so upset

Discussion in 'Slimming World Off Topic' started by Janine 40, 22 October 2010 Social URL.

  1. Janine 40

    Janine 40 Full Member

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    I am so so upset, i can't say why as it is too painful and awkward to write, it all boils down to my mum and her lack of interest in me and how she is so quick to judge when she gave me so little as a child and now here in adulthood she is the same, (those pursed lips say it all) how can a mother be so mean??

    Thanks for listening guys, love you all.

    xxx
     
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  3. jigglymum

    jigglymum Full Member

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    big squishy huggles xxx
     
  4. Janine 40

    Janine 40 Full Member

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    Thank you both of you,it means so much.xxx
     
  5. IreneH

    IreneH Gold Member

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    Big hugs to you.

    Have you tried talking to her about it?
    Irene xx
     
  6. *honey

    *honey Silver Member

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    Big *hugs*
    I'm sorry your mum treats you like that. I'm affraid i have seen the other side of life where parents arent the loving, caring people you think of when you think of mum/dads. ( not me personally) but many of my friend have come from mean parents/families.

    Im sorry she has made you feel so so upset.
     
  7. Janine 40

    Janine 40 Full Member

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    Irene

    o how i would it to work like that with my mum!! How do i talk about sexual abuse at the age of 2 and 8, being in care, i won't elaborate more because she put me in those places and she will never admit its why i have so many struggles. Its just a bad day because i saw her yesterday and she never even offered me a cup of tea!!

    Sorry if that sounds heavy,i don't look for sympathy, it just wrecks my head when i see her and still she shows me so little love or time. On paper and to her friends i am the best thing since sliced bread as i have letters after my name.

    Much love.


    J. xxx
     
  8. Janine 40

    Janine 40 Full Member

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    o guys, i do not want to put a downer on yr day, i am generally happy go lucky, it is just when i see my mum!! Sometimes the truth hurts and i feel sorry for her as she does not know how to love me.

    R thank you for all your concern, do not mean to bring you all down.

    xx Big love and kiss. xxx
     
  9. Gettingthinnerbytheday

    Gettingthinnerbytheday Gold Member

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    Gosh honey you sound like you need one of the worlds biggest hugs right now! ((((((Hugs))))))

    I am so sorry that you are treated like this, nobody & I mean nobody deserves to go through that, never mind the repercussions later that it has impact on.

    I hope that you are alright, if you do need to offload, then we're here for you & please don't worry you will put us in a downer. x x
     
  10. IreneH

    IreneH Gold Member

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    Have you had any counselling about what happened to you? It might help

    Irene xx
     
  11. Janine 40

    Janine 40 Full Member

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    till it comes out of my ears, practice CBT, but nothing is as harsh as seeing her and knowing the front she puts on and why oh why would she have a front when i leave such a bad taste in her mouth. I am ok until i see her then it is all downhill. She looks at me like i am a bad taste in her mouth!!

    I think its hard cos i look at my relationship with my little 14 yr old, she is 5.1 and hates it but we laugh about it and go shopping to suit her little height!!

    U all know i am feeling better now with you lot and your support and you have brought a little smile to my face, thank you ALL SO MUCH.

    Big kiss.

    J. xx
     
  12. IreneH

    IreneH Gold Member

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    So pleased to hear of the good relationship with your 14 year old.

    Glad you are feeling better

    Irene xx
     
  13. clairex

    clairex Silver Member

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    i know i am a bit late but im sending hugs too! xxxx
     
  14. Janine 40

    Janine 40 Full Member

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    so many thank yous and good wishes.lots of love to you all and a BIG MASSIVE< ALL MY LOVE> XXX

    Your friend Janine. xx

    Thank you so much. xxx
     
  15. fillymum

    fillymum synful soul

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    You poor love.

    Thank goodness your own bad experiences have not affected your relationship with your daughter. You must be a fantastic mum. Your daughter must love you to bits and pieces.

    Hugs from me too,

    hugs and love xxxxxxxxxx
     
  16. avisk

    avisk xx

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    Do you have to see her? Wouldn't life be so much easier for you if you didn't?
     
  17. valerie11

    valerie11 Gold Member

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    hi janine sorry to hear about how ur mum treats u x i was very lucky to have a very loving mum and dad perhaps it's in ur best interest not to see her just concentrate on ur own family (sorry thats probably easier said then done) ur mum's going to be the one that loses out. what about ur dad do u see him, how is ur mum with ur daughter? perhaps she doesn't know how to show love, i hope you can stay strong thro this and just know we r all here for you xx
     
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  19. *honey

    *honey Silver Member

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    Thanks.

    I am affraid there are way too many people in my life who have been SA as children and R****d as adults. ( have starred it out, habit from posting on SA forums)
    The reality of this world is that many many more people are survivors of SA than you ever think. 1 in 3 women is the statistic.

    related forums if this has brought it up for anyone
    Pandora's Aquarium - an online support group for rape and sexual abuse survivors for survivors
    The Supporters Sanctuary forum The Supporters sanctuary for friends and family

    Im sorry for what you went through Janine, remember it wasn't your fault.
    I'm with Avisk, dont see her...... but i know its not always that simple is it.

    Feel free to PM me if you need a chat.

    x x
     
  20. Kater-tater

    Kater-tater Gold Member

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    Oi you!
    *does massive run up and bear hug*
    I have no idea what to say but you are a lovely lady and im very inspired and impressed with how you are and how despite everything that seems to have happened to you, you have become such a lovely person.
    Always here x
    katie
     
  21. ilovelife

    ilovelife Wishing and hoping!

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    You are not alone, I have a crap relationship with both parents - so much so that I have ended contact as at the end of the day they are just people. You put meaning on to what is important, it can be hard as parental attachment is a big influence in other relationships. but remember you have your own family with your daughter and by the sounds of it an excellent relationship. Big hugs I know it may sound cold but it is only an opinion which is purly subjective you have choices in what you want to belief in x
     
  22. Janine 40

    Janine 40 Full Member

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    Thank you

    Such lovely kind words from all of you who don't know me from Adam yet have the time to care.

    I will take on board all that you lot have said and i will remember the advice given. As far as seeing her goes, i go because i love to see my dad and i know he has no life with her, she "polices" his wine and cigarettes!!!

    But hey ho you are all right, i have a beautiful daughter and son, i have the most wonderful husband, the best mother in law that a girl could wish for and a Guinea Pig called Stitch (big grin). I have such a lot to be thankful for.

    Thank you all of you for your kindness, today will be a good day!!

    Much love and hugs.

    Janine. xxx :D
     
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