sanity!!!!

i hate smelling food!!!! x x
 
oh, tell me about it. i have to cook the kids and hubby's tea. :( can't wait until i can eat again. i remember last time everything tastes so much nicer and has more taste than before. even the 810 meals!
 
im finding this week really hard cant stop thinking about food its like its taking over...but on a positive note im obsessing about how chicken salad and stirfry will taste etc however a bacon sandwich has bever seemed so appealing...even hough the ones in my school canteen are horrible!!

you must remember this feeling because hayley you never want to experience it again!!

i JUST WANT TO GET TO MY GOAL WEIGHT IN LESS THAN 12 WEEKS NOW...THAT WAY I CAN EAT SOON!


can not weight until im on 1 meal a day!!


ahhhhhhhhh!

im grumpy!! im snappy and im harasing my mum all evening for support as these are the worst hours!! between about 5 and 8! really hard!! thank god i keep a pack back unitl then!!

please someone inspire me and tell me this gets easier!

on a bright note someone has commented that ive lost weight! i know i have but i dont think its noticeable yet!! but clearly something is going well!!

x x x x:cry::cry::cry::cry::cry:
 
i love bio oil!! makes me feel good about myself and i feel like i am seeing changes!! can not wait till the changes become more predominant though!!

i would however give up my bed for a month to get over cravings!!!
 
having a really good day...feeling really positive..happy and good about myself!! have lots of energy and am looking forward to the next few weeks however am worried though ladies.

i am going away on a conference with school 2 weeks monday its a lovely hotel in birmingham and they have booked dinner for us!! ahaaahhhhhhhhh!! i dont want to eat!! mum said to eat a small bit of chicken and lettuce and not to have my last food pack!! but i really dont want to!! she is on lighter life an still managed to loose 5ibs the week she cheated with fish and lettuce at a meal out!! and theres a breakfast! but im going to for go that for a swim!!

just dont know what to do about the dinner!! theres only three of us so its going to be painfully obvious!! and if we have a big sit down lunch!!

am worried!! help!!

x x x xx
 
ok so got through another wknd however have noticed im arguing loads more with my partener...its awful!! last week i was in an awful mood in the evenings...discovered ive been having too much bouilon. he is trying to be supportive but he is failing!

and then i snap and dont let it drop because everything is 30 times worse at the moment!! like just now i had my shake so i said i would make his sandwiches as i dont want to watch him eat his pizza.!! no no babe il do it he says!! he just didnt get it!! and now we have had an argument over it!!!! ggggggrrrrrrrr

has anyone else experienced terrible mood swings??

i resisted an indian last night even though my drunk father was tryin to insist upon it!! i met a my sister cdc as she was going for the first time and was nervous!! she was lovely and told me lots i didnt know i.e. too much boulion...and that maybe why im finding the second week so hard!!!


is being thin going to cost me my long term relationship?? god i hope not! but i have been awful!! i dread to think what its going to be like once TOTM kicks in aswel!! il probably draw blood!!

please guys need some advice here x x x x
 
it sounds like you are having a really tough time. it will get easier as you get on. tell your partner straight how you feel and what you are going through. tell him it's hard to see him eat these things and you desperately need his support. it's that or you leave the room while he eats.

i'm not so bad. hubby can eat whatever he wants in front of me except my fav crisps.

i think that you need a distraction like a new hobby.

just asked hubby if i got any mood swings when i started my diet and he has just nodded his head. so as for mood swings it looks like yes!

bullion is just 1 tsp a day. you can have that OR the water flavouring but not both. why not drop the bullion and have a jelly made from the water flavouring and the mix a mousse. it was a godsend last time.

things get better. honest just ride it out.
 
thank you!! ive been much better today and had my second weigh in so im up to a stone off in 2 weeks!! yay!! that will keep my going!! ive cut the boulion out altogether and so that should mean a marked improvement!!

im also going to a pilates class tonight which im excited about!! determined to get this weight off, and hopefully all of it in 7 more weeks, totalling 9!! well tahst my aim anyway!!

thank you everyone you really are a lifeline!! x x x x
 
Well its thursday of week three so midway!! so far its been a good week!!

my mood has increased no end!! im a much happier person to be around!!(i hope!! and im not as bothered as i was around food!!

my deoartment are bringing cream cakes in etc...and i didnt really abt an eyelid!! people eating curries, baco sandwiches and wraps!! mmmm wraps in front of me!! but u have resisted and still (thankfully) have not fallen off the wagon!

my boyfriend is tucking into home made burgers salad and hashbrowns infornt of e as i type!! it smella amazing!! but the short term pleasure i would recieve fomr eating this would never, ever compensate for my guilt or the weight id put back on!! or the £40 id of blown by not sticking to CD!!

