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The greedy child

#1
The Greedy Child

This is a voyage of discovery for me and to make admissions about myself is painful, embarrassing but liberating.
I was always a greedy child. Whatever I had, food or otherwise was never enough. At as young as eight, I would steal food from the kitchen and eat it in my room. This was the last thing I needed to do as there was no shortage of food in our house. Mum and Dad worked very hard and were reasonably comfortable. Looking back I think that they unknowingly substituted their time with food and treats. There was no family holidays till I was eleven years old. I have no memories of being taken away for the day or having any fun with my parents. I spent a lot of time with my Gran and a childminder. As I write this I am having conflicting thoughts. On the one hand I feel that I am betraying my parents but on the other I feel sad at what I see as pretty much a childhood lost. But there was always food....
Around the time my sister was born I remember with absolute horror that I had been stealing food and taking it upstairs as I previously mentioned. I hid the dirty bowl(it had angel delight in it)in the bedroom cupboard. I don’t remember how much time passed but one morning I woke up and on my bedroom window was literally hundreds of bluebottles and they were coming from the cupboard. They had bred on the food debris I had hidden.
Everything seems to be a compulsion with me. Nothing ever seems to be enough and I have to have self gratification constantly. If I want something I need to have it immediately, tomorrow will be too late. This realisation about myself and being able to admit it will set me free.
Right now I am in limbo. I have lost seven stones (three of them five years ago, four of them this year) and have another four to lose. I have maintained my current weight of around 230 lbs for the past three months and now I’m ready (after a few false starts) to begin the final phase of my journey.
Hope you come along for the ride!
 
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#2
Welcome to the forum x

It`s great that you have now discovered where your issues lie so that you can deal with them and move on. Do you think counselling would help? Or do you not think you would need it now?

Well done on your fab weight loss so far

Xxx
 

Blingbabe

Back On Track!
#3
Good Luck with whatever plan you choose for the remainder of your weight loss.

I was also a greedy child and stole food from the kitchen - I am sure that there are a fair few of us that can relate to elements of your lifestory.

It is very good that you have thought carefully about the factors that have contributed to your weight gain - I believe that this kind of self-awareness and personal honesty will help you to succeed in your weight loss goals.

All the best of luck x
 
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