The Road To Vegas

Grrrr stupid computer!! I had done a massive post and computer died so have had to use my phone now. Im not typing all that again. Basically i have a cold and as a result am feeling sorry for myself. I dont feel up to exercise but feel bad if i dont do any!! I feel like im doing so well and working so hard with diet and exercise but get frustrated sometimes about how long it takes to get where i wanna be and how hard i have to work to get there!! I know i have just under four months to look fab for vegas but i want it all now!!!

Am going to crawl under a blanket now and spend rest of today feeling sorry for myself. Only good thing in all this is in not craving stodge yet!!
 
God today i really am feeling sorry for myself! Ive realised ive been going to class for the last six weeks and im gutted ive only lost five pounds and i dont feel like ive lost anything either. I dont feel any different in my body.

I dont know why im feeling like this cos ive been doing really well sticking to plan and sticking with my exercise. Its not like im feeling deprived or anything! I just feel a bit annoyed with myself more than anything cos i feel like if i had worked harder those days i had nights out and off plan i would be further along with it all. Tbh i couldve lost about 10 pounds by now if id pulled my finger out. I do feel like my leader was a bit like that with me this week, im sure she thinks im not taking it seriously!!

Grrr! I hate feeling like this, i just want all this weight to be gone now!!
 
Im pleased to say im feeling a lot better today. I think yesterday i let myself get down in the dumps after going clothes shopping with oh. He always looks in the dead trendy shops and i just felt massive compared to everyone in there. Even tho everyone else in there was probably in their teens!! But that made me feel a bit crap and old as well!! Gggrrr!!

But anyway i tried on 'the dress' today and im pleased to announce it nearly does up now! I think last week i must have had a bit of totm bloat. Its not too far off looking good now so im pleased. Big smile today!!

What i have realised tho over the last couple of days is im less concerned about how much i weigh/lose and more concerned with how i actually look and my size. Id like to look more toned rather than simply lose weight, so im thinking i need to get back into doing something weights based. I saw a massive improvement in my shape doing the 30 day shred last year and have always been happiest with my size when i do weights. So im gonner start back doing something like that.
 
I need to keep posting in lots of little posts on my phone cos it keeps losing 3g which means i can do a massive post but it wont post it!! Gggrrr!! So i didnt wanna lose what id written. Anyway!!

Ive talked to oh about his mum and sw and hes asked me to stick with it for the time being. I think hes worried, like i am, if i dont go with her she wont go at all. He also says that at least she is losing something and doesnt want to undermine what she has achieved. He does get mad when i tell him what shes had off plan tho!

Ive had a really nice weekend for all i had my big sulk last night. Its been nice chilling out with my oh and family after spending last weekend in work. Im not quite sure whats planned for today other than the food shop. I might talk oh into taking me to see kung fu panda!!
 
So i am back after being awol from sw. Ive been all round the houses trying various different diets but the problem is i can never find a diet that still lets me binge on chocolate and cakes etc and still lose three pound a week every week. It sounds ridiculous but this is what ive been expecting!! But now im back 100 on sw and sticking to it. Im focusing very much on my emotional issues around my weight loss. Ive realised i always want to binge eat at certain times and i need to deal with that to successfully get to the weight i want. Ive also realised in expect too much of my body and want to lose weight quicker than is healthy. Im not aiming for anything anymore other than to just stick to sw doing zumba and taking what comes.

Ive kept going to class with my mil through all this which quite frankly is getting a little boring now. She is still no further along nor making any progress. Its only cos ive settled into that group now that i dont wanna change groups and still go. I do wonder sometimes if ive spent too much time worrying about her weight loss when i should focus on my own!! Mmmm.

So i cant post much more now as im in work but i promise i will keep this updated with my journey!!
 
Todays food/exercise - ee
Breakfast- banana pear apple
Two boiled eggs baked beans
HEA 350ml skmd milk in tea with sweetener through day

Exercise - 45 mins zumba

Lunch - chicken breast tomato cucumber pepper
Alpen light 1/2HEB

Tea - chicken mug shot
Alpen light 1/2 HEB
Apple pear banana

Syns - lolly pop 1.5
2 Slices white bread and jam 10

Drinks - nas squash and tea
 
Im happy with how today has gone and feel good for being back on plan properly without worrying about weighing and measuring all the time!