Went to the cinema kast night to watch leap year!! was a really good film...feel good, completely predictable but made me smile. when we arrived i was feeling slightly sorry for myself as i was lookinga t all the popcorn/chocolate/nachos on display!!

but...i sat in my seat and had my first ever bar!! i opted for the peanut crunch!! i really enojyed it and savoured it!! my boyfriend bought me a fresh black coffe which was lovely and i had my bar in two sittings!!

what really got me through it though was watching the advert for the new sex and the city flm. seeing those women looking incredible in whatever tehur wearing just inspired me and made me thankful that i have made a positive change to my life!!

people have also started noticing...collegues have been commenting on how muchmore flat my stomach is!! which is lovely!! keep sme going you know!!

i only ahve towo more bars, chocolate orange!! which i think will probably turn out to be a big mistake...and toffee. i dont however feel like ive lost any weight at all this week which is slightly concerning :( id hate to think i havent lost anything this week!

i also joined a pilaties class this week! was lovely to be doing something active and know that it will hopefull make a difference to my end appearance!

have also paid for all of my trip to america!! so i defo have to get looking gorgeous soon as theres beaches to be visiting and i want to strut my stuff in new york in a fabulous dress and a pair of shoes!! hehe!!

i hope your all doing really well!!

just remember hayley you do NOT want to be a big fat mess anymore!!

x x x x
 
Hello there

sounds as though you are doing really really well. I'm into week 4 now and like you am finding it easier and easier to stick to. The further I get into it the more I know I am seeing this through until I get to where I want to be.

We have the opportunity to go out this weekend (doesn't happen often with 3 kids under 3 and no family near by to help out :)) but I just don't want to.....whats the point when I can't eat or drink. We might go to the cinema, haven't been for at least 3 years!

I know how you feel on the weight loss front, my week 3 loss was only 2lbs and at the time I thought 2 measly pounds after not eating/drinking all week and I have to admit I was disappointed. But on reflection it is 2lbs off and 2lbs nearer my goal, plus at this stage it has got to be pure fat thats going now.....:D

Good luck for your next weigh in, will look out to see how you do xx
 
well im very excited...have a new hair do!! well iv bad a trim and my hais is one shade darker of blonde but i love it!! feeling fabulous!! even managed to cook my boyfriend lunch and not ket it bother me!! cant actually believe it!!

have lots to look forward to as im re decorating the front room and have been looking at lots of very expensive stripy acrpets to put into my front room! tehir gorgeous!! am however slightly concerned as to how im going to pay for all this and america!! eek!

but not eatig or buying anything new or drinking is keeping from spending money aimlessly and allowing me to save.

im decorating my boyfriends mums bedroom for her tomorrow aswell for a mothers day surprise. my mum is 240 miles away and ive already given her a present so this is somthing form us!! i have laura ashley wallpaper and curtains in pale gren to put up, and three walls to paint! only somthing small but she doesnt earn much money and i think it would be a lovely surprise for her!! i also figure that being busy all day will keep me frrm thinking about food!!

i still dont feel like iv lost any weight this week but my size 12 skinny jeans are fitting perfectly now with no overhang!! yay!!

that is a bonus!!

nothing tastes as good as feeling thin feels!! haha!!

happy glugging ladies

x x x x
 
having a brilliant week so far, its wendesday and have been to the cinema. for the first time i have tried the cranberry crunch bar!! oh my god!! its amazing! actually loved it!! had it with a black coffee and a bottle of water

work is going well as im not frustrated about food as much as i used to be and im finding this week that im having my first pac(good old porridge) at around half 1...which is when my colleagues eat lunch and it also keeps me going for longer.

i ahve also discovered that once my BMI reaches 26 its a good idea to move up to ss+ as its a good stepping stone. KD said so and form what i can gather she is the guru of CD so imguessing her advice is like the bible of this diet!! haha!

feeling good about myself. have started some mild exercise routines and have fdone them three times this week. i spend 15-20 mins working my arms ...punching the air in a way so that it works out my core muscles aswel.

TOTm arrived today and so far i do feel slightly more bloated than usual, however im not going to let that faze my weight loss.

my sister is starting cd on friday which is brilliant and her and my mother and father are coming to stay over wknd. with mum being on ll we will all be able to keep each other going!! hehe

major mile stone met today aswel in the fact that i cooked gav's dinner for him. i made a lovely pasta and healthy sauce for his packed lunch tomorrow, and burgers with chessy creamy mushroom sauce with chips from the chippy. i didnt falter once and didnt even taste the food let alone try a chip!! wahooo!!

hayley you can do this! it literally is mind of matter! and im feeling mildly confident that my attitude towards food is changing slowly in a positive way
or at least i hope so...

im considering taking an underwear photo diary of my weight loss...something to look back at. shame i didnt start from the beginning. i have some snaps on my phone but think that proper pics will be more compelling when i look at them!!

hope everyone is well!

x x x
 
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