Sue's 2010 diary


I am one of the 63336
S: 20st3lb C: 20st3lb G: 12st7lb BMI: 44.3 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
OK, new year - new diary.

I know I need to work out what the triggers are that make me want to munch. The big obvious one is stress.

What stresses me?

Firstly, PMT time just about everything. Need to be aware of dates BUT my body is playing tricks on me now (menopause looming I guess!!).

Secondly, my son. Not very often and I know it's just him being an 11 year old boy but it is a struggle at times.

Lastly, the BFH - my OH's wife. Can't say ex-wife as they aren't divorced yet (separated 7 months before we met) but fingers crossed they will be by the end of this year.

They have 2 daughters together (14 & 6) and she uses them as much as she can to make life difficult for us. It souonds terrible to say it but the girls (especially the older one) has seen how the mother got her own way by treating my OH like dirt and has an attitude along those lines herself. She is a nice girl 90% of the time but the rest of the time she needs putting right as she can be very rude and VERY VERY selfish.

Unfortunately it will never change as the mother has had her under her wing for too long. My OH has always worked very long hours so mother has had carte blanche with the girls. They are forever off school 'ill' (so much so educational welfare are involved). The girls have not had dentist or optician appointments in years. Mother is more interested in chatting online than looking after the girls. Last summer holiday she took the 6 year old to the park/beach about 4 times - bearing in mind they live opposite a park and 2 minutes walk from the beach.

Mother keeps 'forgetting' when the children are due to come round for tea. She puts it in their heads that they don't want to come and stay. Sometimes the 6 year old isn't allowed to stay if the 14 year old doesn't want to, other times she is.

We often find out changes at the very last minute or as my OH picks up the 6 year old mother will tell her she doesn't have to stay if she doesn't want to so she changes her mind mid-evening.

14 year old doesn't want to stay often as mother lets her stay on the computer until 1am of a weekend AND watch 18 films which we won't allow.

Through all this my 11 year old just poodles along taking all the changes on the chin, very rarely complaining.

So, it can be VERY stressful and makes me crave chocolate.

So for this year I need to learn coping strategies!
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I am one of the 63336
S: 20st3lb C: 20st3lb G: 12st7lb BMI: 44.3 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
Really really pee'd off and BFH is STILL the cause.

Christmas is out the way and money is tight. OH has the offer of overtime on Thursday or Friday - his days off this week. He has had to turn it down as the girls are meant to be staying Thursday night. BUT they may well not stay if BFH has her bl***y minded head on. BUT even if they don't stay then OH will be expected to take youngest to school. BUT then again she may decide to take her herself.

So we potentially lose money because BFH is such a (can't say the word) yet OH won't put his foot down with her. OK, I DO understand and sympathise that she uses the girls to get at him but what about OUR life.

Need chocolate!


I am one of the 63336
S: 20st3lb C: 20st3lb G: 12st7lb BMI: 44.3 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
Hmmm, that woman is absolute nuts. Girls round for tea last night. OH picked them up at 5pm. Youngest is in thick top (we bought her for Christmas), leggings and ....... wait for it ........ silver ballet-type shoes. In this weather????

Served dinner and youngest (6) turned her nose up at it as she 'wasn't in the mood' for what I had made - bearing in mind it's exactly what she keeps asking for! OH lost his temper with her so I got him to 'back off' but did say I wasn't making anything else at which she burst out crying.

Have to admit I'm more than happy they've opted to not stay on Thursday night! Still having to bite my lip though as OH has the offer of overtime on Friday but he can't do it as BFH will still expect him to take youngest to school and he'll do it rather than have her kick up a stink. I BET though she'll keep the girl off school sick on Friday as God-forbid the girl will do a whole week at school!!

Right, rant over. Onwards and downwards. We WILL get back on track!


I am one of the 63336
S: 20st3lb C: 20st3lb G: 12st7lb BMI: 44.3 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
I've had chocolate, all because of BFH.

She rung OH (a lorry driver) earlier to say she is worried about picking youngest up from school so can he do it. The school is a 10 minute bus ride away, the bus stop is 2 minutes walk away.

He can't do it. He is at work and he can't just drop everything. He could be anywhere at 3pm plus work won't go for that!

She is now all stroppy so sod's law the children will get used against him.

He made a comment to me about she'll catch on eventually that he isn't going to jump everytime he says and that it'll be ok as long as it doesn't affect us - but it DOES affect us. Everytime they're over or due round or mother has a cob on it affects us. The children are 300 times harder work than my son because they've been allowed to grow up how they are



I am one of the 63336
S: 20st3lb C: 20st3lb G: 12st7lb BMI: 44.3 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
Forgot to add. She sits on her a**e all day chatting to people (ie men) on the computer so can't she just leave early or, heaven forbid, walk???


I am one of the 63336
S: 20st3lb C: 20st3lb G: 12st7lb BMI: 44.3 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
Good start to day. Slow start to day! School snowed off so lad at home.

Had WW sausage & bacon sarnie so had 2.5 syns & HeB.

Having spag bol (turkey mince) for dinner so just to work out lunch.

Got skids round later. PITA as they don't eat the food we do so have to get 'special' stuff in! I BET BFH will call mid-morning to say OH can have them before lunch which will mean trying to sort out TWO meals for them!


I am one of the 63336
S: 20st3lb C: 20st3lb G: 12st7lb BMI: 44.3 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
NOT a happy bunny.

Have worked out that if I get that job, money will be so much better and we'll be able to save up for a nice holiday. With that in mind we picked up a few holiday brochures as I know what I like but my OH has never been abroad.

I mentioned in passing that I'd love to take my son to DisneyWorld in Florida some time. My OH said that it would probably be best if I took my son on my own as it would cause aggro with his ex and comments about us taking my son away & spending money on him etc.

Firstly, I did actually mean we could offer to take his children too (although the youngest would probably not go as for some reason she reckons the sun shines out mothers a**e - she'll learn! Don't know about the eldest).

Secondly, I'm getting pig-sick of everything revolving around whether that selfish, poisonous BFH is going to make spiteful comments. I KNOW she makes them to the children, but the younger one comes and asks us questions and makes her own mind up. The eldest believes whatever she can get the most mileage out of!

I have a horible feeling my OH is considering buying me an engagement ring for my birthday - and it is going to cause a mega-row when I say 'no'. Not while 'she' has such control over my OH's life.

As I've said before - they separated in August 2008 (physically, mentally years before) and we got together in March 2009 so she HAS to accept things are NOT her business!!


Gold Member
S: 14st13lb C: 14st13lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 38.2 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
sounds like its a really stressful time ..(if not all the time)..

Your coping very well though, and aslong as you have us to moan too.. hopefully your chocolate indulgences will be limited?

(hugs your way)