The shrinking violets official thread - Team 1

I am completely rubbish.

I just can't do this. I can't stick to it. I'm 18st again and rising. Why can't I stop stuffing my face???

I decided to stop CD and follow WW but after a week I have gained 4lbs and I have cheated so much! Why can't I do this anymore???

I'm so desperate now. I'm back at the "I hate me" stage again and that won't even keep me on track. I really think I need a new CDC but all of the ones round here are working for mine. She just doesn't seem bothered with me since I told her I can't think about being a CDC until I get my head sorted out and that I am moving away in September. What to do!!!

I have an interview at Swansea Uni on Tuesday which is great. Too bad that I'm going in as an 18st blimp instead of the svelte 11st something beauty that I could have been by now!!!! I'm so angry at myself!!!

I'm a crap team mate, crap at this diet and generally just crap!
 
Hey Gem, you are definately not crap..... only 5% of people who lose weight on VLCDs maintain their weightloss, so you fall into the majority, which in all respects is obviously the norm as it is the majority, so you have only done what the majority of people tend to do, and why is this? Because losing weight and maintaining your loss has got to be the hardest thing to do as we have to eat to live and so we do it every day, we cannot avoid it as we need it. Adverts on the tv push food at us, emails come through our computers and adverts in newspapers and magazines advertising the latest chocolate bars, it is no wonder the majority of people find losing weight and keeping it off so hard. You really need to be in the right place to do Cambridge and I know that many a time if I had of given in to a craving I would NEVER have been able to get back on track, and that is the only reason I haven't cheated, I am too frightened too.... I was a skinny teenager and until I had my first child was a size 10, since then I have put on more and more weight until I reached a size 20 last year, my biggest ever. I had been to WW before and got down to 11 stone, but put it all back on and then some, I have joined WW several times and it has only lasted a few weeks and I became demotivated with the weight loss..... cambridge is the only diet where I have lost so much weight in a short amount of time, but it is SO SO hard, I have struggled with my demons every step of the way, and I am now 45 and it has taken me all these years since I had my first child at 19 to be in the right place to lose this weight and hopefully keep it off, but I know I will still struggle to maintain.... but when I do eat something I shouldn't and put on a 1lb or 2, I will get straight back on track because that is all I can do, I will try not to beat myself up about it because after all I am only human and we are far from perfect. Maybe you could start with the 1500 cal plan for a few weeks, I'm not being funny, but at your age and weight you should still lose at least 2lb a week and then see how you feel... maybe on 1500 you can still manage to fit a few treats in, or limit yourself to one treat a week after a successful WI.... try and find something that will work for you.. I treated myself to something every 7lb and the closer to goal I get the better the treat... at 10stone 7 I treated myself to a pair of GHDs, I am getting a new tattoo once I get to goal...

Gem you are definately not crap, if you were that would mean 95% of people that had ever lost weight on a VLCD and regained it were also crap and that is just not true, they are just human beings and we all have our failings.... please please pick yourself up and dont place demands on yourself which you know you cannot keep because they will keep dragging you down.... set a realistic goal and stick to it..

Take care of yourself hun.....
 
Hi Gem
Hang on in there. For me every single day is a batle with willpower and sometimes I give in and start again the next day and other times I manage to stay in control. It's been like that all my life! I'm having hypnotherapy and NPL treatments over the next two weeks to help me try to change my mindset - I'll let you know how I get on - it may be something that might help you. I've tried everything else!!!!

Try not to be too hard on yourself when you're having a bad day - imagine you are own your best friend and what would you do to look after your best friend if she was having this bad day?

Big hugs,
Amanda newbie xxxx
 
Thanks guys!

I took a step today and went to see my CDC. I am restarting tomorrow.

I have stepped away from the tetras and gone back to the sachets as I seemed to find it easier to stick to when I had to take the time to make up my shakes.

