monday!! We're all in this together!

:bighug:
 
There's no harm in trying it and if you think it would work for you then you might as well give it a go :)

I agree, we might regret someday why we don't even bother trying certain thing. but before we will try, we should evaluate it first, if we think it would work great and can give good result, that would be better.

We know what could be good and bad for us most of the time, what we can at least do is to do the right decision.
 
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