It was pretty dull in work today as i was on my own for most of the evening. I think at times like that is when i wanna eat crap cos im bored. I noticed today though that when i was bored i came on here and was looking at other diets thinking oh if i did that i could lose lots!!! Must stop doing that!! Im gonner make sure i have my ipod and some mags with me to distract me when im bored.

Am pleased to report my skinny jeans that i havent worn for a couple of weeks are now big on me. Whoop whoop! I do feel like i can feel a difference now so i know my hard work is paying off.
 
welcome back.... glad you've got yourself back on track....
Listen, this is a long term, good habit forming plan.....
sone weeks you'll lose loads, some weeks just a little or stay the same...but, you didn't put in on overnight, so you can't expect to lose it overnight.
Yep, I agree, there are some diets out there where you'll lose loads, you'll feel like crap, and be a miserable cow...then...just to finish it off, you'll put it all back on the minute you start to have a vaguely real life!!
I know it's your name, but I'm sure you've heard the phrase -
slowly, slowly, catchy monkey..... it will happen, but not overnight.

As for the skinny jeans well done, that's great
 
Debridger said:
welcome back.... glad you've got yourself back on track....
Listen, this is a long term, good habit forming plan.....
sone weeks you'll lose loads, some weeks just a little or stay the same...but, you didn't put in on overnight, so you can't expect to lose it overnight.
Yep, I agree, there are some diets out there where you'll lose loads, you'll feel like crap, and be a miserable cow...then...just to finish it off, you'll put it all back on the minute you start to have a vaguely real life!!
I know it's your name, but I'm sure you've heard the phrase -
slowly, slowly, catchy monkey..... it will happen, but not overnight.

As for the skinny jeans well done, that's great
Click to expand...

Hey debringer thanks for stopping by and offering good advice as always!! I really must get better and keeping this up to date. You are so right this is a change for life and some weeks are good and some weeks are not so good. I had a good week last week im not too optimistic for my wi tonight. I feel ive been eating more and exercised less. Ive stocked up on plenty superfree for the week ahead and am planning on a few success express daus to give myself a boost. Im at that annoying between sizes stage and i know a few pounds would make a huge difference so i wanna try and get a good couple of losses and back into my 12s
 
Gggrrr just did a massive post and cancelled it!!!! Ggggrrr!!! I sts at wi last night which i was happy about. Today ive got off to a great start on being 100% and having plenty superfree. Ive also been out for a lovely walk in the sunshine this evening with oh. Who knew losing weight could be so easy or fun!! Today my work skirt was massive but i have the same on in a 12 which is still a little tight. I hate being at that between sizes stage. I know just another three or four pounds will make all the difference, i just want to get to that point sooner than later. Dunno why im complaining tho i cant afford anymore clothes till pay day in another three weeks so ill have to make do till then!!! Lol!!!
 
Good lord im sure all this fruit and veg is doing me no good!! I need an activia or a colonic or both!!!

As part of trying to up my superfree im having a fruit salad as breakfast and for my tea im swapping spuds for roast superfree veggies. I dont feel too bad for it other than i am soooooooo bloated all the time. Deffo need a colonic!!

Despite the massive belly im continuing to notice positives with my clothes getting looser. Today my belt was hanging off me despite being on the tightest notch.

Not too much to report other than a usual day at work and a lazy evening with the man of my life curled up on the sofa. Watched that sherlock on iplayer which i am really enjoying - am such a geek!! No real plans for the wknd at the moment. The MIL has finally admitted she needs help going over plan so i will be going over that with her at some point. Fingers crossed things might be looking up on that front.

But for now me and my belly are off to find some peppermint oil capsules!!
 
haha, yeah, I know what you mean about the fruit, I'm ok most of the time, but if I do a week of green - flipping 'eck.
It's great when the weather is good, I always feel more inclined to get off my bum and get some fresh air & excercise.
STS is ok, I had a small half pound loss, but it's on it's way down, that's what counts.
Glad MIL has finally found her tongue, snd asked for help.....then once she's got her head round it, she might be supportive towards you too.
Inbetweeny clothes are a pain, having said that, I do like flashing to my oh without undoing my jeans lol
Hope you have a good week.,,..
 
Debridger said:
haha, yeah, I know what you mean about the fruit, I'm ok most of the time, but if I do a week of green - flipping 'eck.
It's great when the weather is good, I always feel more inclined to get off my bum and get some fresh air & excercise.
STS is ok, I had a small half pound loss, but it's on it's way down, that's what counts.
Glad MIL has finally found her tongue, snd asked for help.....then once she's got her head round it, she might be supportive towards you too.
Inbetweeny clothes are a pain, having said that, I do like flashing to my oh without undoing my jeans lol
Hope you have a good week.,,..
Click to expand...