I have three months until uni (if I get in) and I want to be back at 14st 11lbs. That's 3st to lose. I so can do that!!! x
 
Well done Gem on seeing your CDC.... I never found the tetras as filling as the packet shakes, plus I divide my shakes into 2 and have 6 halves, I make them up with the same amount of milk though (I actually think they taste much better more watered down) and that way I space them out evenly throughout the day which means I "eat" more often and dont feel so deprived.... I know there is never too many hours until the next one.
3 stone in 3 months is definately doable and fingers crossed you do get into Uni, will be exciting.... definately a motivation to lose the weight. You also looked stunning at 14st 11lbs....
 
Hi Gem

Well done. What university are you going to? I work at Staffordshire University as a student guidance advisor, so if there's any general uni information you may need help with let me know! What do you want to study? It will be amazing if you can get started before then because it will help your confidence no end! I'm starting from scratch again this week - I'm well out of ketosis. It will be hard tommorrow because we're out all day at Silverstone car racing, but I've frozen 3 bottles with 250 mls water in, so as it defrosts it will still be cold so I can make my shakes up while I'm out. Linda - I looooove your idea of splitting the shakes down into half and may try that tommorrow! I've got a very challenging week ahead - it's the Universities Award ceremonies this week and for the first two days I'm on usher duty in the ceremony tent, which means I'll get very dehydrated - there's nowhere to keep bags and nowhere to buy water so you can literally only keep a little on you! They provide lunch bags but it doesn't make it easy when you're doing your own thing and the car park is too far away to make it there and back in my break!!!!! At the end of my second day (which is my birthday) I'm then going out for dinner to an Indian Restaurant with a group of friends. At least on the Wednesday I'm in the gowning tent so I can have a bag with me then and take my own stuff in. Thursday and Friday are normal office days so they shouldn't be too bad - thankfully!!!! Challenging week but I'm determined to get back on track! I'm aiming for a three pound weight loss next week.

I've had my weigh in today Linda and I've put on 2lbs - sorry to start my first week on a negative!

Good luck this week to everyone in the Shrinking Violets - hope we all manage to stick with it!!!!!
 
Thanks Greeneyes :D I felt great at 14st 11lbs so that's my main target for now.

Amanda - I have applied to Swansea to study Egyptology. Got an interview on Tuesday which I am so excited about but also extremely nervous!!! I did go to uni before (UEA in Norwich) but I hated the uni and the course so really it was never going to work out. I did a year and one semester so unfortunately that means I don't qualify for a tuition fee loan for the first two years of my new degree. That sucks so much because I have to pay for it myself and it's going to be a struggle. Luckily I have a partner who works full time, but if I didn't, I couldn't do it at all. We are trying to save as much money as we can to move over there. it's such a big step but I need a new start so badly!!! x
 
I am really feeling good about this!!! Frances, you were right about coming on here more. I have been on here all day today. New tickers, new targets. I feel positive!!! Day 1 down! x
 
Hi Gem, congratulations on doing a day on SS, a very good start, hoping today will be as good for you and good luck with your interview tomorrow( I think it is tomorrow isn't it?)...
 
Yes it is, thanks hun!

Today has gone well. It has made so much of a difference having the sachets instead of the tetras. They are so much more filling!!! I don't even feel hungy!

I'm looking forward to getting through next week so I can have the bars again. One cranberry bar a day keeps me happy! Especially if I chop it up into little bits and eat it like popcorn in front of a movie. I guess it's all about tricking yourself when it comes to things like that! How is everyone else doing??? x
 
I love looking at my signature and seeing all those tickers! It really spurs me on. Just giving them a makeover and setting interim targets has made me realise that by New Year, I WILL be at my goal!!! :bliss:
 
I find the sachets more filling too, only have the tetras if I am out and nothing else is available.... I have also started having the choc bars again, I cut mine up and eat them slowly, like to enjoy them as there is never really enough... lol
 
I agree! They are like heaven when you haven't eaten anything in months!

I feel really positive this time. I know I am going to do it. I can't believe I neglected Minimins for so long! Being on here the past few days has really inspired me to get on with it! x
 
My goodness, I take a break for less than a week and it all happens. Aww Gem, I am so pleased to see you back. Was so worried about you. Love the new piccy -- YOU LOOK FAB! As always! And also love all the new tickers. I can really see the old Gem is back and you really are going to do it this time.