Thanks debringer. Well done on the half a pound, its all a loss at the end of the day and it all adds up to the end goal! Lol at flashing to your other half without undoing jeans!!

Ive found the way forward with the fruit is not to have diet coke with my lunch and have peppermint oil capsules on standby!! Its not been half as bad today but i did green and im wondering if fruit and meat dont agree with each other!!

Spent a ded exciting friday night in with mil going over plan. Do feel like she spent a lot of time trying to work out how many syns were in ready meals rather than taking onboard idea of free food. But i cant knock her really. Fingers crossed things change for the better now.

For some reason we thought it would be a good idea to watch the human centipede tonight after one of my mates was going on about it!! I knocked it off half way through mainly cos it was crap and you knew where it was gonner go and i didnt have the stomach for it tonight!!!

After two weekends working i have a weekend off with oh which im looking forwards to. Still dont have much planned, maybe squeeze in a visit to the cinema and i was threatening to try and go for a run tomorrow. Suddenly zumba seems so much better!! May also give my ufc trainer game another go. I did it on monday and only really recovered yesterday i was soooo sore!! Its also a bit fiddly on the kinect.

Today ive been on plan which im feeling really good about. I feel like its finally starting to click for me. The leader had said in class this week to choose superfree foods first to boost your weight loss and i think this has helped me to see what i need to focus on. I should choose superfree first and if im still hungry then have something free. Thing is i do find the superfree fills me up just fine. So im happy with how thats going. Finger crossed for a good wknd!!
 
I am currently sat in a beer garden drinking diet coke!! The things i do to shift this weight!!

I have my usual wknd paranoia that i wont lose any weight this week and whats the point blah blah blah. Thing is i know ive done really well having all my superfree this week including today so i dont know why i worry as much as i do. Im determined to power through this and see a good loss this week!!
 
So i did what i tell everyone not to do and sneak peaked this weekend. The scales showed a sts which i am mad about tbh! Ive become everything i ever hated lol!! Tbh i dont know why im mad there is nothing i can do between now and wi to change it now and you know what it may even show a loss?!
 
grrrrr at you, don't sneaky peek, take this slap :whoopass:
You know that you're naughty for doing so....and you know that it's quite possble that it will be different come official WI

Keep on the straight and narrow - you'll be fine!!!
 
Debridger said:
grrrrr at you, don't sneaky peek, take this slap :whoopass:
You know that you're naughty for doing so....and you know that it's quite possble that it will be different come official WI

Keep on the straight and narrow - you'll be fine!!!
Click to expand...

Ha ha thanks for the slap. For all my.moaning ive had a look back at my last week and while i thought i was on plan i can think for a few times ive been over syns etc so maybe the sts is deserved. I dunno. I know i need to get my backside in gear tho cos its 11 weeks until my hols and i must shift at least half a stone between now and then otherwise i will have nothing to wear on it!! Lol!!

So i will go class tomorrow see what the damage is and then its 100% for august for munky to get this last bit off!!
 
Debridger said:
well, a bit of excercise - keep track of your syns, and get enough superfree, you'll lose the half stone easy!!!!
Click to expand...

Thanks Debringer! I do think it i pull my finger out it will come off. And get into the zumba again. Ive let it slip in favour of walks lately.

I lost half a pound today which i think is ok considering how i felt yesterday. Its gonner be star week next week so im not holding out for a big loss next week either :(
 
So i am feeling a little sorry for myself. Ive had my usual 'twilight tuesday' and i feel a bit rubbish for it tbh. Even if i get away with it on the scales next week i feel like it does nothing to help me get into my holiday clothes :( im seeing this as my last one, no more twilight zone. I do feel focused now as i look forwards to my holiday everytime im tempted now i tell myself 'shorts' or 'dress' remember how tight they are and stick to plan. Must keep it up!!

Ive got my meals planned and made ready for tomorrow. Im in work late the rest of the week which i feel a bit pants about. I miss my fella and dont enjoy it so much on there at the mo. Theres so much going on with the changes it just winds me up. I should really see this as an excellent opportunity to leave and do just that. But as stupid as it sounds this is the longest job ive had and the one ive enjoyed most. Ive worked at the organisation for nearly ten years (i was 22!!) and had this job six years. I guess im kinda scared of the big bad world out there!!
 
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