Linda and Amanda, thanks so much for being here for Gem. Read all your inspiring posts and Linda, I really agree with a lot of what you say as I am in the same boat as you. Amanda, is so lovely to have a regular new teamie. Thanks so much for choosing team 10.

Well, I had my 43rd birthday (and yes, I ate cake and drank wine)BUT I only stayed the same! Yay! Never thought I would say this but I was over the moon that I seemed to have got away with a birthday week! So back on track now. Want to get moving again. Gonna drink 3 litres today.

Gem, don't forget the water. I have found that not only does it help with the weight loss, and you have to drink water on CD, but that it really, really helps to keep me on track. I have found that although it is a real concentrated effort to drink 3 litres in a day, that I am far less likely to cheat if I am having a good water day.

Speak soon,
Frances
 
Hi Frances, guess what I gained 1lb this week.... not sure how, I know I ate Sunday, but after saving cals Sunday and Monday, I should have still lost the 1lb I put on, I think it is because I have started at the gym this week and am burning 250 cals a day, my CDC says I have shocked my body and it doesn't know what to do... lol. If I haven't lost anything next week she reckons I should move up to 1200..... but... have had a think today and have decided to up my target to 10 stone 5, which means I am nearly there, that way I am just into my healthy BMI.... If it wasn't for my tummy which seems to be all excess skin and not fat, I would be an 8-10 top and bottom, and since losing weight these last few weeks, my muffin top seems to have got worse, I think it is because there is no fat in my tummy to keep it in my jeans and my jeans constantly fall down and if I put a belt on.... voila a bigger muffin top once it works its way out of my jeans..... and I will also be toning up at the gym, so will hopefully get slightly smaller. I am now losing all the weight from my boobs too which I wasn't before, so thinking haven't really got much fat to lose from other places and dont want to lose them totally.... lol The only problem I have is that I feel like I am failing and am raising my target weight because I haven't yet reached the one I have..... but I am not sure if I lose another 7lb whether I will like my body or not.... awwww I thought these decisions would get easier the closer to goal I got....
Hope you had a good birthday Frances, dont worry about the wine and cake, you have to treat yourself once in a while and you did STS so no problem there.
 
Hey Frances, great to hear from you again!! Staying the same after a birthday week is quite an achievement!

My uni interview went really well and I should find out with 2-3 weeks! So excited!!!

I feel like I have been hit by a bus today. Really fluey and aching. I went to work but had to come home again. Am currently in bed and really not feeling like forcing down my food packs. My throat is really sore and swollen :confused:

Drinking lots of water though. The scales haven't moved much this week. 5lbs loss since Sunday. I suppose it is only day 4. Perhaps I am being too hard on myself! x
 
Hi Gem, sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. Hang in there. Hopefully you will just get lots of sleep so the day will go faster. And make sure you have those packs! And stop peeping! You of all people! You know very well that the magic happens during the night before weigh-in!

Linda, that pound is just a blip, it will be gone in the morning. I too have found that my tummy is looking bigger these days. It is so strange. Some days I feel as big as I did as a size 18. Beginning to think that I do get bloated and that when I was bigger I didn't really notice it! I need to get to 10 stone (another 7 lbs) to get my BMI just under 25 and I too amd thinking of stopping there. It's a tough call. About the saggy skin, I have been told that you must give it a month for every stone you have lost for it to recover. It needs time and toning.
Back Tuesday, have a great CD weekend!
 
And the result is...

8LBS GONE!!!! I'm so pleased because it's only been 5 full days! :bliss:

Also...


I GOT ACCEPTED INTO SWANSEA UNI!!!!!
:talk017:

I feel much better today as well so looks like things are looking up!!! x
 
Woohoo, Way To Go, Gem...... 8lbs and a place at Uni...... now you have a major incentive to lose the weight and a goal to do it by too.... congratulations.... I am so very very pleased for you, now you will have to look for a place in Swansea, lots of exciting things for you to do which will hopefully take your mind off food.... lol
 
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